DJ Bootcamp 2019

shouldbefun

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Maybe they wanted to talk to her too but didn't have the confidence to do it themselves. So they piggybacked off your approach and jumped in when they saw the opportunity.

I haven't had many chances to talk with girls this week besides the few I've mentioned. Girls are definitely been around but I haven't really been in the mood. Gonna try to force myself out of that today. My excuses for not approaching; feeling a bit discouraged by getting numbers and not being able to convert to dates then plates, feeling a bit lonely at times due to being in a new place (which, oddly, makes me want to keep to myself). But I won't let these things hold me back, I know it just takes time and persistence so let's get back in.
Maybe, but I was so surprised when they interrupted us, anyways, on one hand, I felt white knighting that I clarified instead of her, on another, felt that I maintained frame, answered them and steered the girl back to me, conversation wise, because they could have jumped in and continued talking till the cows come home.


Get after it. I understand, feeling good vibes is important. Best way is to do something good for yourself. Focus on the small picture. You are already getting better. Soon you'll get there. I can expand further if requested.
 

GrowingPains

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Omw to class, decided to drop back and chat to a girl I saw walking behind me. We made eye contact as I looked over my shoulder to see if she was still there so I engaged.

I was chillin', not pressed to practice any techniques or anything. My only goal was to talk. Had a good chat about random stuff. She said she likes hiking and I've been considering going on a hike this weekend. Asked her if she's been to the one I am considering. She said nah. I had to go the other way for class so I got her number.

She seemed a little surprised that I asked. I said maybe we can go on a hike sometime. She took my phone and said yeah I can show you around. I'll hit her line tonight to let her know she's welcome to join me on the hike if she'd like (#bars). Not really concerned with any waiting to text times, just interested in having company on this here hike. If she comes, she comes. If she doesn't, I was going anyways.
 

shouldbefun

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Been getting some coffee, a girl I knew for some time, I know her badly, been saying hi's only when we bump into each other. Not interested in her, but hey better than to stare at your phone when waiting for coffee. Talked to her, jovial at the start but as we continued talking she had this nervousness in her voice, I tried to maintain my cool. Not sure why? I agreed on something and then she asked what I do, but there were hardly any questions to me, so small ioi I guess. When I got my coffee, I bounced. Could have stayed but wasn't sure if thats losing frame. Interview questions just to keep the convo going, so no seduction flirty topics yet.

Sat opposite to a nice chick, but I wasn't totally into her. A good 6. I didn't talk to her because she looked busy so I let it go. Convinced that I'll try another time. Met each other with an eye contact, she smiled so did I. Later caught her as I was leaving, said an opener and lets meet up. Said she's super busy with studying. Soft rejection instead of bf, means getting better ?

Talked to another girl about the weather, just the normal talk. Few sentences and thats it.

Feels not enough. Feels little.

Questions :
fist bumps instead of hand shakes ? makes you more laid back ?
1) When you get your coffee, should you bounce or wait for the girl till she gets her coffee.
2) Should you chase after a girl you see that is walking fast or let one go even if you really like her ? Or **** the frames in this case.
3) When sitting opposite a chick, in a silent area, should you open at any moment or just when you leave or wait till she leaves the study area and you leave as well and then approach and open her up ? I guess both options work fine, but which ones less awkward ?
4) Feels like I should jump to 10 people a day, 10 interesting, hot people but it feels hard finding that many, plus the availability of my time is also an issue. Need to study, deadlines etc etc...
 

GrowingPains

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Soft rejection instead of bf, means getting better ?
Did you guys have a conversation or you just opened then said let's meet up? Also, I'm curious what you usually say when you initiate the approach?

Feels not enough. Feels little.
Gotta crawl before you walk, ykno.

fist bumps instead of hand shakes ? makes you more laid back ?
Sounds like a quick way to put yourself in the friend zone. I've also noticed that if I give guys a fist bump, it feels childish. Nowadays I reserve fist bumps for joking.

1) When you get your coffee, should you bounce or wait for the girl till she gets her coffee.
At the very least, you can say 'See you later so and so, have a good day/enjoy your coffee/good talking with you/I've got to run". It's courteous, no matter whether it's a male or female. That kind of thing makes you more approachable among people you know, I think. People are so weird nowadays, walking past people they know and not saying a word or avoiding eye contact. Don't be that way, it lacks confidence and social tact. Not the way a DJ would behave, I think.

2) Should you chase after a girl you see that is walking fast or let one go even if you really like her ? Or **** the frames in this case.
Haha I find this one funny because it's relatable. I often just quicken my pace to catch up to a girl if I think she's cute. I did it earlier this week in one of my posts. But my thought on it is I'll speed up and as long as she's in my path to where I'm going, then if I catch her, cool. If she turns another direction, oh well - I'll keep the pace, and at least I'm going to get to my destination faster.

