Milfhunter95
Don Juan
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Is it just around my area that it's considered weird to DM a girl on social media these days? I never really understood why, just a few years ago it was okay
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Social Media DM's
- Thread starter Milfhunter95
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Glassguy
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It really depends on what the message is.....not the fact that you send a message.
I would normally only DM someone on FB or Instagram under 2 conditions (obviously if I have interest):
1.) she posts something that I am very knowledgeable about or interested in.
2.) We have several mutual friends that I am close with and would give good feedback about me.
Example:
Woman posts a pic that catches my eye, so I send her "Well hello lol. I just saw the pic of you out boating this weekend. What group of people do you normally boat with?"
A woman added me 2 weeks ago. She was cute, single and we have several mutual friends.
"Hello lol. Curious, how do you know _______?". That led to a lay 8 days later.
If I send a DM, its always a curious question, friendly and non aggressive. Based on how she responds determines if I reply back or not. Most of the time she will turn my question into a question of her own if there is interest on her part.... "Hey! I know so and so....how do you know him/her?"
"hey! Yeah I go out with so and so on their boat on occasion. Do you know them and do you have a boat"?
Rarely a chick doesnt read the message or doesnt respond. Dont sweat it. Its a numbers game.
I would normally only DM someone on FB or Instagram under 2 conditions (obviously if I have interest):
1.) she posts something that I am very knowledgeable about or interested in.
2.) We have several mutual friends that I am close with and would give good feedback about me.
Example:
Woman posts a pic that catches my eye, so I send her "Well hello lol. I just saw the pic of you out boating this weekend. What group of people do you normally boat with?"
A woman added me 2 weeks ago. She was cute, single and we have several mutual friends.
"Hello lol. Curious, how do you know _______?". That led to a lay 8 days later.
If I send a DM, its always a curious question, friendly and non aggressive. Based on how she responds determines if I reply back or not. Most of the time she will turn my question into a question of her own if there is interest on her part.... "Hey! I know so and so....how do you know him/her?"
"hey! Yeah I go out with so and so on their boat on occasion. Do you know them and do you have a boat"?
Rarely a chick doesnt read the message or doesnt respond. Dont sweat it. Its a numbers game.
Milfhunter95
Don Juan
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I agree with you that's the only way I DM a girl too.
But this isn't really a question about me. I have a buddy who has messaged girls I know, and if I'm ever out with them, they'll say something along the lines like "Ew, so and so DM'd me. I didn't respond though"
Could it be cause he's just messaging them with no topic?
This has kind of prevented me from messaging new girls. I'll usually only DM girls that I know, but I want to expand
Glassguy
Moderator
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Who knows what he is saying to them. If he is acting creepy, or isn't attractive and they are, the outcome will be them talking negatively about it.
I don't really act interested in them when I message them, rather on what I am asking them about (common interests or mutual friends).
I believe that through fb and Instagram it's important to build rapport but be indifferent.
Now if the woman starts messaging me first , it's a different story.
I don't really act interested in them when I message them, rather on what I am asking them about (common interests or mutual friends).
I believe that through fb and Instagram it's important to build rapport but be indifferent.
Now if the woman starts messaging me first , it's a different story.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.