"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Is Ariana Grande an example of BPD?

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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wolf

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It just feels implausible that a healthy person would find themselves in a situation like this. So I assume he's codependent.
Oh no he's not healthy. His Mom basically abandoned him when she ran off with her younger toyboy lover when he was around 10. He was always a quiet kid. Wouldn't say boo to to a goose kind of thing.
 

AttackFormation

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No, he’s a victim of emotional abuse and beat down by it…
You might think so, but....

Oh no he's not healthy. His Mom basically abandoned him when she ran off with her younger toyboy lover when he was around 10. He was always a quiet kid. Wouldn't say boo to to a goose kind of thing.
I rest my case. The guy is a codependent wreck himself, and that's how they found each other.
 

Billtx49

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You might think so, but....



I rest my case. The guy is a codependent wreck himself, and that's how they found each other.
So you obviously think young child abandonment by a mother doesn’t cause emotional abuse or injury…
He was abandoned by the mother and now wifey abandons him to go bang other men.
I call that emotional abuse…
 
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AttackFormation

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So you obviously think young child abandonment by a mother doesn’t cause emotional abuse or injury…
He was abandoned by the mother and now wifey abandons him to go bang other men.
Nah, I thought that he was already damaged before he met his wife and it wasn't the wife who turned him from hero to zero and codependence, and indeed that was the case.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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wolf

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Nah, I thought that he was already damaged before he met his wife and it wasn't the wife who turned him from hero to zero and codependence, and indeed that was the case.
From what I understand it's his first relationship.
 

Billtx49

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Nah, I thought that he was already damaged before he met his wife and it wasn't the wife who turned him from hero to zero and codependence, and indeed that was the case.
Yes his unhealthy codependence was started by the emotional damage done by the mother, and now he’s getting downright emotional abuse from his wife. Codependence always has a causative factor involved…
 

wolf

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Yes his unhealthy codependence was started by the emotional damage done by the mother, and now he’s getting downright emotional abuse from his wife. Codependence always has a causative factor involved…
The seeds were sown in childhood and his wife watered them.
 

wolf

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Also years ago before they got married she cheated on him with another Woman so this is definitely not a post marriage thing.
 

AttackFormation

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Also years ago before they got married she cheated on him with another Woman so this is definitely not a post marriage thing.
I find it hard to have sympathy in these cases. You can't help someone who sabotages themselves knowingly.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Billtx49

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I find it hard to have sympathy in these cases. You can't help someone who sabotages themselves knowingly.
You call him codependent but don’t realize it has psychological implications and now you say he sabotages himself… smh
It’s like blaming a crippled person for not being able to walk correctly.
 

wolf

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I find it hard to have sympathy in these cases. You can't help someone who sabotages themselves knowingly.
That's why I stay way out of it. Haven't seen him since he was 12 ish. He knows the score but also knows he won't see his kids again if he leaves her. She's already made that clear
 
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