TheVirtualMind
Master Don Juan
Sosuave really wasn't a thing of his past.Atom Smasher said:Nope, not him.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Sosuave really wasn't a thing of his past.Atom Smasher said:Nope, not him.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
So what's the rule? After you get banned how long do you have to stay away before you can make another name? 2 months, 3 months? I wouldn't know I have never been banned in my life from any site.Atom Smasher said:Ah, but it IS a thing of BeHappy's past.
BeHappy's meteoric rise and tragic fall was quite the spectacle.
Atom Smasher said:BeHappy was banned because he is a duplicate account of someone who said he was going to leave but actually didn't leave.
In regard to your specific question, we take it case-by-case. We have always been pretty lenient in allowing banned members to come back fairly quickly. I've seen several come back within a month. Look at Ninja. We allowed him back multiple times but he always fell back into nonsensical trolling.
If a guy is extremely belligerent and/or deemed obviously harmful to the site, we will be less likely to allow a quick comeback. Every case is different.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
People like to feel missed, so when they make these threads stating they are leaving, they secretly hope hordes of people will beg them to stay. When in reality nobody gives a damn. It's like when you leave a job, you never existed. Nobody gives a damn.adam225 said:I don't understand this mentality behind leaving a website/forum. People go on like they're leaving some kind of club or something that requires a 40 minute drive to get to. All you need to do is pickup your smart phone and type the web address in.
If you don't fancy posting up then don't. Times change, what was yesterday isn't today. No one can change anything by simply giving up. Either push for what you believe in or don't. :crazy:
Then they come back under a new name.Malice said:People like to feel missed, so when they make these threads stating they are leaving, they secretly hope hordes of people will beg them to stay. When in reality nobody gives a damn. It's like when you leave a job, you never existed. Nobody gives a damn.
Oh re-lax, I haven't abandoned Sosuave and I never will. Being a blog and book author demands a lot of my time, but I haven't forsaken SS.Pook, Rollo, we summon thee...
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.