3) When sitting opposite a chick, in a silent area, should you open at any moment or just when you leave or wait till she leaves the study area and you leave as well and then approach and open her up ? I guess both options work fine, but which ones less awkward ?
Hmm... I had this issue earlier this week. Sometimes it's just not appropriate to talk to a girl. It's not always clear when those times are. I think if you wanna take the chance, take the chance. If she looks busy, it's probably not in your best interest to try. Like AMS says, yeah he's gotten numbers from women who had their earphones in, talking on the phone, etc. But the success rate is low. In a specific case like the library, if you can keep your voice respectfully low, throw a feel feeler questions out there to see if she'll engage you. If she gives you short responses and looks back at her work .. you know the deal, move on.

Need to study, deadlines etc etc...
Keep the priorities straight for sure. I started to feel guilty of not doing as much as I could on the boot camp as I thought I could sometimes. Or feel guilty because I didn't meet a boot camp deadline. But at the end of the day, do what you can and don't let this be a controlling factor in your life. It's supposed to make your life better, not be your life. I'm talking to myself here too. As long as you're progressing, you're golden. Push yourself, sure. But within reason.
 

GrowingPains

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Walked home (back to our respective apartments) with a girl from class the other day. Those lips and those eyes got me thinkin things non-math-related. But I was just trynna see what's to shawty so I initiated a little physical contact while we're walking. She swerved it and later revealed that she has a boyfriend of 5 years. The chat was fun though, good 20 mins, friendly ting.

Saw a girl wearing a shirt of a college where I'm from in the dining hall (lmao all these dining hall stories). Asked her if she was from there, she was like.. a 5, yoga pants probably made her a 6. Butter face ting. But she was like nah this is my friend's shirt blah blah. She seemed in a rush to exit the conversation asap and was walking away as she talked. Dang son, I guess that cantaloupe couldn't wait. Got her name and peaced.
 

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The_411

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Can you be more specific about what you mean? The response is a bit vague, examples would help me understand what you're trying to say.
College gives you unfettered access to women. The key is listening, smiling, having fun, and do things.

Social networking is key. Meet up with lots of different people make friends and just put yourself in places where you have to talk with women.
 

shouldbefun

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Thats the thing, with fist bumping its better than giving handshakes but again, sure its kinda in the middle but if you can go for the hug even better.
I am going to work on this as well.

You can go for a direct opener. Just open her up directly. Man to woman.

Oh and about the coffee, I meant, like I was chatting with this girl when I was waiting, then when they said its ready. I took the drink and then said to the girl "Ok see you. Bye" But like I could have said cool, "thanks" to the barista and kept on chatting with the girl and then walked with her till she gave me a hard no signal, that she's busy etc But I kind of ran out of conversation.
 

GrowingPains

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You can go for a direct opener. Just open her up directly. Man to woman.

Oh and about the coffee, I meant, like I was chatting with this girl when I was waiting, then when they said its ready. I took the drink and then said to the girl "Ok see you. Bye" But like I could have said cool, "thanks" to the barista and kept on chatting with the girl and then walked with her till she gave me a hard no signal, that she's busy etc But I kind of ran out of conversation.
Right, I'm just curious what you mean by direct opener. Like what's an example? When you say opener it sounds very PUA.

When I read your original post on talking to the girl at the coffee shop, it sounded like you weren't interested in her anyway. So leaving after saying 'bye' seems fine. Why would you keep going with her and wasting your time if you weren't that interested?
 

shouldbefun

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Right, I'm just curious what you mean by direct opener. Like what's an example? When you say opener it sounds very PUA.

When I read your original post on talking to the girl at the coffee shop, it sounded like you weren't interested in her anyway. So leaving after saying 'bye' seems fine. Why would you keep going with her and wasting your time if you weren't that interested?
Just an opener. Theres many better than mine. I.e You could say, Hey I keep bumping into you and I just want to say that I find you attractive. Or hey Im "Nickname " I like you/Compliment. Then try to close/invite.

Idk, can't think of anything to explain about the second point.
 

marmel75

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Thick = fat in my book
 

zekko

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shouldbefun

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Opened up a girl from my class. Was kind of hard but ultimately, theres so many things you need to do to chill. Some mistakes such as when she walked in a group, I talked to the other person but didnt introduce myself. Funny lol. No tease/guess x or y. I guess its fine, openers dont really matter much. Reflections.
 

shouldbefun

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Talked to another chick, I have spoken with her several times. Asked a few questions and when she said which year of college I am in, I just said a large value. Didnt get a laugh but got a remark. Later asked if she was waiting for someone, and got a yes, so decided to not be her beta orbiter and said farewell after a short pause. Was these two things right ?
 
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GrowingPains

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Walking out of class. Saw a girl with a tank top on, no bra. It's cold out. Do the math.

