You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Yea I did. The OP asked if you should get with a girl with kids.Kerpal said:That didn't answer the question.
Attraction isn't a choice. Attraction never changes. What does change are motivational priorities—like a girl getting knocked up by the strong dominant male and then finding a beta provider, or the other way around with cuckoldry. The whole notion of girls finally "realizing" through "maturity" in their mid-twenties they like nice guys is a canard.elite7:
Do you think people can change.
Go young.Kerpal:
I'd like to say no, but what happens when you get older and most women have gone thru their marriage/kids/divorce phase?
Well, that's a good question. I could do it without much problem but I don't.Kerpal said:I was talking about MY question. It's easy to say "No, go younger", but how many guys are actually pulling this off?
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
It helps to still be relatively youthful / in shape, dress young, and have good game. Granted, most balk at the idea but about 1 out of 5 can be persuaded.Kerpal said:Again, easier said than done. Every older guy is trying to do this, how do you pull it off unless you're at the top of the pyramid?
I think this is the crux of this whole thread, and leads to some confusion...Drdeee said:I'd date a girl with kids and make her my fak buddy but wouldn't get into anything serious with her.
A girl that is 22 with 2 kids you have to understand is not a good catch, and she probably is looking for something serious, preferably with a guy who has a lot of cash..
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Even the widows?Desdinova said:All single mothers are NOT relationship material.
Solomon said:Even the widows?
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.