She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
In your experience, you would have got some nasty responses with openers like 'wanna ****', but nobody threatened to call the police. What are some of the nasty responses you got? Suppose a woman really does call the police?dbot said:However, if she tells you to get lost and you continue to bother her, that is harassment.
It seemed to be the smartest approach because you are playing a direct number's game. If you are looking for sex, then you are being straight. There is no 'game-playing' or any nonsence to get to that goal.dbot said:The bottom line? Asking a stranger if she wants to fuck is definitely not the smartest approach, but so long as you respect your boundaries, I wouldn't worry too much about any serious legal consequences.
The other poster lives in New York City, USA, which is supposed to be crowded. This means, there is a risk you could get into trouble with the law.dbot said:I also live in Southern California, so don't assume this applies to you if you're living in a small, conservative town in Utah, for example.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
corrector said:The other poster lives in New York City, USA, which is supposed to be crowded. This means, there is a risk you could get into trouble with the law.
Even if you are right -- you are going to tell the cops you all you are doing is asking women out there in public if they want to have sex with you? You could still get charged with loitering and being a public nuisance.
Want to play the numbers game? Try this one:corrector said:It seemed to be the smartest approach because you are playing a direct number's game. If you are looking for sex, then you are being straight. There is no 'game-playing' or any nonsence to get to that goal.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Thank-you dbot.dbot said:Want to play the numbers game? Try this one:
"Hi, what's your name?"
"Rebecca."
"Rebecca, sorry if I'm being rather forward, but I happen to find you extremely attractive. Want to come home with me?"
I'm willing to bet you'll be much more effective saying that as opposed to "hey wanna fuck?" You also won't receive nearly as many negative responses.
As far as negative responses I got when I did this, most women just turned and walked away. A few called me an asshole or something similar. Others laughed or rolled their eyes in a condescending manner.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.