I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
that's based on your presupposition of timelinesIn Tralfamadorian philosophy, when a person dies they only appear to die. They are alive in other moments in the past. They may be in bad condition upon the moment of death, but they are doing great in other moments.
There is only one timeline presupposed and one is able to move along the timeline in either direction freely at will. All time points are observed simultaneously, like a range of mountains on the horizon. So when an Earthling is captured and taken to the planetary zoo, they are also still alive and happy at other points in their existence and so as captors, the Tralfamadorians don't feel any guilt.that's based on your presupposition of timelines
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
that's eternalism but I take the position of philosophical presentismThere is only one timeline presupposed and one is able to move along the timeline in either direction freely at will. All time points are observed simultaneously, like a range of mountains on the horizon. So when an Earthling is captured and taken to the planetary zoo, they are also still alive and happy at other points in their existence and so as captors, the Tralfamadorians don't feel any guilt.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
People only look forward to death because their life is miserable. I’m enjoying my time here and don’t want it to end.Observing my family elders over the years (4 grands and 3 great-grands still lived when i was young), i came to conclusion, the older you get, the less you worry about death. In some cases, people are even fed up enough at life, they look forward to death.
So, instead of worrying about death, you should think about how to make the next 30 years of your life count.
Decide what you consider to be a "worthy" life, write it down and focus on achieving it.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I m in 50s. Holding down a high pressure job in a major bank. Beat a tennis player in his 20s last night. On top of the Mrs as much as she can handle. I agree on 60s by then nobody wants you.Nope or at least not that much...what scares the **** out of me is getting old.
Losing strenght and potential while slowling becoming a dead weight for those around me.
Lets be honest, all those "men peak in their 50s" lines are pure bullsh1t, your 70s will suck and your 80s even more.
I suppose we all are. I heard Kevin Samuels talk about a man placing parameters around what he holds most precious to him (family, wife, kids etc). Ones willingness to go out on his ****ing shield.I am terrified of death. The thought of not existing scares me unlike anything else.
I watched a Ram Dass doc. I later learned he died shortly after. He lost most of his health and mobility. he had a terrible stroke. The guy looked high on life. If enlightenment was a real thing, I think he found it. I'm sure living out your days like this is terrifying and yet this guy owned it. I am working on enjoying the moment yet making moves. It's not easy.I used to... in my teens and early 20’s the world was amazing and possibilities are endless. The thought of leaving terrified me... at 40 things narrow and doors start to close. I am sure as I get older and older... friends will pass on, energy will fade, strength will decline and all that’s eventually left is the memories of what was.... so when that comes I will look forward to leaving my meat suit and progressing to my next story. Already there are so many souls I cannot wait to see again even if it might be brief. For now... making those memories to carry me thru my old Age is important.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.