Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Does anyone here believe pair bonding for life is possible in the current climate?

Jager

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Very good post. I’ll read this several times. It’s like the whole site explained in an eloquent way.



This has happened to me and I didn’t even realize it. It’s still around but I’m trying to get away from it.
There’s always one thing missing and she always brings it up. Sometimes even comparing overtly to an ex.

So, when a man starts to become his own man again.. you say one last ditch effort to wheel him back in.. what if he still doesn’t serve or entertain her thoughts or needs?
Will she lose interest and walk away or will she become submissive to the man, like she is deeply desiring to do?
Because obviously she doesn’t want a man to playcate to her, as she doesn’t truly respect that.
Some are too gone for it. It’s a real phenomenon for women. I don’t remember where I got the quote from, but here it is:

“A woman, left to her own devices, will inevitably destroy herself.”

Taught girl power and “I don’t need no man,” she’ll sleep her way to doom. Some of the guys on here talking about going for younger women have a really good point, and it isn’t lip service or conjecture. That’s experience talking. If a woman continues to behave as she does, she will eventually destroy her own psyche. At that point, it doesn’t matter how strong the man’s frame is.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Will she lose interest and walk away or will she become submissive to the man, like she is deeply desiring to do?
In my case, she left. But I hope you aren't asking in order to avoid doing what you should do out of fear you'll lose her, because if it does cause her to leave, then that is what needs to happen.

To illustrate an example of what happened to me, that played out exactly as @stormrider described:
My ex-wife was enamored with me at first. She stroked my ego, wanted to see me all the time, complimented me, wanted to have s*x constantly and talked about how much she loved it, bragged about me to her parents, friends, and family that I was the best guy she had ever dated. It lasted a long time like this.... nearly a year. Then it started going down-hill. She was a VERY unhappy person, in life. Always complaining about her friends, her job, her family, her anxiety, what happened in traffic, what happened at the grocery store, etc.

She then began aiming the complaining at me. At first, it was in response to my expressing dissatisfaction with what she was NOT bringing to the table (literally this was limited only to: doing her share of house-work, contributing financially, and taking care not to damage my belongings that she couldn't afford to replace - seems like a lot right?!) I wasn't allowed to be disappointed in her and she fought me furiously. Then she began to make up gripes about me. "You aren't vulnerable." "You aren't emotionally available." "You don't this you don't do that," "you make all the decisions," "you always put your foot down." I didn't understand what she really wanted and when I asked her to explain it, she couldn't. So, I got us into couples therapy.

Couples therapy consisted of me sitting there mostly quietly while she complained about me for an hour. When he asked her specifically what it was she wanted that I wasn't doing, she responded, "I don't know, I can't put my finger on it..... it's just.... just....... SOMETHING." The therapist responded, "Hey, I believe you, but if you can't tell him exactly what you want, you can't expect him to do it." So he then told us to get two white boards on the way home, she would create a list of things she wanted from me, and I'd create a list of things I wanted from her.

Mine read as follows:
1. Do your half of the chores
2. Contribute the $X per month toward bills/budget that we agreed upon without excuses
3. Take care of the belongings we use which you cannot afford to replace if you damage them

I still have hers in the attic. She ran out of space within minutes. It was stuff like "hold my hand when walking into the grocery store," "when I come home, listen to me vent about my day for 15 minutes with your undivided attention," "Every day, tell me 3 things you love about me," "leave me a love note" etc.

I actually did all the things. The next week in counseling the counselor asked her how it went. She said poorly. I was surprised, since I did all the things. I responded, explaining I did everything on her board. He looked at her and asked, "Well, did he do everything on your board?" She said, "Yes." He asked, "So why are you unsatisfied?" She responded in an angry huff, "Because he only did them because they were on the board." And that was when I knew I could never fill the black hole void in her soul. But I lied to myself for another painful year or so as things continued to decline into depression and misery. Then one day, she gave me the greatest gift and simply didn't come home from work. It was really hard, but I've come out of it a better man than I ever was and am still on the journey of continued improvement.
 

