Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
that's based on your presupposition of timelinesIn Tralfamadorian philosophy, when a person dies they only appear to die. They are alive in other moments in the past. They may be in bad condition upon the moment of death, but they are doing great in other moments.
There is only one timeline presupposed and one is able to move along the timeline in either direction freely at will. All time points are observed simultaneously, like a range of mountains on the horizon. So when an Earthling is captured and taken to the planetary zoo, they are also still alive and happy at other points in their existence and so as captors, the Tralfamadorians don't feel any guilt.that's based on your presupposition of timelines
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
that's eternalism but I take the position of philosophical presentismThere is only one timeline presupposed and one is able to move along the timeline in either direction freely at will. All time points are observed simultaneously, like a range of mountains on the horizon. So when an Earthling is captured and taken to the planetary zoo, they are also still alive and happy at other points in their existence and so as captors, the Tralfamadorians don't feel any guilt.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
People only look forward to death because their life is miserable. I’m enjoying my time here and don’t want it to end.Observing my family elders over the years (4 grands and 3 great-grands still lived when i was young), i came to conclusion, the older you get, the less you worry about death. In some cases, people are even fed up enough at life, they look forward to death.
So, instead of worrying about death, you should think about how to make the next 30 years of your life count.
Decide what you consider to be a "worthy" life, write it down and focus on achieving it.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I m in 50s. Holding down a high pressure job in a major bank. Beat a tennis player in his 20s last night. On top of the Mrs as much as she can handle. I agree on 60s by then nobody wants you.Nope or at least not that much...what scares the **** out of me is getting old.
Losing strenght and potential while slowling becoming a dead weight for those around me.
Lets be honest, all those "men peak in their 50s" lines are pure bullsh1t, your 70s will suck and your 80s even more.
I suppose we all are. I heard Kevin Samuels talk about a man placing parameters around what he holds most precious to him (family, wife, kids etc). Ones willingness to go out on his ****ing shield.I am terrified of death. The thought of not existing scares me unlike anything else.
I watched a Ram Dass doc. I later learned he died shortly after. He lost most of his health and mobility. he had a terrible stroke. The guy looked high on life. If enlightenment was a real thing, I think he found it. I'm sure living out your days like this is terrifying and yet this guy owned it. I am working on enjoying the moment yet making moves. It's not easy.I used to... in my teens and early 20’s the world was amazing and possibilities are endless. The thought of leaving terrified me... at 40 things narrow and doors start to close. I am sure as I get older and older... friends will pass on, energy will fade, strength will decline and all that’s eventually left is the memories of what was.... so when that comes I will look forward to leaving my meat suit and progressing to my next story. Already there are so many souls I cannot wait to see again even if it might be brief. For now... making those memories to carry me thru my old Age is important.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.