Charm&Style
Master Don Juan
i personally think russel peters is HAAALLARRIOUS
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
*** Who Is Your Fave Comedian ? ***
- Thread starter Charm&Style
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"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
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David Cross or George Carlin.
KarmaSutra
Banned
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- Oct 13, 2005
- Messages
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Sam Kinison taught me everything I needed to know about life and interacting with women.
"You lying wh0re! You used me, you never loved me! I hope you slide uder a gas truck and taste your own blood. I want my records back, I WANT MY RECORDS BACK!"
I cried like a baby when he was taken away.
"You lying wh0re! You used me, you never loved me! I hope you slide uder a gas truck and taste your own blood. I want my records back, I WANT MY RECORDS BACK!"
I cried like a baby when he was taken away.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
KarmaSutra
Banned
- Joined
- Oct 13, 2005
- Messages
- 4,818
- Reaction score
- 142
- Age
- 53
Dave Chappelle being a very close second. Along with Dom Irerra.Skel said:
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
Mitch Hedberg and Robin Harris - both dead now.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Victory Unlimited
Master Don Juan
Chris Rock: Because his standup routines are funny as hell, AND they always speak truths to the human condition at the same time.
and EQUALLY my favorite:
Rodney Dangerfield: Because just his comedic presence on stage can make you laugh long before he even opens his mouth. That guy oozed comedy from every pore...and his rapid fire "one liner" deliveries were always on point.
May he rest in peace...
and EQUALLY my favorite:
Rodney Dangerfield: Because just his comedic presence on stage can make you laugh long before he even opens his mouth. That guy oozed comedy from every pore...and his rapid fire "one liner" deliveries were always on point.
May he rest in peace...
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
+1 for Chris plus surprisingly, similar on the female side, Kathy Griffin is hillarious in person.Victory Unlimited said:
Rebound Material
Master Don Juan
Im with you on Mitch Hedberg. His delivery is one of a kind.Rollo Tomassi said:
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
Ralphie May
WhitePimp
Master Don Juan
Louis CK without a doubt! :rockon:
The man is a genius, and can make anything funny.
Example,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8VlUFpqCqU
The man is a genius, and can make anything funny.
Example,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8VlUFpqCqU
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Mr. Unique
Master Don Juan
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- Dec 16, 2005
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- 2
George Carlin, Chris Rock
Ace of Flames
Master Don Juan
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My sig says it all.
Its a tribute to a great comedian and a great guy.
Its a tribute to a great comedian and a great guy.
Serialized3
Master Don Juan
Bill Hicks.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.