Brooks

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Why don't you play it out. Look at it as a learning experience. Grab your balls and stand your ground as a man and see how it ends up. The opportunity to see it play out is front of you, there's no need to ask a random guy on the internet.
I’m asking your experience with this is all since you had a brilliantly cogent summation of your thoughts just laid out.

I will play it out for myself. Because I know what has not worked so far. So only way to go is in the opposing direction.
 

daproest1

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It's extremely difficult, and you're going to have to make a lot of sacrifices and purge a lot of the things you think you've learned about women. Here's a few things about the woman you will pair-bond for life with

- She is most likely NOT in any age bracket above age 23
- She is NOT a better woman because of her past experiences and failures
- She does NOT need a knight in shining armour to form a family with her and any of her bastard children
- Older does NOT mean she's more mature
- A good career does NOT equal a good woman
- She will likely be terrible in bed because she has NOT slept with a lot of men.

So how many women does that leave you with? Not a whole hell of a lot, and women who pass through a filter like this may still be lousy choices.
I had one. Met all of those. But I fvcked it up. She left 6 years later.
 

Brooks

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Your question is disingenuous because you want me to help you get a positive reaction out of her instead of owning yourself based on principle and self-respect. And I will not help you do that.
That’s actually not true at all. I thought your post was very articulate and spot on. I asked your thoughts because what you stated is the direction I need and desire to head to. And so it would make sense I would ask for your perspective and guidance in dealing with that.
That’s the whole point of a forum geared to sharing information and helping people who are less aware
 

Jager

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That’s actually not true at all. I thought your post was very articulate and spot on. I asked your thoughts because what you stated is the direction I need and desire to head to. And so it would make sense I would ask for your perspective and guidance in dealing with that.
That’s the whole point of a forum geared to sharing information and helping people who are less aware
The point he was making was that you need to observe what’s happening around you. Just observing. It’s a good lesson. That’s how you get out of the sh!t. In my case, for instance, I read books and scoured material for information, then I compared it to what was happening around me. He’s saying that, and stop doing it for approval or validation.

EDIT: Especially for the approval and validation of women.
 

ubercat

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@oldmanofthesea you LL find some of my posts and replies r on that line in ltrs. Also look at Motu and backbreaker. I also always recommend practical female psychology for the practical man ebook. Red pill book by guys who actually like woman and have gotten past the rage stage. Marmel repped it too. I've got no issue with the frame jihadis here. Dominance is one way to manage a woman in the short term. I take issue with them telling other men how to live their lives. Everyone has to be there own man and get comfortable in your own skin.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Op, in terms of possibility, yes its possible. Its possible to win the lottery. Its possible to build a business bigger than apple or Google. Its possible to mske it to the nba. The likelihood is low.

Theres a disconnect between men and women in 2019. Its about to get worse in the coming election year especially in western society particularly America. Bets are hedged. If trump eins or bettee put, when he does it is female victimhood on steroids. If he loses its girl power and empowerment rubbish. The promos are going to make you puke. The amplifier in social engineering, the man hating, body positivity, girl power slut gonna slut and single mom promos are going off the rails.

The train is coming off the track. The crash is coming. So be it. I'll be ok. No harm. No foul. Sleep not lost. Daddy government and the welfare state, the promo of free money will end. The wars will kick off. A zombie apocalypse or plague. Something like this or the grid coming down. A ice age or something else will hit. Women will need man again.

Fellas, zero ****s given. I wont be there to plsy super hero. Not my problem. Op, automation is affection 99% men. The fallout will be women working because they have to be since men won't or cannot. Peterson is pointing out that now in past lectures. I have heard that old adage that the biggest fights between couples are money. The translation being female hypergamy not optimised Chris Rock joked about it in the 90s before his divorce.

Men know but are stupid and they follow the beaten path. They know it. I cold approach on the regular. Its constant output. On terms of pace, its always 110%! In terms of reciprocity, the fire i bring, its rarely matched in terms of counter-balance. Someone awe-inspiring. Feminine, submissive, dtf and on the early side of 20. My game is stupid tight and bang on. A decade of pickup will do that. Even then, the knowledge of the following is not lost on me. The lack in reciprocity is why women are fat, low sex drive, and its star fish sex for hubby.

