"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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She demands a 5th date out to dinner prior to banging

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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TheNewStyle123

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I thought things were going well....
Ahhh I mean could I have sex with this girl again? Yes. Do I want to? Not really... I just don't really have a desire to see her again. It hit me after she left Sunday. I thought "the sex was OK, but she is just a little too immature." I was especially turned off when she texted me a day later saying she booked a reservation for a brunch at another place next weekend.. like that's not cool. That's her steering the frame of the whole relationship.

"You take me to restaurant X for brunch on this date/time and we will have sex again." Not fun. To transactional.

I've got my eye set on this Brazilian girl I just started talking to. We are going to have a first date this Saturday if I can maintain her IL until then. It's cliché, but yet again I find myself enjoying the conversation (and company) more with Brazilian and Hispanic girls than Americans...
 

TheNewStyle123

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Well, you could go to brunch and bang her one more time. This time though, since you have no desire to see after this, facefvck her while 69ing. It's the best. And I'm talking about an angry facefvck.

The sloppier the better. Then just, stop contacting her.
I like the way you think sir hahahah
 

EyeBRollin

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I honestly think I might... she is finishing this capstone thing for her Masters and wants to celebrate next weekend so she already made us reservations for brunch in Boston. I don't like the fact that SHE just booked these reservations without asking me, obviously expecting me to pay..
If she booked reservations and asked you, she should pay. No need to be upset about it. As I said a few pages ago, this gal really digs you. Proceed if you want an LTR. If not, just ghost her.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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TheNewStyle123

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If she booked reservations and asked you, she should pay. No need to be upset about it. As I said a few pages ago, this gal really digs you. Proceed if you want an LTR. If not, just ghost her.
I agree - she should pay, but I got the drift from her that she wouldn't even think twice about that. It would be more expected that I would pay.
 

EyeBRollin

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I agree - she should pay, but I got the drift from her that she wouldn't even think twice about that. It would be more expected that I would pay.
I don’t like that she booked reservations without specifying that she wants to treat you. That’s masculine energy. She should have hinted that she would like you to take her there. You could nudge her gently and counter offer:

“That’s a nice idea but I’m not in the position to take you there on <date>. Join me for <counteroffer date> instead?”

She should get the hint. If she’s paying, she will speak up and say it. If you really don’t dig this girl though just ghost man. She’s running relationship game. Don’t waste her time if that’s not what you see with her.
 

Lookatu

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I was especially turned off when she texted me a day later saying she booked a reservation for a brunch at another place next weekend.. like that's not cool. That's her steering the frame of the whole relationship.
Yeah it sounds to me that she likes you, but considering she has princess syndrome, she's use to getting everything her way and being in control. This isn't something she does maliciously necessarily but I think just through time and her being spoiled, this is her reality and the way she operates on a subconcious level without giving it too much thought.

Desperate/thirsty/white knight/beta/blue pilled dudes would've been ok being her b1tch but I know you got options and a better brain. ;)
 

TheNewStyle123

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Yeah it sounds to me that she likes you, but considering she has princess syndrome, she's use to getting everything her way and being in control. This isn't something she does maliciously necessarily but I think just through time and her being spoiled, this is her reality and the way she operates on a subconcious level without giving it too much thought.

Desperate/thirsty/white knight/beta/blue pilled dudes would've been ok being her b1tch but I know you got options and a better brain. ;)
Couldn't agree more man. I think inherently she is just used to getting her way. The way she talks about her wealthy parents, friend group, leisure activities, ex BF, etc., just not my vibe. I don't come from that upbringing and it's a huge turn off to me. Even if the sex was great I would maybe only buck her a few more times. I am much more into these other girls I'm talking to right now and would rather fuuck them/enjoy their company than spend another dime on this daddy's girl hahaha.

And both you and @EyeBRollin are right..... she DEFINITELY wants a LTR with me.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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BillyPilgrim

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I was gonna say, I've had nothing but bad experience with girls who's names start with T.

Tiffany, especially.
Lol, I've had nothing but bad experience with girls from Boston (Puritan country).

Newstyle, you gotta move man.
 

Focal core

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[
Couldn't agree more man. I think inherently she is just used to getting her way. The way she talks about her wealthy parents, friend group, leisure activities, ex BF, etc., just not my vibe. I don't come from that upbringing and it's a huge turn off to me. Even if the sex was great I would maybe only buck her a few more times. I am much more into these other girls I'm talking to right now and would rather fuuck them/enjoy their company than spend another dime on this daddy's girl hahaha.

