"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Post-sex no contact

Snag87

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I've seen dating coaches advocate never being the first to initiate contact after sex. The reasoning being the first person to contact cedes control. If the girl never contacts you after you simply never speak to her again.

Any opinion on this strategy?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Billtx49

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The sex itself isn’t that much of a deal changer from your usual post date recontact procedure. If anything, I would say a few days more time than your usual 5-7 day or whatever recontact time, but next to four day recontact time will probably signal thirsty horndog to her, then the ‘you just want me for sex’ b.s. may start.…
 
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Depends how good the sex was! Just kidding, I've done both. Don't agree. If you have her an academy award winning performance I wouldn't worry about contact after.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Suave88

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I've seen dating coaches advocate never being the first to initiate contact after sex. The reasoning being the first person to contact cedes control. If the girl never contacts you after you simply never speak to her again.

Any opinion on this strategy?
I am my own school. If I liked the sex and I am sure she liked me. You bet I will call her back. The time I wait depends. However, in my experience, I don't call, I just go see her.
 

Serenity

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To say that contacting someone is a forfeit of control is outright ridiculous, although still true for those who believe it is so and act in accordance with their silly beliefs. Example, a guy believes he will lose his control by contacting a woman, if he does so he will have ruined his own confidence and act in ways to give her all the control. He could have chosen to assert control at any point after that action, but didn't because he was deluded by his own false belief without recognizing it.

It's basic self sabotage. Easily preventable and who contacts who first is irrelevant when it's recognized that there's a choice for every passing moment, to assert oneself or voluntarily become a doormat.

We do this to ourselves and many don't see the deeper cause of failure, assuming it's something shallow like "it's because I reached out first".
 

Bokanovsky

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I've seen dating coaches advocate never being the first to initiate contact after sex. The reasoning being the first person to contact cedes control. If the girl never contacts you after you simply never speak to her again.

Any opinion on this strategy?
Honestly, I think this is BS. Many women are insecure and might think that you not reaching out first is a sign that the sex was bad. And let's face, most of us guys have done that - going NC after sex because something turned us off.

At the end of the day, if she's into you, you will not "cede control" unless you do something stupid, like acting needy or insecure.
 

old_skoolr

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In my experience, the first time I've slept with a girl, they've ALWAYS messaged me the next day.

It's only when sex is a consistent thing that they stop messaging me the next day.
 
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