hjsknksbm
Don Juan
Should a guy pay on the first date?
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Should a guy pay on the first date? (Poll)
- Thread starter hjsknksbm
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
diablo
Master Don Juan
I would at least make the offer... It's the gentlemanly thing to do.
Omni
Don Juan
Whoever pays gains power and control (unless the other person is a golddigger, in which case RUN).
kixs
Don Juan
I belive that the one who invites should pay - usually man! So in any case, 1st date should be casual ( coffee or something ) and it isn't expensive in any case!
If you're doing something more expensive like a dinner... then I woud pay 1/2 + drinks. If going to the movies, I would pay for the movie and she would for the drinks.
Something like that!
bye
If you're doing something more expensive like a dinner... then I woud pay 1/2 + drinks. If going to the movies, I would pay for the movie and she would for the drinks.
Something like that!
bye
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Crank_It_Up
Master Don Juan
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On a first date, if you asked her out, you should pay... if she isn't worth it, why did you ask her out to begin with? If you can't pay, stop reading this forum and get a job.
I disagree. If I buy a girl things that doesn't give me power, it just shows that I'm willing to do things for her. That's bad.
I wouldn't pay at all. She should have a job and should pay for herself. As for that "whoever invited should pay" bull****, do you really think a woman who asked you out would pay for you?
The problem is, society as a whole still expects men to pay so you can either try to change that one girl at a time (and appear to most as poor or cheap) or just go along with the inconvenience.
Also, the only girls that will expect you to pay for everything are golddiggers. If you pay for the first date, nearly every girl will offer to pay for something else down the line.
( . )( . )
Banned
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
I heard that if you invite a girl out to drinks or coffee, you should offer to pay. If a lunch date I have no idea. As for a real eveing date the guy should pay. But, you shouldn't be going on dates untill after you've had sex with her.
Kineti[C]harm
Master Don Juan
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I have never ever inn my whole life paid for anything for a girl except female friends and family. Actually most first dates have been the girl treating wine, cooking dinner or whatever. And it's always worked out great 
So my logic is, aslong as you haven't made it like that (asking her out to a special type of treat) then don't.
So my logic is, aslong as you haven't made it like that (asking her out to a special type of treat) then don't.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
Here's my situation. I'm getting pretty close to my oneitis girl. We talk every day and walk togther to the parking lot after class. Next time I see her; next, next Monday I'm either going get her phone number or have her come to lunch with me.
If we get lunch should I offer to pay for her? There's also a chance that her girlfriend might come along as well since they are almost allways togther. In that situation its generally assumed that everybody would pay for themselves right? They won't expect me to pay for the both of them.
If we get lunch should I offer to pay for her? There's also a chance that her girlfriend might come along as well since they are almost allways togther. In that situation its generally assumed that everybody would pay for themselves right? They won't expect me to pay for the both of them.
( . )( . )
Banned
I think your at the wrong place mate.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
So? If I can end up making her a ƒuck buddy it would be amazing. BTW I am doing somebody else already but its not consistent enough.
The thought of haveing constant sex with a hot 18 year old is something I can't pass up.
The thought of haveing constant sex with a hot 18 year old is something I can't pass up.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Crank_It_Up
Master Don Juan
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lol, where did you get this idea?
squirrels
Master Don Juan
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Yes, but you shouldn't end up spending a lot on the first date anyway, so it shouldn't matter. If you did, you lost control of the date. (been there, done this)
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
I think I read about it here or at Fast Seduction and also in several seduction eBooks I've read.
Spending a lot of money on her is not going to get her to sleep with you. It may even have the opposite effect and she might hold off on sex because she sees you as a long term guy.
( . )( . )
Banned
he was dead right, yes guys USED to reward/buy chicks in the past for a way to get her to fvck, this no longer has the effectiveness it once did.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.