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Toilet paper rant:

lizardking82

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My main job is for a major energy drink company and my job is basically to get our product on as many shelf’s, in as many stores as I can.
With that being said, I am in and out of the grocery store all day and my question is
What the **** is wrong with Americans?
Why toilet paper?
I don’t understand it, people are buying ALL the toilet paper in every store. I mean cases on top of cases. I watched a pallet drop in a store with 50 twelve packs of toilet paper.
i **** you not FIVE people bought all 50 packs of toilet paper. That’s an average of 122 rolls of toilet paper each!

122 roles of toilet paper would literally last me three years. How much do people sh*t? I sh*t once a day, twice if I was drinking the night before and I just don’t understand this. One roll of toilet paper gets me atleast 20 poops.

Are people eating it? If this were a real serious pandemic which I don’t believe it is, why aren’t people stacking up one oranges, garlic, tumeric, grapefruit, vitamin C supplements.. things to boost the immune system.
If things really were bad, and you ran out of toilet paper you could always take a soapy wash cloth and wipe with it. I just don’t understand??!?

Someone please make sense of this toilet paper hoarding for me?
Seems absolutely one of the stupidest things ever. I personally never use toilet paper at home since I have a bidet and it is 10 times more effective at cleaning myself after than paper. Whenever I use paper, there is a tendency to irritate the skin around the zone it is not cleaning everything. Water...yes, bro, water is a blessing. Cleans every little thing and doesn't irritate the skin.
 

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stormrider

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I was thinking Amazon prime pantry but damn even that site is running out of toilet paper. I'm one of those guys who order everything from amazon. Every week I have $200-$300 worth of packages (mostly house hold items like carpet cleaners, toilet paper, coffee, etc). But today I struggled to find toilet paper on Amazon which is UNHEARD of.
 

Danger

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xplt

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Tell an arab or indian, that you have to use toilet paper and they laugh at you. As if you would die when you run out of tp, the shelfs in the markets are empty in germany, too.

I went to the supermarket tuesday evening and I wanted to buy a pack, because I had only one roll left at home. I got a pack at the second store - one of the last five - and because I got everything else in the first store I went to the wine shelf and grabbed a bottle of wine because I felt ashamed with only toilet paper in my hands. The way from the store to my car was damn long...
 
Last edited:

sosousage

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My main job is for a major energy drink company and my job is basically to get our product on as many shelf’s, in as many stores as I can.
With that being said, I am in and out of the grocery store all day and my question is
What the **** is wrong with Americans?
Why toilet paper?
I don’t understand it, people are buying ALL the toilet paper in every store. I mean cases on top of cases. I watched a pallet drop in a store with 50 twelve packs of toilet paper.
i **** you not FIVE people bought all 50 packs of toilet paper. That’s an average of 122 rolls of toilet paper each!

122 roles of toilet paper would literally last me three years. How much do people sh*t? I sh*t once a day, twice if I was drinking the night before and I just don’t understand this. One roll of toilet paper gets me atleast 20 poops.

Are people eating it? If this were a real serious pandemic which I don’t believe it is, why aren’t people stacking up one oranges, garlic, tumeric, grapefruit, vitamin C supplements.. things to boost the immune system.
If things really were bad, and you ran out of toilet paper you could always take a soapy wash cloth and wipe with it. I just don’t understand??!?

Someone please make sense of this toilet paper hoarding for me?
i use over half of toilet paper roll for just one shi.t because of my hairy a.ssho.le and really sticky poor poo consistence caused by coffee
 
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bcude

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Partly because of the fact that fear makes people less intelligent and rational, which in effect also creates a impression that you're under some kind of threat and have a strong urge to act, in some way, or some form so people go out to stock up on food and sanitary products, like toilet paper so they get the feeling that they're atleast doing something.
The enormous popularity with toilet paper is largely because of monkey see, monkey do phenomenon, which in turn creates an even bigger effect because rational people also want to buy it now since it could run out. If you've a family of four you need some.
Lastly it's become somewhat trendy too.

