"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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*** Who Is Your Fave Comedian ? ***

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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KarmaSutra

KarmaSutra

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Sam Kinison taught me everything I needed to know about life and interacting with women.

"You lying wh0re! You used me, you never loved me! I hope you slide uder a gas truck and taste your own blood. I want my records back, I WANT MY RECORDS BACK!"

I cried like a baby when he was taken away.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Rollo Tomassi

Rollo Tomassi

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Mitch Hedberg and Robin Harris - both dead now.
 
Jariel

Jariel

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Peter Kay because I can relate to everything he says.

Jim Gaffigan and Ricky Gervais follow closely behind.
 
S

shaunuk

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Lee Evans and Roy Chubby Brown are really good British comedians. As is Peter Kay like Jariel said but I find Peter's humour a bit too clean to be my favourite :)

-shaun
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Victory Unlimited

Victory Unlimited

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Chris Rock: Because his standup routines are funny as hell, AND they always speak truths to the human condition at the same time.

and EQUALLY my favorite:

Rodney Dangerfield: Because just his comedic presence on stage can make you laugh long before he even opens his mouth. That guy oozed comedy from every pore...and his rapid fire "one liner" deliveries were always on point.

May he rest in peace...
 
F

Francisco d'Anconia

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Victory Unlimited said:
Chris Rock: Because his standup routines are funny as hell, AND they always speak truths to the human condition at the same time...
Click to expand...
+1 for Chris plus surprisingly, similar on the female side, Kathy Griffin is hillarious in person.
 
R

Rebound Material

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Rollo Tomassi said:
Mitch Hedberg and Robin Harris - both dead now.
Click to expand...
Im with you on Mitch Hedberg. His delivery is one of a kind.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I

i am me

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dane cook was the **** before he became a myspace ***** haha

mitch hedberg, chris rock and dave chappelle are all good...i like alotta random comedians on comedy central too but i cant remember their names
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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