"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
What do you do when a girl you like is not physically available
- Thread starter Dam44
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
In2theGame
Master Don Juan
Let her be until she's around again 100%
BackInTheGame78
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Maybe touch base once a week or every other week and work on meeting and dating other women.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
OldComeBacker
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No. Someone I know but we became physically separated before I made a move
bat soup
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Do you actually know for a fact that she's interested or are you in first stage of the friend zone?
You should always make a move as quickly as possible to avoid situations just like this.
I don't really know TBH but I don't think I'm in the friend one. My university has been closed since March due to COVID and I haven't been texting some at all
bat soup
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Friend zone type 1 is when you don't know where you stand because you didn't make a move.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
StacksHitEmUp
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OldComeBacker
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Then I would say you just have to move on and meet other girls. Should do that regardless, but if it's a girl nothing has ever happened with there's just no point worrying about her. We've all done it, but it's a waste of energy. maybe something will happen down the road, maybe it won't, but pining over her won't help you get her.
Lol, I'm going to change that. I don't just want to be dude that has asked out multiple girls within the same social circle.
I guess the real problem here is I'm not making an effort out of my social circle
r4zorsharp
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How am I messing with her
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
make a move
r4zorsharp
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I'm responding to your title. You said the girl is not physically available.. Your post says something different but either way it sounds like its time to move around man.. stop focusign on this girl you won't even see her for 2-3 months. abundance man.. abundance... theres girls id ont talk to for more than that long, and i don't even worry what they're thinking.. im focused on me and what i got going on
Yeah, I would but not online
Alright, I get it now
bat soup
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It's better than being the guy that hasn't asked them out and is stuck in the friend zone.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.