hjsknksbm
Don Juan
Should a guy pay on the first date?
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Should a guy pay on the first date? (Poll)
- Thread starter hjsknksbm
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
diablo
Master Don Juan
I would at least make the offer... It's the gentlemanly thing to do.
Omni
Don Juan
Whoever pays gains power and control (unless the other person is a golddigger, in which case RUN).
kixs
Don Juan
I belive that the one who invites should pay - usually man! So in any case, 1st date should be casual ( coffee or something ) and it isn't expensive in any case!
If you're doing something more expensive like a dinner... then I woud pay 1/2 + drinks. If going to the movies, I would pay for the movie and she would for the drinks.
Something like that!
bye
If you're doing something more expensive like a dinner... then I woud pay 1/2 + drinks. If going to the movies, I would pay for the movie and she would for the drinks.
Something like that!
bye
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Crank_It_Up
Master Don Juan
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On a first date, if you asked her out, you should pay... if she isn't worth it, why did you ask her out to begin with? If you can't pay, stop reading this forum and get a job.
I disagree. If I buy a girl things that doesn't give me power, it just shows that I'm willing to do things for her. That's bad.
I wouldn't pay at all. She should have a job and should pay for herself. As for that "whoever invited should pay" bull****, do you really think a woman who asked you out would pay for you?
The problem is, society as a whole still expects men to pay so you can either try to change that one girl at a time (and appear to most as poor or cheap) or just go along with the inconvenience.
Also, the only girls that will expect you to pay for everything are golddiggers. If you pay for the first date, nearly every girl will offer to pay for something else down the line.
( . )( . )
Banned
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
I heard that if you invite a girl out to drinks or coffee, you should offer to pay. If a lunch date I have no idea. As for a real eveing date the guy should pay. But, you shouldn't be going on dates untill after you've had sex with her.
Kineti[C]harm
Master Don Juan
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I have never ever inn my whole life paid for anything for a girl except female friends and family. Actually most first dates have been the girl treating wine, cooking dinner or whatever. And it's always worked out great 
So my logic is, aslong as you haven't made it like that (asking her out to a special type of treat) then don't.
So my logic is, aslong as you haven't made it like that (asking her out to a special type of treat) then don't.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
Here's my situation. I'm getting pretty close to my oneitis girl. We talk every day and walk togther to the parking lot after class. Next time I see her; next, next Monday I'm either going get her phone number or have her come to lunch with me.
If we get lunch should I offer to pay for her? There's also a chance that her girlfriend might come along as well since they are almost allways togther. In that situation its generally assumed that everybody would pay for themselves right? They won't expect me to pay for the both of them.
If we get lunch should I offer to pay for her? There's also a chance that her girlfriend might come along as well since they are almost allways togther. In that situation its generally assumed that everybody would pay for themselves right? They won't expect me to pay for the both of them.
( . )( . )
Banned
I think your at the wrong place mate.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
So? If I can end up making her a ƒuck buddy it would be amazing. BTW I am doing somebody else already but its not consistent enough.
The thought of haveing constant sex with a hot 18 year old is something I can't pass up.
The thought of haveing constant sex with a hot 18 year old is something I can't pass up.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Crank_It_Up
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 21, 2004
- Messages
- 546
- Reaction score
- 1
lol, where did you get this idea?
squirrels
Master Don Juan
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Yes, but you shouldn't end up spending a lot on the first date anyway, so it shouldn't matter. If you did, you lost control of the date. (been there, done this)
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
I think I read about it here or at Fast Seduction and also in several seduction eBooks I've read.
Spending a lot of money on her is not going to get her to sleep with you. It may even have the opposite effect and she might hold off on sex because she sees you as a long term guy.
( . )( . )
Banned
he was dead right, yes guys USED to reward/buy chicks in the past for a way to get her to fvck, this no longer has the effectiveness it once did.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.