"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Had my 1st 6-way with 5 Russian bisexual acrobat hotties

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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K

KontrollerX

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LOL, you are a 33 degree black belt master and founder of dongfu.

Should it be any real surprise to we mere mortals?
 
D

Dongfu

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Thanks bro's for laughing with me. I wuz expecting some uptight azzholes to say something like, "This is a serious forum for people with serious problems and this post is completely inappropriate."

To thoze azzholes: sorry
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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S

Serialized3

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DOOOOONGGGGGGGGGGG - FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!

*dragon kick*, *monkey punch*
 
D

ducaro

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Excuse me!

This is a serious forum for people with serious problems and this post is completely inappropriate OK!

sorry couldn't resist.. :crackup:
 
A

Ace of Flames

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Everywhere you want to be.... I'm like a Visa card
Not to come across as an uptight azzhole or anything, because I'm all for bringing a little funny into this place, buuuuuut...

This wasn't funny. Sorry. You fail.
 
B

bigjohnson

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"This is a serious forum for people with serious problems and this post is completely inappropriate."


Just for you.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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G

God_of_getting_layed

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Ban This Troll Now!!!!!
 
D

Dongfu

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bigjohnson said:
"This is a serious forum for people with serious problems and this post is completely inappropriate."


Just for you.
Click to expand...
I actually do have a serious problem. I recently converted a lesbian back from the dark side, and now she is completely obsessed with me, stalking me and all. On top of this I have voodoo priestess stalking me and conjuring up all kinds of mischief to stiffle my other attempts with women, and i'm having a little trouble with the religious objection with this hottie from the healthfood store - she doesnt believe in dating, blah blah blah.

HHHHHEEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPPP HELP

DONG FU IS DOWN
 
K

KontrollerX

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Dongfu said:
I actually do have a serious problem. I recently converted a lesbian back from the dark side, and now she is completely obsessed with me, stalking me and all. On top of this I have voodoo priestess stalking me and conjuring up all kinds of mischief to stiffle my other attempts with women, and i'm having a little trouble with the religious objection with this hottie from the healthfood store - she doesnt believe in dating, blah blah blah.

HHHHHEEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPPP HELP

DONG FU IS DOWN
Click to expand...
Master we will pray on the holy mountain to the shaolin gods of dong.

Most assuredly they will aid you in your noble quest!
 
D

Dongfu

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KontrollerX said:
Master we will pray on the holy mountain to the shaolin gods of dong.

Most assuredly they will aid you in your noble quest!
Click to expand...
DONG ON deciple X - The day of redemption is soon at hand. Hail the second coming of the age of Dong.

I will keep the council informed of any further voodoo lesbian intrigue.

Monkey Punch?//
 
Z

zerocelcius

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For some reason I almost expected to see:

Ninja Out.

@ the bottom of this post...:whistle:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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N

nicenomore

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Excuse me!

This is a serious forum for people with serious problems and this post is completely inappropriate OK!

sorry couldn't resist..

lolz.. kidding...
 
R

Randallpink83

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this is a serious forum people.... I mean seriously this post is completely inappropriate... ABSURD!!! ABSURD on both counts... erroneous!!!


...anyone ever go on road trips and buy pringles?
 
D

Dongfu

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Randallpink83 said:
this is a serious forum people.... I mean seriously this post is completely inappropriate... ABSURD!!! ABSURD on both counts... erroneous!!!


...anyone ever go on road trips and buy pringles?
Click to expand...
You mean like . . . pringle berries:confused:
 
S

Serialized3

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I will meet you on the top of Mauna Kea to begin my training in the ancient art of DONG-FU mastery.

*keeeee-yaaaahhhh!*
 
K

KontrollerX

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To conclude tonights council meeting I will recite our orders ancient oath.

"May our dongs be strong and long!"

*Dissappears in a cloud of exploding dong-fu smoke vapor*
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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