And both you and @EyeBRollin are right..... she DEFINITELY wants a LTR with me.
I can sense a lot of self-worth in this man. Youre on the right track. Rock on.
 

Focal core

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hahah thanks man I appreciate it! I am learning since my divorce. I have just met so many other fun girls that are enjoyable to be around and give back - why waste my time with this one?
You will discover that a girl giving back are worthy of your time.. It should be that way since the earlydays of human existence. Dont waste your energy with time sucking hoes just finding yourself to please them more just for their favour on you.. Life is bigger than that.. Get a great partner and someone to grow with.

If you had seen playful, loving interplay between two adults who admired and respected each other, you would surely be seeking that relationship dynamic for yourself, you'd never settle for less
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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TheNewStyle123

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You will discover that a girl giving back are worthy of your time.. It should be that way since the earlydays of human existence. Dont waste your energy with time sucking hoes just finding yourself to please them more just for their favour on you.. Life is bigger than that.. Get a great partner and someone to grow with.

If you had seen playful, loving interplay between two adults who admired and respected each other, you would surely be seeking that relationship dynamic for yourself, you'd never settle for less
That's the tough part for me right now. I am definitely really into this one Brazilian girl I'm seeing. Very sweet, intelligent, loyal, giving, sexy, affectionate, etc. She checks off all of my criteria. But I just wonder if it is too soon to date since I have only been separated 8 months. (she knows this too). I don't want to just settle for someone because I really like them now. I feel like I shoulder figure out more about myself first before entering another LTR leaving a marriage.

If this was two years down the line I wouldn't hesitate to date this girl. I am also in the process of trying to go through a career change in life, and it may take me away from this area.
 

EyeBRollin

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That's the tough part for me right now. I am definitely really into this one Brazilian girl I'm seeing. Very sweet, intelligent, loyal, giving, sexy, affectionate, etc. She checks off all of my criteria. But I just wonder if it is too soon to date since I have only been separated 8 months. (she knows this too). I don't want to just settle for someone because I really like them now. I feel like I shoulder figure out more about myself first before entering another LTR leaving a marriage.

If this was two years down the line I wouldn't hesitate to date this girl. I am also in the process of trying to go through a career change in life, and it may take me away from this area.
Don’t put a head trip on yourself. If she’s a good girl, date her. Sort your personal demons out with a shrink.
 

Lookatu

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That's the tough part for me right now. I am definitely really into this one Brazilian girl I'm seeing. Very sweet, intelligent, loyal, giving, sexy, affectionate, etc. She checks off all of my criteria. But I just wonder if it is too soon to date since I have only been separated 8 months. (she knows this too). I don't want to just settle for someone because I really like them now. I feel like I shoulder figure out more about myself first before entering another LTR leaving a marriage.

If this was two years down the line I wouldn't hesitate to date this girl. I am also in the process of trying to go through a career change in life, and it may take me away from this area.
IMO don't let a good thing pass you by. That's the mistake that all independent career women make, right?

As for being too soon, as long as you are healed and ready to move forward is all that counts. Don't put an artificial timeframe around when you "think" you're ready. Most people don't really know themselves or have a false sense.

But at the same time, no need to rush it but eventually the longer you two hang out, the question will come up from her end. That's when you need to make sure you have an answer for her.
 

Focal core

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That's the tough part for me right now. I am definitely really into this one Brazilian girl I'm seeing. Very sweet, intelligent, loyal, giving, sexy, affectionate, etc. She checks off all of my criteria. But I just wonder if it is too soon to date since I have only been separated 8 months. (she knows this too). I don't want to just settle for someone because I really like them now. I feel like I shoulder figure out more about myself first before entering another LTR leaving a marriage.

If this was two years down the line I wouldn't hesitate to date this girl. I am also in the process of trying to go through a career change in life, and it may take me away from this area.
This is funny because im being saperated from my ex Bpd for 4 years now, i never tired enjoy being alone with myself, prior to her ive never stop dating until we parting. 8 month is a good time for heal, if you feel you dont need relationship right now, means youre ready for one.. The right one.. Give this girl a chance. Made she proved she deserve you. Hey if she wants you she would stay going through your changes
 

TheNewStyle123

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This is funny because im being saperated from my ex Bpd for 4 years now, i never tired enjoy being alone with myself, prior to her ive never stop dating until we parting. 8 month is a good time for heal, if you feel you dont need relationship right now, means youre ready for one.. The right one.. Give this girl a chance. Made she proved she deserve you. Hey if she wants you she would stay going through your changes
Thanks guys, this is all really good advice! @EyeBRollin @Lookatu @Focal core
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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