Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
What exactly is she doing/saying?Fela Kuti said:Usually I just counter-C&F her. But as our relationship goes further, I got tired of her act. I'm thinking of telling her, please stop the C&F. Any advice?
i'm paraphrasing here:Francisco d'Anconia said:What exactly is she doing/saying?
"you're lucky to have me"Fela Kuti said:i'm paraphrasing here:
I tink da wittow baby got his feewings hurted. He don't wanna pway no more, its time for war!Francisco d'Anconia said:play along.![]()
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
kick her in the man nuts....:trouble:Fela Kuti said:i'm paraphrasing here:
"you're lucky to have me"
"i don't love you that much anyway"
"my inbox is filled with your messages. i think i'm getting sick of it."
all were said in a joking tone though. but still..
....are you reading the same thread we all are?MooseGod said:My main one used to be when she'd tell me she loved me...
and I would reply "Thanks, I love me too."![]()
yeah, at first it was fun. but now, i don't know. well maybe i'm getting insecure now. haha.navyseal2101 said:My new gf does that and I think it's cute. I like ****y women, its fun to argue with them.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Just depends on what you like in a girl. In your case, it seems you don't like it, so try the things that have been provided in this thread and see if you get results you like.Fela Kuti said:anyway, isn't the c&f better be toned down (if not eliminated) when you're in a LTR?
The thing is if c/f is a part of her nature (she was that way before they started dating) it may be a bit difficult if he wants her to change. Now, if he agrees to work on his insecurities if she agrees to tone down the c/f....Ace of Flames said:Just depends on what you like in a girl. In your case, it seems you don't like it, so try the things that have been provided in this thread and see if you get results you like.