Adaptation is required. Bachelor lifestyle is goat status. Its the era. Live at your edge. Yes, approach but, its not much more than a lease. It has a time-limit. If there's enough fire and reciprocity, let it ride playboy.

Check Power vs Force D. R. Hawking. The growing amount of men on that scale more now a days then ever before in history. The lowest level is 'shame', a tactic women use. Indicative of th3 frequency and level of consciousness or lack thereof. Sadly, men are marrying that.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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There is no more sinister of a trap than a marriage. It is a hack to invade and manipulate a man's biology.
It once served a purpose to protect property. Now, men become her property and the courts now use common law living meaning no cohabitation. AJ 21 con did private marriage. It is dangerous pending the state you live in.

The adaptation is a disregard of the old social order and contract. The reason for the change being that women deem her having to bring nothing to the LTR and her checking out with cash and prizes.

The next stage is to run perma dread game. As in, new girls are turning 18 everyday. The sec, not in the mood, LMR and low sex drive means #next! Its diff if she's sick or her mom died. Its just not acceptable now or ever again so I'm getting mine with her or not. It shouldn't be explained but demonstrated by actions.
 

Trump

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The problem with most guys is they go off into the world seeking female validation from the 90% that doesn't give a damn about them. This could lead to wasted years of "self improvement" for validation and not because it's coming from their inner masculine core. Guys usually become disillusioned at best, and at worse they could end up wasting an entire decade chasing after female validation.

This is essentially what the red pill is. It's to tell men that those love songs are making them sappy cucks and they need to man up and discover some masculine purpose instead of being a fvckboy.
I would say red pill is just living on your own terms.


Guys don’t care about female validation, guys care about women not screwing them over because they have so many options available. And with the system behind them, the guy is screwed if she cares enough to ruin him. Angelina Jolie anyone?

It’s a double edged sword. Women complain there are no real “men” out there, but still want the option to screw the men over whenever they like. That’s why Keanu Reeves never touches women in photos, he is afraid of getting sued. #Metoo movement anyone? Cuba Gooding Jr is getting sued because he touched a girl at night club. You don’t think the girl set him up?

I’m literally afraid to bring girls to my home because if they see it, they may go home and ask their boyfriends to hurt them and cry rape and sue me. You won’t believe how fast the system backs up any girl in North America.

But I guess giving women Power keeps men subservient to the system. Instead of challenging the powers that be, their banks accounts and status quo, you have to worry your wife won’t sue you at anytime.

And they call this the American Dream.
 

AttackFormation

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This thread is a case in point of why I'm coming on SS less these days. Probably half of the people posting in this thread were on my ignore list, which grew longer. Just a circlejerk of guys who are off their medication spouting what even I recognize as narcissistic misogyny, trying to make others as negative and interpersonally repulsive as themselves. You can call me a white knight cuck if you want, I'm still gonna say I don't like this turn of saying women have no "soul", women are good for smiling, nodding and sucking while being your maid, cook, nanny and masseuse, women are only "emotional" while you the great man are "rational", women are worthless trash compared to you, and bla bla bla bla.

These trash posters are exactly what the media would focus on if in theory it ever did a report on SS. They drag our image and more importantly our atmosphere down.
 
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Jager

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This thread is a case in point of why I'm coming on SS less these days. Probably half of the people posting in this thread were on my ignore list, which grew longer. Just a circlejerk of guys who are off their medication spouting what even I recognize as narcissistic misogyny, trying to make others as negative and interpersonally repulsive as themselves. You can call me a white knight cuck if you want, I'm still gonna say I don't like this turn of saying women have no "soul", women are good for smiling, nodding and sucking while being your maid, cook, nanny and masseuse, women are only "emotional" while you the great man are "rational", women are worthless trash compared to you, and bla bla bla bla.

These trash posters are exactly what the media would focus on if in theory it ever did a report on SS. They drag our image and more importantly our atmosphere down.
I came here to unplug from the matrix. By all means, stay there if you like. I won’t stop you.
 

Spaz

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I came here to unplug from the matrix. By all means, stay there if you like. I won’t stop you.
I'm at the top of his list because I called him a virgin.

