BeTheChange
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2015
- Messages
- 1,461
- Reaction score
- 1,138
Serious question.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Yeah agree. My "problem" is that all of my hobbies are pretty cheap - gym, music, reading, salsa, etc.The whole point of money is so that you are able to buy the things needed to fulfill your hobbies. You just gotta find some hobbies.
Yes, I hired a physical trainer in December. I'm 7 months in now and I'm really seeing results. There is no other way a 47 year old man like me could have replaced a 21 year old HB9 within days without my having been hitting the gym for a long time.MOr say hiring a physical trainer to coach you. I write my own workouts really, but having someone there pushing you is always great because it keeps you working hard.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
I second that on the Legos. I don't buy new ones anymore, or rarely. But on a stressful day I might come home and build with the ones I have had starting since I was 2 x years old. It takes my mind off of stuff.Some I use on things and some I use on activities. I recently bought a Lego set that I'm currently building. It's not something I do often, but that set was just too cool to not buy. I don't buy much things really, I spend more on experiences. I go on festivals, concerts, travel to other countries and even go on a spa once in a while.
I really just buy whatever I'd like if it doesn't hurt my economy, I can afford most things I want.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.