I'm Joe Dirt
Master Don Juan
That guy probably thought he was scoring major points when he made that tape.
What an idiot.
What an idiot.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
How about 0.5th anniversery?Originally posted by legolas
What the f*ck is wrong with people a 6 month annversary makes no linguistic sense because the word anniversary means: The annually recurring date of a past event. The x month anniversary makes no sense whatsoever
btw. Did anyone count the number of times he used the L word? (no you perv it wasn't lesbian)
Makes me wonder, why do guys do this? Is it the media who sets them up for this breakdown?
dito.Originally posted by frivolousz21
6 months actually is something to celebrate..
not like that.
but going out for dinner and recognizing you made it a half a yr a good accomplishment.
not gift worthy though.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
nah that was wayyyy to much sap. She probably did eat it, got full and throw up!:nono:Originally posted by Wyldfire
If she was really into him in the first place she would have eaten up all the sap...
The guy looks really young, which is what the excessive sap can be attributed to...probably his first real girlfriend. You'll have that. Yeah, it was sappy, very sappy...but wouldn't be grounds to dump him unless she was looking for a reason to anyhow. Girls love that mushy sh*t IF they're into the guy. He may have suffocated her prior to that, though...which WOULD drive her away. So, it wasn't the tape so much as it was whatever he did in combination with it.Originally posted by DJDamage
nah that was wayyyy to much sap. She probably did eat it, got full and throw up!:nono:
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.