So far I've only ever said it to 3 men here because they all are virgins.
 

Jager

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I'm at the top of his list because I called him a virgin.

So far I've only ever said it to 3 men here because they all are virgins.
He’s got no position of authority, then. Dilbert.
 
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Pandora

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Only cucks and betas do.

The Bhagavad Gita: "Out of the corruption of women proceeds the corruption of races; out of the corruption of races, the loss of memory; out of the loss of memory, the loss of understanding, and out of this all evil."
The Bhagavad Gita is the holy text to the oldest known religion ever which is ancient Hinduism. I hold ancient Hindu teaching in high regard. This quote is serious. If its in the Bhagavad Gita then it Is probably true to a large extent. Its funny how Christian mythology has its first book illustrating this concept. Eve representing woman is corrupted and thus messes up the world for everyone.

I don't think women are inherently evil. Women in their purest form are divinely feminine. God or Source may be a feminine energy. The feminine as experienced with our mothers is unconditional love. When women are corrupted though they are corrupted hard. The powers that be know that corruption of women is the key to corrupting everything. Thanks for that quote.
 

Epic Days

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I'm at the top of his list because I called him a virgin.

So far I've only ever said it to 3 men here because they all are virgins.
Oh come now spaz. We need all types of men. We need certain types to marry a lot of these rhinos and tubas, marry the over used single moms who squandered their youth and still want mr. wonderful.
Marry those 40 & 50 year old, heavily used c0ck receptacles.

We have to somehow get a way to get these leaches off the government nipple.
 

Pandora

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@Epic Days hey bro no need to get so triggered everyones entitled to their opinion

The difference between you and I is I have faith that things will always workout in the end. At the end of the day this physical realm isnt my priority. I have higher aspirations for the afterlife so whatever happens in this world even if I get fked over to the 1000th degree I know that as long as I am true of heart in my faith and belief with God and do the right thing then I will be fine. Thats why I really DGAF about the negative possibilities that can happen. thats life. ive witness miracles and seemingly impossible instances happen and not by simple happenstance but by cosmic design and influence not coincidence. i also believe you manifest your failures often times as well. and at the end of the day like i said nothing is guaranteed. id rather look at the glass as half full not half empty.
Broski I think you are being a little idealistic. No one is disagreeing with your sentiment. We are just saying that in modern day America that the ideal is not likely. The ideal was never ever real. Pologamy Is probably the way men are women were naturally supposed to cohabitant. Marriage to one woman is a modern invention. Tribal cultures (where we originated from) don't do the monogamous marriage thing. It doesn't work. Even in the 1950s'-1960's it was a charade.
 

Spaz

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Oh come now spaz. We need all types of men. We need certain types to marry a lot of these rhinos and tubas, marry the over used single moms who squandered their youth and still want mr. wonderful.
Marry those 40 & 50 year old, heavily used c0ck receptacles.

We have to somehow get a way to get these leaches off the government nipple.
They claim red pill to the maxed.

Prolly has read every book imaginable on the subject and worse, are able to quote every single passage but doesn't live the life.

Welcome to living within the feminine imperative matrix, manipulated to think u r red pill when the reality is that u r still very much a virgin or with incredibly low lay count.
 

AttackFormation

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Broski I think you are being a little idealistic. No one is disagreeing with your sentiment. We are just saying that in modern day America that the ideal is not likely. The ideal was never ever real. Pologamy Is probably the way men are women were naturally supposed to cohabitant. Marriage to one woman is a modern invention. Tribal cultures (where we originated from) don't do the monogamous marriage thing. It doesn't work. Even in the 1950s'-1960's it was a charade.
The problem is that in our current civilization we are looking for one solution that fits everyone when the key could be a multitude of setups. Some are polyamorous, some are monogamous, some are noncommittal (and some have predatory personality disorders). Some raise their children in their own household, others raise children in a group and extended family setting where knowing parentage may or may not be of importance, others don't want children. But in our civilization we are only set up to live one way. This makes as much sense as making everyone play only one sport, only one art and only one music genre.
 
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