Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

Baibars

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My brother told me about a dude who deleted himself over a girl he was with in a long term relationship. They lived together and she monkey branched to another dude she was banging on the side.

As men in general have become weaker as a whole & females looking for the bigger better deal at its Max, self deletion is pretty common amongst men.

Personaly I am very careful about getting too attached to a chick, if I can sense something is wrong, or warning signs I am picking up on.. I will dip out early on, within the first few months of the relationship, rather than hang around & get monkey branched on 2 years down the line.

Ofen we know the chick is unpredictable, but the sweet pvssy keeps us holding on.
that’s wise. Getting attached is easy, getting detached is hard af depending on the length etc.

I was telling myself I’m red pill I can control myself but you can’t fight human nature. If you invest and build memories with a girl you’re playing with fire especially if she’s not a good one.
 

Baibars

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If I keep ignoring her then wont she just forget about me and eventually find another guy if she hasnt already? Isnt ghosting a woman a bad idea in the sense that it gives them time to forget about us and date new men? How is that a good thing for us if we want to possibly get back with them down the road?
do not focus on ignoring her or getting her back. I think it’s more important for us to focus on detaching. It’s a totally different thing to want a girl when you’re not attached af compared to wanting her when you’re in peace with yourself. Right now you’re in a emotional state.
I’m in a similar situation. I think the best advice is try to heal and get out of that emotional state so you think clear and if you want to give her a chance, let the door open for her but don’t chase while you’re attached and „sick“.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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If I keep ignoring her then wont she just forget about me and eventually find another guy if she hasnt already?
Let's hope so.
You split from her. Move on. Find another woman.
 

soulforge

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that’s wise. Getting attached is easy, getting detached is hard af depending on the length etc.

I was telling myself I’m red pill I can control myself but you can’t fight human nature. If you invest and build memories with a girl you’re playing with fire especially if she’s not a good one.
Absolutely.. Some girls I have interacted with in the past, I can fuk them for months and toss them aside... And then there is that ONE chicks that manages to work her way into your heart.

It's usually the hot sexier ones for me.. However it's difficult, but easier to detatch from a girl 8 months in, than to carry on with her and have your heart stomped on 3 years down the line.

I guess it's about vetting them really hard, and NEXTING the ones if they are not of sound character.

Something I have realised after dating many chicks, and at my age 47.

Pretty much all the monkey branching, or toxic, or attention seeking types, had no father in her life, was either raised by a single mom, or the dad didn't give a chit about her.. And had tattoos, and a pretty high body count.
 

soulforge

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If I keep ignoring her then wont she just forget about me and eventually find another guy if she hasnt already? Isnt ghosting a woman a bad idea in the sense that it gives them time to forget about us and date new men? How is that a good thing for us if we want to possibly get back with them down the road?
You can't negotiate desire my friend. You can't force her to find you super attractive.

Time and distance & you showing her that you are willing to walk away, is what might increase her interest level.

And yes likely she will fuk someone else, and yes likely that dude will not work out..

Guess what, when it doesn't work out with him, she will reach out to you. And you must tell her you're not interested.

Dude once its over, it's fvking over... Even if they come back, you don't want that used up vagina back. Trust me!
 

Baibars

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If I keep ignoring her then wont she just forget about me and eventually find another guy if she hasnt already? Isnt ghosting a woman a bad idea in the sense that it gives them time to forget about us and date new men? How is that a good thing for us if we want to possibly get back with them down the road?
you could also hack her social media to check if she’s texting or fcking other guys just as you hacked and exposed members on this forum.
 

soulforge

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I just read about what no contact actually is. It says that it is used to get over your ex but also used to get them back in some cases. It says that it can cause your ex to reach out to you to get back with you. My question is how do you know if they are contacting you with bread crumbs to see how you are doing versus them actually contacting you to see if they wanna get back with you? My ex contacted me after 1 week of no contact so does that mean no contact worked to get her back or shes bread crumbing me?
I just read about what no contact actually is. It says that it is used to get over your ex but also used to get them back in some cases. It says that it can cause your ex to reach out to you to get back with you. My question is how do you know if they are contacting you with bread crumbs to see how you are doing versus them actually contacting you to see if they wanna get back with you? My ex contacted me after 1 week of no contact so does that mean no contact worked to get her back or shes bread crumbing me?
Anything other than a clear indication that she regrets breaking up and wants to try again, is a bread crumb.
 

