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Why do I not find my wife attractive?

mrgoodstuff

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It's not her it's me, 100%
So lets make you the lady and her the male. In that situation where the husband is not sexualized and the wife is starving him out. He's getting less and and less attractive by the day, as she "validates" a non-sexual image of that male. He might as well not have a c0ck in her image of him.

LET him get out and go get a girlfriend and start ****1ng. His sexual swag will raise in a few sessions. His movements even his tone of voice will be more steady and confident. She will be able to HEAR the sex in him and it will turn her on. Now that his image has been sexualized by another she "can set it", now she's horny.

I asked you to just be a decent person and sexualize her. You don't have to use her. Show her some things. If she is willing to learn and willing to please you, she will grow. Her beauty will become ignited from your validation and treatment.

You were aware that your treatment of a female can dog her down and make her almost ugly? And your treatment of a female can also lift her up,inject confidence and assuredness and make her more attractive. It's about the energy.
 

mrgoodstuff

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So lets make you the lady and her the male. In that situation where the husband is not sexualized and the wife is starving him out. He's getting less and and less attractive by the day, as she "validates" a non-sexual image of that male. He might as well not have a c0ck in her image of him.

LET him get out and go get a girlfriend and start ****1ng. His sexual swag will raise in a few sessions. His movements even his tone of voice will be more steady and confident. She will be able to HEAR the sex in him and it will turn her on. Now that his image has been sexualized by another she "can set it", now she's horny.

I asked you to just be a decent person and sexualize her. You don't have to use her. Show her some things. If she is willing to learn and willing to please you, she will grow. Her beauty will become ignited from your validation and treatment.

You were aware that your treatment of a female can dog her down and make her almost ugly? And your treatment of a female can also lift her up,inject confidence and assuredness and make her more attractive. It's about the energy.
I mean if you had real confidence in your deck game you'd know these things.
 

Plinco

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Okay, so I figured it out and in essence this is the issue:

What I drew out on 'paper' for the kind of girl I was looking out for did not reflect who I truly was, but what would work statistically for the sake of having children. I was not aware that I was lying to myself this whole relationship that I had with her until I realized that I do not at all find her sexually attractive. In order to find her attractive, I need to change my inner convictions.

Once someone is red-pilled, one can only change one's convictions toward rationality. In other words, one can only become more rational in changing or identifying oneself.

There's no way I can change my convictions in a rational manner in such a way to find her attractive. Therefore I'm afraid that divorce is inevitable
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I just realized something. The added pressure and stress of her demands and wanting a family that I am not ready to have is what makes me not want to have sex with her. Whenever I get angry or stressed out I don't feel sexual.
Sounds like accidentally on purpose pregnancy waiting to happen.
 

Plinco

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Pic of said 'unattractive ' wife?
 

Plinco

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Plinco

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Update:

she is trying hard to convince me to stay with her. Trying to convince me that love does not necessarily equal sex.
 

Solomon

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The problem was, that the physical attraction wasn't there to begin with. She is compatible in terms of our personalities, but not in a sexual way. If I could find her attractive physically, that would be great, otherwise she is more of a maid in my house.
Why the heck would you get married to a woman you're not sexually attracted too? did you think "in time" you would?

Sorry OP don't feel sorry for you, you put yourself in this predicament
 

Zimbabwe

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She's not that bad looking, more of a plain Jane. It doesn't help that she dresses like an old lady and wears no makeup.

I think the OP is just used to dating a certain type of woman, and married this one only because she was a traditional Christian.

I get it OP, you feel guilty about potentially leaving her.
 
Last edited:

Plinco

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She's not that bad looking, more of a plain Jane. It doesn't help that she dresses like an old lady and wears no makeup.

I think the OP is just used to dating a certain type of woman, and married this one only because she was a traditional Christian.

I get it OP, you feel guilty about potentially leaving her.
You hit it right on the nail
 

Plinco

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Update: I've been talking to her about everything that I have been thinking and she's getting the realization that I'm probably going to end up leaving her. She's been begging me to stay with her
 

Fruitbat

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This whole thread is bizzare.

I agree, troll
 

Plinco

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This whole thread is bizzare.

I agree, troll
I'm not a troll

Edit:

If you are serious about making an accusation then prove it.
 

Fruitbat

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I'm not a troll

Edit:

If you are serious about making an accusation then prove it.
You’re confusing a forum with an academic discussion.
 

Plinco

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Fruitbat

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I should not have to prove that I'm not a troll
Ive not asked you to prove it.
I’ve stated my view.
You’ve stated yours.
End of discussion.
move on
 

AureliusMaximus

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Been married for over a year and have not had sex, not because she didn't want it, but because I did not want to do it with her.
Why did you marry her in the first place?

You only been married for only a year - you must have ignored some pretty big red flags and still married her even though you knew you were not really sexually attracted to her, right?

 
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