"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Vacation girl: keeping in touch or not?

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Gary Goldman

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I've tried to find similar thread but no luck. So I was out of town on vacation and met this girl, we had a fling. The thing is, we live in different cities, but I have relatives in her city that I visit once or twice a year. So if we're both single it'd be cool to have a girl to hang out when going there. My question is, to make the job easier, should I keep in touch with her (how often?) or should I invite her for a coffee out of the blue once I'm there? This could be applied for other girls from now on.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Gary Goldman

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Roober said:
I would say only reach out a couple days in advance before you go. If there is interest, she will make time to see you.
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That's a valuable advice. But don't you think I should text her once in a while to keep myself on her to do list?
 
El Payaso

El Payaso

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Don't you have girls in your city?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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El Payaso

El Payaso

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Gary Goldman said:
Why not spinning plates everywhere you go? New and old ones...
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Spinning plates is when you're seeing them regularly. At least on a weekly or bi-weekly basis if not days.

You're only going to be seeing this girl once, if you're lucky, twice a year. What is the guarantee that she will be single or available those times you visit?

Accept it for what it was. A fling.

If you start texting her and chatting her up from long distance, you risk becoming her emotional tampon and entering an LDR without any real benefits.

All you can do now is, forget about her and focus on where you are right now. On the times when you do visit, hit her up and tell her you're in her city and want to take her out or whatever.

Don't waste any more time texting her unless you're trying to get into a relationship with her or something.
 
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Gary Goldman

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You're totally right. It'll change my mindset when dealing with this kind of situation. Thanks.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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