Just got a call that I din't pick up.
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)
- Thread starter Daydream Engineer
- Start date
Just got a call that I din't pick up.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
It would have been NC-Day approx. #184 if I wasn't so weakly "romantic"?
Valuable lessons.
+ another #62 days or so from first dumping mid July.
I'm embarassed.
But ready to admit it here, thanks for reading.
That's a lot of healing I've missed out on. You can't unread the encouraging, logical words of the forum members who helped me last summer. I was too stubborn and loyal to try keeping my word and let's face it, horrified to be alone again....but those words of advice are helping me now stay firm.
I would have regretted not trying....I literally promised I would keep trying at the first consummation.
Which, doesn't make sense....obviously it wasn't reaaaallllyy natural attraction from the beginning but rather a settling because of each other's extreme loneliness.
Awwwww.
Please help me if he contacts me first, he probably won't but then, I posted in this thread again, just in case.
Rawksteddy
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2019
- Messages
- 47
- Reaction score
- 24
- Age
- 34
Day 1 no contact. Hard to get out into self improvement when the whole world is shut down because of corona virus. Fortunately I have a full gym at my work that I can go use. Hooked up a date for later this afternoon on OLD. Cute Latina girl, hopefully she looks like her pictures.
Need to move on as quickly as possible from the ex and stop her from manipulating me into thinking I’m in the wrong or sucking me back in. Not sure how everything with her turned into such a confusing heap. But I don’t want to waste anymore time.
Need to move on as quickly as possible from the ex and stop her from manipulating me into thinking I’m in the wrong or sucking me back in. Not sure how everything with her turned into such a confusing heap. But I don’t want to waste anymore time.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Delete. Block. That is how you deal with it. She is saying that out of ego. She is pulling a power trip because she see's herself in a position of power over you. Giving you a deadline is saying "im in charge. I say jump you say how high."
Here is how you handle her ultimatium
Her "You have until tonight to text or call me, if you don't there is no coming back."
You. Shrug. <delete. Block> zero reply. Next.
If you had problems with this guy before and broke up twice before and this is break up 3. Why would you bother entertaining any contact from him a 4th time? Next. Go meet new guys. Believe it or not it is MUCH easier foe women. Move on
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Rawksteddy
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2019
- Messages
- 47
- Reaction score
- 24
- Age
- 34
Day 6 no contact. Apparently there’s a global pandemic which makes dating really hard right now lol. Also working out. But I’m still working! I’m chatting up a few girls right now from old. Going to need to start an at home workout plan here within the next few days. I’m going to have an entire week off work! Anyway. Y’all have a goodnight.
just wrote, then backspaced a post...feel better.
Healing.....
Change subject....
Sports: Looks like we're not sending athletes to the Olympics for summer games.
Weather: It's been sunny lately and spring has sprung.
Ignore
This was predictable. These type messages ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS come after the “ultimatum” message.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Whenever a chick gives you an ultimatium you give them the boot. Always. No exceptions. Here is why.
1. She isnt being flexable
2. She is deliberately pushing the boundaries you set.
3. She is trying to lead and relationships always fail when the woman tries to lead.
When the put a deadline or ultimatum on you you terminate immediately.
Day 20
I Was the dumper although i felt like i was forced to do due to her total disrespect and crap behaviour and gaslighting towards me.
I could feel a break up coming and I'd just had enough and thought i would stand up and be a man and end it myself because i just wanted out because that anxiety leading up to a break up is horrible and i just wanted it to end. Im feeling better now, no anxiety, sleeping better, working out as best i can especially since all the gyms here in Australia are in lockdown.
I still miss her and eventually one day down the track i would like to be on friendly terms with her but i couldn't atm because i still have attachment to outcome of how the conversation might go. It was defitnley a Peaceful breakup. But until the pain has totally left, i wouldn't even entertain the idea of talking to her because the attachment to the outcome is too great. Still haven't heard from her.
I Was the dumper although i felt like i was forced to do due to her total disrespect and crap behaviour and gaslighting towards me.
I could feel a break up coming and I'd just had enough and thought i would stand up and be a man and end it myself because i just wanted out because that anxiety leading up to a break up is horrible and i just wanted it to end. Im feeling better now, no anxiety, sleeping better, working out as best i can especially since all the gyms here in Australia are in lockdown.
I still miss her and eventually one day down the track i would like to be on friendly terms with her but i couldn't atm because i still have attachment to outcome of how the conversation might go. It was defitnley a Peaceful breakup. But until the pain has totally left, i wouldn't even entertain the idea of talking to her because the attachment to the outcome is too great. Still haven't heard from her.
Nearly eight months of no contact and I got a whatsapp msg from her two hours ago regarding mail for me that came to my old address (we were living together, she's still there). Strange, when mail for me arrived in the last months her sister contacted me.
This happens just as I got her finally out of my mind and met someone I really like...
This happens just as I got her finally out of my mind and met someone I really like...
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bcude
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 31, 2019
- Messages
- 762
- Reaction score
- 1,219
- Age
- 44
Such a classic, exactly when you let go for realz they somehow smell it and dip the toe in the water to see how you're doing.
I didn't but thought about because I don't know if there's mail for real...
I let her sister send me my mail and transfered the porto when something arrived there the last months.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.