We small talked, she was asking me questions which is good. Kino'd a little bit, just touched her arm and commented on the fact that she wasn't wearing sleeves when we were talking about it being cold out.

She originally said she was heading to her dorm. 5 mins later she said she had to go at that moment to meet a professor. Hmm.. loss of interest? Usually my conversations are just normal small talk. I started reading weapons of mass seduction and the art of seduction audiobook on YouTube today. Hopefully I can gleen something from those to spice things up.

I asked what shes up to this weekend as she gave me her number. She rattled some stuff off, sounded busy but y'know... Girls flake on anything for something they have higher interest in. We'll see.
 
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GrowingPains

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This sh!t's too easy

I don't know what it is about today but I feel great.

It didn't start off well, I was about to talk to this HB8 and she started doing something weird with her face. Stopped walking. And looked like she was about to explode lol. Maybe a sneeze? She put her face in her scarf. So this threw me off and I just asked if she was okay and kept it moving. I probably could've used that to my advantage and humored her a bit by telling her she looked like she was about to explode. Hindsight's 20/20. Oh well, if I see her again, I'll go in for the kill.

Saw a tall HB6.5 with a nice face, hesitated mainly because I wasn't in the mindset to talk to anyone. I was pissed that the professor decided to cancel his office hours before the exam and then said there were TA office hours at the time... but there weren't. Thanks, m8. So I walked past her instead of acting on my first instinct to just talk. Turned around to go back to do it and as soon as I got close enough she got on her bike. I laughed to myself, "Hesitation is just like masturbation. In the end, you're only screwing yourself." Rings true every time.

Butfvckalldat.

In the dining hall I saw this girl I see around sometimes. Earlier that day she looked mad so I didn't approach. Saw her in the dining hall (lmao, who knew you could scoop so many chicks in the dining hall) as I was on my way out. I almost hesitated my way out of it but went over, touched her on the elbow and chatted. I don't know if I was being seductive, but I certainly felt seductive and I could notice how it was affecting my body language and the way I talked to her. I was having fun. I turned meeting her into sort of a game at times having her guess where I'm from after I asked her, and doing this with some other things too. Got her number. Saw her just now on the way to class, actually. So I walked up and tapped her shoulder opposite the side I was on. She looked. Ha, got her. We walked for a good 10 mins, talking about fashion, aspirations, other random stuff. Both conversations we had she was asking me questions and wanting to know more, smiling all the while. Teased her, showed her I knew a bit about fashion, very light kino, hugged her before we parted.

Rewind a bit to after I met the first girl, I was omw to study. Saw a girl sitting down and just plopped next to her and started talking as if I already knew her (read that somewhere on here). She was a bit confused at first (as anyone would be if you just plop next to them and start talking). But I could tell she was feeding off my energy, I was having a good time just saying what I wanted. I think it's the fact that I've been listening to the Art of Seduction and @LARaiders85 's comment about being your unfiltered self. Those things helped me to relax and truly realize that I am the prize today. We talked about a lot of random things but most notably, we were talking about how she didn't like pineapples on pizza because they're wet and she doesn't want wet stuff in her mouth so of course I capitalized on the opportunity to plant some sexual seeds in her mind. Got her number, I don't think she asked my name (or that I offered it) so I texted her as I was walking away; "Don't know if I mentioned it but the name's [my last name]. [My first name], [My last name] :cool:". God damn who is this smooth motherfvcker - lmao I'm feeling myself. She texted back "Good to know. [my name]" which is hard to read but the fact that she responded to something that wasn't a quesiton is a good sign so I'll just take it as that.

I was leaving my study spot to go hit a lil workout. Saw this girl I held the door for the other day as I was walking down the stairs. I was a little nervous, but I went for it anyways. Talked to her a bit about where she's from, what she does, related a little bit. I had been thinking earlier that when I tell a girl I want her phone number I need to a better job. Usually I'll say "Lemme get your number, maybe we can blah blah blah sometime". That's weak. So I resolved to say "Lemme get your number, I'd like to get to know you better". I said that after we chatted for about 5 mins and she gave it to me and liked my text when I texted her name. Jamaican cutie, curly hair, hazel green eyes. Damn.
 

shouldbefun

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Wed : approached. Got a number.
Thu : no approaches.
Fri : Mood was off all day. I feel like those STEM courses lower your testosterone levels. Downloaded tinder, deleted it after two hours when I saw the quality of the fish.

