Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
So your belief is current social programming is making it nearly impossible to have a good relationship?badboyjmm said:I would have no problem with being in a LTR but the chick, because of social programming, will probably have an issue.
Precisely.Harry Wilmington said:All that to say: her giving it up on the first date shouldn't deter any man from being with a woman long-term. Plus, isn't that backwards thinking? If she's giving it up the first night, that means YOU are doing the same thing! #nohypocrisy
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
It a weird thing. In my experience, the girls had issues with the fact that we hook up on the first date. For that reason, I never was able to meet a girl after we hook up so quickly.mrgoodstuff said:So your belief is current social programming is making it nearly impossible to have a good relationship?
Never thought about it that way.
Good post. And I agree, one has to look at the entire package.Harry Wilmington said:...yeah - sorry, but you're asking the wrong question.
Realistically, you wouldn't know if the woman was someone you wanted to marry until you've dated them for a while - and even THEN, you could be wrong.
I had a buddy from college who was a virgin when he got married, to a woman who was also a virgin. 2.5 years and 1 kid later, they got divorced. So, despite her not giving it up on the first night - or at all during their relationship - it wasn't able to work out for reasons outside of sex (although sex - or lack thereof - also played a factor).
Meanwhile, there are women who have been married 20+ years to a guy whom they had sex with on a first date. You have to remember, when dealing with people there are more factors involved in determining what makes a "good woman" beyond her first night activities. There are also numerous reasons as to why a woman would give it up on the first night that don't involve her being a slvt. Maybe it was a year since she had any and she thought you looked attractive. Maybe she didn't plan to have sex with you, but the way you acted that night was so smooth that she went along with YOUR advanced moves when you started making them. Heck, maybe she WAS a slvt and thought you'd be another notch on her belt, and it turned out she felt a genuine connection with you that lasted long-term.
All that to say: her giving it up on the first date shouldn't deter any man from being with a woman long-term. Plus, isn't that backwards thinking? If she's giving it up the first night, that means YOU are doing the same thing! #nohypocrisy