Thanks for responding guys! It definitely helps to hear other people's perspective and to know that others are reading my journal keeps me honest.
Reflecting on my last post some more... I think what hit me the hardest about club vs street approaching is what happened last weekend. I went out-of-state and was in sarge mode with a friend who is always down to holler and get numbers. Over the 4-days we were out of town, I have no idea how many approaches I did, but I got about 16 numbers in total. Two of the numbers were from street approaches and the rest were club approaches. As it turns out, the two street approaches were down to meet up while the fourteen club approaches all flaked one way or another. It isn't that the women are lower quality at the club, it is more that there is a lot more competition, everyone you meet kind of meshes together the next morning because of the alcohol, and people just don't take club interactions seriously if we're being honest.
These last few days, with regards to being on the hunt, it had started to feel a bit futile and meaningless. Thanks to typing things out and reflecting on my experiences, I realize that this is because I experienced a lot of flakes last week and, more importantly, because my game was on auto-pilot with no-one actually steering the ship. There are positive dating traits that I thought I internalized when I had the hot hand on the dating scene, but as rust started to develop recently, I feel like a handful of my positive subconscious habits have gone out the window. Things like pushing for kino, taking the convo sexual, displaying intent, heavy eye contact, talking with a purpose, etc. These are things that I used to do on a regular basis but after neglect, my game is relying too heavily on alcohol.
But, as they say, knowing is half the battle so I am already better today than I was when I started the week. My thoughts were a little defeatist earlier in the week but looking at the chicks I smashed over the last few months (and in general) and I am proud of what I've accomplished dating-wise and I know that a lot of guys would be jealous. Today, I remembered that there will be times I strike out and instead of getting upset, I need to focus more on fundamentals.
Yesterday wasn't one of those days lol. I went out drinking with some friends and then we all went to the club together. Looking back, my interactions reinforced that I really didn't have a plan at the club. I was grinding on women, but my heart wasn't in it (
read: my **** wasn't getting hard) and so women were losing interest after a minute or so. I am an OK dancer nowadays but it is not my strong suite and I had no plan to escalate kino or to isolate and transition to trying to take her home. I need to play to my strengths and put myself in positions to be successful.
Conversing is where I am better than average when it comes to dating, but last night, of the few conversations I had, I literally ran out of things to say lol. I am not accustomed to that. Reflecting on last night served as a reminder that everything I say/do should be moving me towards my end goals (attraction and/or ****ing). I grabbed two numbers last night but I think one is a lesbian and the other didn't respond to my text and leaves the city tomorrow. Not great outcomes, but lots of experience points gained by analyzing myself so I'm happy.
Goals
- Review my notes: Ironically, I have been here, spinning my wheels, before. I got out of it last time and I can do it again. Here are the notes from my old journal the last time this occurred. I have pre-made objectives to get myself back on track. I will re-read these notes and let them bounce around in my head until it seeps into my subconscious.
- Become more in-tune to the idea of smashing on the same night: I actually smashed the same night like 3 weeks ago but because my game has been all over the place lately, the possibility of it happening has started to feel foreign and random. Aint sh!t random. I control the probability of sex based on my actions and reactions.
- Become more aware of the idea of cold approaching: On a related note, I don't even acknowledge the possibility of approaching during the day right now I feel like. I need to be conscious of my surroundings and think of openers and ways to approach constantly.