Heading out of uni, saw a chick I liked walk past me and I was like split second "**** I have to meet her". So I turned around and opened her. You know that song "lose yourself" yeah that was me. Super nervous, adrenaline spiking till the limits. I approach and just as I approach I recognize her from an earlier 4-5 months experience, which shows lack of experience and abundance. I'm like "hey I think we have met before..." and then she's like "I think i remember you too", and she kept asking me "where ?" multiple times... actually I did meet her before, about 4-5 months before but we just talked, no close. This time, Im game mode fired up. We walk and talk, somehow Im out of breath ( out of nervousness and adrenaline) and then I try to close her. Throughout the conversation, my soul wants to run away and hide somewhere safe but I keep on going. Got a soft smiley no. Felt like a bum asking for money. I was like great, one more rejection. Pissed at the rejection but hyped that I opened her up. Glad I found the balls to do this. Solid 8 with brains. Messed this one but then again I like this quote " Never quit. Fail till the end."....But yeah it hits the ego well...

One thing, I dropped the direct opener and go for the conversations. I actually forget to do a direct opener, which sucks kinda.

Growing pains, you still nervous when you approach or it went away?
 

GrowingPains

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Yeah I still get nervous and sometimes even hesitate my way out of approaching. But I am getting better about just doing it. I realize that when I feel good about myself and don't pedestal use her, I am least nervous and it works in my favor. I do notice that my nerves are more excitement than "oh man I hope I don't screw this up!" though.

My problem is that I usually end up over doing something and acting too thirsty. Making an overly flirty comment over text. Being too available. And it's because I am thirsty. I don't have any girls in my rotation and this testosterone is high at. I am thirsty. But I need to cool it.

Fake it till you make it. But I also need to be on my purpose and stop just going through the motions. My successes/failures with women should be in the back of my mind when I'm grinding. It's not that way right now. They're a distraction. We gotta nip this in the bud real quick.

Yesterday I stopped by the department office and asked some financial aid questions. I complimented the girl's sweater. She laughed and said thank you. I went back 15 minutes later to set up a meeting with her because I had more detailed questions. She said 'oh you're back!' and I was like 'yeah but aren't you glad?' she said yeah, we set up a time for today. I said 'Its a date' she laughed. This morning I met with her, it's an open office and people were around so I didnt try anything until I got my questions answered and at that moment, her co-workers got up to go do something. So I asked if she had any exciting going on this weekend. We talked for a couple minutes. Asked about the necklace she was wearing. Her bf got it monogrammed for her and she just wears it because it makes him happy. I said "dang that's cold. Well I was gonna ask for your number but if you have a boyfriend.." she said "yeah and you're a student so that'd be crossing some weird lines." Told her to have a good weekend and excited the scene. I just wanted to make my intention known, she probably already knew and what I said at the end was quite beta but... Whatever I was nervous.

Eventful day in the dining hall. As I walked in this girl was checking me out so when I saw her inside I approached. It was okay. But turned a little awkward because this time I asked if she was here with anyone and she said yeah but I want expecting that so it threw me off so I just said 'uhh haha.. well lemme get your number and we can get to know each other". Got the digits, but it doesn't feel like anything promising based on our interaction. But whatever.

Another girl who was bad af was with her friends but was leaving when I was. But she was with her friends and i was waiting for a good opportunity to approach aka hesitating. And as always I recognized this and resolved that rejection is better than regret and went for it just for myself. One of the friend split off and I approached the two. They were hopping on their bikes as I asked what they were studying. Freshmen. Unsure of what they wanted to make in. Something about talking to underclassmen feels weird. Anyways, I approached a group. Success. The girl I was interested in was nice, another guy came up and was talking to the girl who I wasn't interested in. Thanks bro. Started to talk to the girl I wanted but didn't go for her number though because she suggested the go because her friend had to get to something. Said nice to meet you as she left though, if I see her again I'll say hi. Mainly just glad I approached.

Two other girls I had approached in the dining hall were there too. Lol I gotta cool it on the dining hall approaches for a while. They weren't around during the approaches though, maybe one girl.

Got 3 numbers on tinder this week. I probably blew one that was high interest by saying something stupid like "I accept late bday lap dances btw so don't stress". I mean it was just a joke because we couldn't get up this weekend but it wasn't necessary. Oh well. I've learned to stop being so overt. I've got a date with one girl tonight, she's cute and seems interested. I almost blew that by being too overt too soon. Then the third girl I posted about in a separate thread called Tinder Sexting. She didn't come over last night, but I asked what other days she's free. She hasn't responded. Oh well.

Kind of tired of failing. I get the numbers, its like clockwork but I always do something to mess it up. need to work on just playing it cool and not letting this thirst shine through. There's just so much sexual frustration pent up, boys. I gotta get this sh!t out.
 

shouldbefun

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Yeah seems like good work, some points to consider :
-workout !!!!! And join sport socities.
-approaching in dining halls, keep it cool, if they see you approaching other girls well you see what you like? Isn’t it what pook embrace article is about? At the end of the day, I think life is short but its important to build some sort of social circle. Build friends too if you still didn’t.
 
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