johnrambo

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My brother told me about a dude who deleted himself over a girl he was with in a long term relationship. They lived together and she monkey branched to another dude she was banging on the side.
Let me get this straight, "deleted" means he killed himself o_O
 

soulforge

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Gentlemen I didnt tell any of you yet but I met a new woman on friday night. As you all are aware my ex contacted me on Halloween and wanted to talk with my kids to wish them a good Halloween. I want to text my ex this---"Hey I see you contacted me on Halloween. I know you wanna talk with my kids but I dont think its a good idea. I met somebody new and wanna see where things go with her. I dont wanna confuse my kids by them talking with multiple women. I wish you the best of luck on whatever you are looking for"

Should I send this?
Nah will look kinda pathetic, especially when it's a girl you barely even know.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Gentlemen I didnt tell any of you yet but I met a new woman on friday night. As you all are aware my ex contacted me on Halloween and wanted to talk with my kids to wish them a good Halloween. I want to text my ex this---"Hey I see you contacted me on Halloween. I know you wanna talk with my kids but I dont think its a good idea. I met somebody new and wanna see where things go with her. I dont wanna confuse my kids by them talking with multiple women. I wish you the best of luck on whatever you are looking for"

Should I send this?
What part of No Contact is still ambivalent to you?

No, don't send her any texts.
 

MtmVaott

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Gentlemen I didnt tell any of you yet but I met a new woman on friday night. As you all are aware my ex contacted me on Halloween and wanted to talk with my kids to wish them a good Halloween. I want to text my ex this---"Hey I see you contacted me on Halloween. I know you wanna talk with my kids but I dont think its a good idea. I met somebody new and wanna see where things go with her. I dont wanna confuse my kids by them talking with multiple women. I wish you the best of luck on whatever you are looking for"

Should I send this?
That message is a twofold manipulation attempt to make her feel jealous and to make her feel appreciated (= valued) while she has disrespected (= devalued) you. Also you use your kids as an excuse.

Ask yourself how you feel right now and then how you want to feel instead.
 

soulforge

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Gentlemen I didnt tell any of you yet but I met a new woman on friday night. As you all are aware my ex contacted me on Halloween and wanted to talk with my kids to wish them a good Halloween. I want to text my ex this---"Hey I see you contacted me on Halloween. I know you wanna talk with my kids but I dont think its a good idea. I met somebody new and wanna see where things go with her. I dont wanna confuse my kids by them talking with multiple women. I wish you the best of luck on whatever you are looking for"

Should I send this?
No words you put together in a text message, will be as powerful as your complete and utter silence.
 

Dr.Suave

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AmsterdamAssassin

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What would be the down side of me telling her that I have moved on?
What is the purpose of No Contact? Give them NO ATTENTION. Why does this have to be explained to you again and again?

The DOWNSIDE is that anything you text her is VALIDATING HER. And your text shows that you haven't moved on, because you have to throw it in her face. Like a petulant child: "Look at me, I'm almost out the door, do you see me going out the door?"

This has been explained to you again and again, but you keep looking for excuses to contact her or allow her to contact you.

If you have moved on, you can be sure that if she cares about it, she will find out. And, on top of that, if you don't shove that in her face, the impact will be much harder for her, because she cannot 'respond' to you moving on. Anything she will say about it will show that she hasn't moved on herself. Capisce?
 

Dr.Suave

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What would be the down side of me telling her that I have moved on?
Dont tell her you have moved on. Show her, by not texting her.
 

soulforge

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I have been reading about your situation for many days lately as well as the other members stories on this thread. I was in a situation very similiar to yours in the past. Not my current ex but one that was before her. She had double D's, blonde hair, perfect a**. She was also a bad girl in every sense of the word. The whole relationship was pure excitement and she loved f*cking all the time. I left just like you did. I dated a good woman after her which is my current ex. It was night and day the difference between the two. You made the right move by leaving her for sure. It only would of lead to bad things if you would of stayed with her. You will find someone else that may not be as hot but will brings other things to the table. Just be glad you got to experience with her what you got to do. I am pretty confident you wont be getting back with her cause you have a strong frame.
Yeh man, from literally day one, the situation with her was unstable.

We started off casual initially, she wanted a relationship with me, but random dudes still calling her calling her up. Few incidents when she was irresponsibile with alcohol.

Bratty attitude, challenging behaviour, Sometimes outbursts of anger. Then a couple of times she done some disrespectful things.

She had serious baby rabies, wanted me to have children with her down the line, but I knew she was unstable & just too masculine/agressive to have anything long term with her, so decided to give her the boot.

I knew something was wrong, as I have had several relationships with truly Feminine girls, and the interactions with these feminine girls was nice and easy. No drama, no constant games or agressive outbursts.

It's important that we look for feminine, easy going girls to have relationships with. Not the hot crazy ones, who have past trauma and are emotionally volitile.
 
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