If this were a real serious pandemic which I don’t believe it is
This is ignorance though. It's not up for debate, it's a fact.
 

samspade

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Bro I have a bidet. **** toilet paper, you literally are fingering your asshole with tissue lol
I don't understand why bidets aren't more common in America. It's kind of gross that people don't use them everywhere. I mean if I got shyt on my face somehow, I wouldn't just use toilet paper to clean it.
 

RickTheToad

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I was thinking Amazon prime pantry but damn even that site is running out of toilet paper. I'm one of those guys who order everything from amazon. Every week I have $200-$300 worth of packages (mostly house hold items like carpet cleaners, toilet paper, coffee, etc). But today I struggled to find toilet paper on Amazon which is UNHEARD of.
I can hook you up. For you, just 10 bucks a roll. Plus, I'll even upgrade you to double-ply. Rick's got your back.
 

RickTheToad

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I don't understand why bidets aren't more common in America. It's kind of gross that people don't use them everywhere. I mean if I got shyt on my face somehow, I wouldn't just use toilet paper to clean it.
Most people use wipes and just dry off with toilet paper. You can also wet toilet paper and even use some mild soap if need be. If a person has any anal fissures or hemorrhoids, that can help tremendously.
 
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ShePays

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My main job is for a major energy drink company and my job is basically to get our product on as many shelf’s, in as many stores as I can.
With that being said, I am in and out of the grocery store all day and my question is
What the **** is wrong with Americans?
Why toilet paper?
I don’t understand it, people are buying ALL the toilet paper in every store. I mean cases on top of cases. I watched a pallet drop in a store with 50 twelve packs of toilet paper.
i **** you not FIVE people bought all 50 packs of toilet paper. That’s an average of 122 rolls of toilet paper each!

122 roles of toilet paper would literally last me three years. How much do people sh*t? I sh*t once a day, twice if I was drinking the night before and I just don’t understand this. One roll of toilet paper gets me atleast 20 poops.

Are people eating it? If this were a real serious pandemic which I don’t believe it is, why aren’t people stacking up one oranges, garlic, tumeric, grapefruit, vitamin C supplements.. things to boost the immune system.
If things really were bad, and you ran out of toilet paper you could always take a soapy wash cloth and wipe with it. I just don’t understand??!?

Someone please make sense of this toilet paper hoarding for me?
I think the TP companies are sending shoppers in to wipe out supplies, and to artificially simulate demand.
 

samspade

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Most people use wipes and just dry off with toilet paper. You can also wet toilet paper and even use some mild soap if need be. If a person has any anal fissures or hemorrhoids, that can help tremendously.
They do? I didn't know that was so common. I've heard those wipes aren't flushable in spite of what they say on the package. People that work in the waste industry say they clogs pipes and don't dissolve. Also that's a bunch of chemicals you're putting on your bunghole. They come in handy if you're in public but I still think water is the best solution, for the organism and for the environment. I still use TP but always wash off with the bidet if I can. (But when I travel I always have wipes.) But hey - everyone's different.
 

RickTheToad

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As long as it's a nice phat female ass, all good. Need to make sure that she clean and sh it (no pun intended).

They do? I didn't know that was so common. I've heard those wipes aren't flushable in spite of what they say on the package. People that work in the waste industry say they clogs pipes and don't dissolve. Also that's a bunch of chemicals you're putting on your bunghole. They come in handy if you're in public but I still think water is the best solution, for the organism and for the environment. I still use TP but always wash off with the bidet if I can. (But when I travel I always have wipes.) But hey - everyone's different.
They make septic safe ones now. Most people in urban areas have sewer, so it's not that big of a deal. Not sure how people wipe with no water.. That must be quiet uncomfortable.
 
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zekko

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I say do it! A lot of people get cold water ones only, but I like my hot water on the old bullseye.
I forgot about the temperature considerations. Cold water in the winter doesn't sound too pleasant, but I wouldn't want scalding water either. Looks like I'm going to have to do some research if I decide to pull the trigger. Sounds convenient though. It gets harder to reach around behind me as I get older, er I mean more muscle bound. If the stores are out of toilet paper, I wonder if there is going to be a run on bidets?
 
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