She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Yea I did. The OP asked if you should get with a girl with kids.Kerpal said:That didn't answer the question.
Attraction isn't a choice. Attraction never changes. What does change are motivational priorities—like a girl getting knocked up by the strong dominant male and then finding a beta provider, or the other way around with cuckoldry. The whole notion of girls finally "realizing" through "maturity" in their mid-twenties they like nice guys is a canard.elite7:
Do you think people can change.
Go young.Kerpal:
I'd like to say no, but what happens when you get older and most women have gone thru their marriage/kids/divorce phase?
Well, that's a good question. I could do it without much problem but I don't.Kerpal said:I was talking about MY question. It's easy to say "No, go younger", but how many guys are actually pulling this off?
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
It helps to still be relatively youthful / in shape, dress young, and have good game. Granted, most balk at the idea but about 1 out of 5 can be persuaded.Kerpal said:Again, easier said than done. Every older guy is trying to do this, how do you pull it off unless you're at the top of the pyramid?
I think this is the crux of this whole thread, and leads to some confusion...Drdeee said:I'd date a girl with kids and make her my fak buddy but wouldn't get into anything serious with her.
A girl that is 22 with 2 kids you have to understand is not a good catch, and she probably is looking for something serious, preferably with a guy who has a lot of cash..
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Even the widows?Desdinova said:All single mothers are NOT relationship material.
Solomon said:Even the widows?
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.