You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
A light beer or a glass of wine or smoking some pot with friends to get high for une on some occasion is a different thing and to heck, I might do that once in a while, too. But I think you know who I was referring to in my comment up there. It is the regular users, not the casual ones, that I have a problem with.I've also never done drugs. I've drank and smoked in the past, and still occasionally enjoy a light beer, so I'm not being judgmental - just curious how others react to smokers.
I agree that it's a way of detaching, and it's obviously used to relieve stress. I personally just hit the gym when I feel like this.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Of course there plenty of non-smokers that are **** people and there are smokers who are great people, too. I said it in general, my average girl, when she smokes...it comes with another bagagge full of other problems. Smoking at an early age is a sign that this person has a lot of stress in their life, so much so they need to use nicotine (cigarettes are practically soft drugs) to kill it. Would you be eager to date a drug user? Would you be eager to date someone that is hooked up on some stress medication or regular painkillers or sth? I wouldn't really.I've never went out with a woman that does this to excess (eg, 20 a day).
Find the judgement above to be a bit strange. Been out with smokers who were great women, and ones that were not so great. Same with non-smokers.
The cigarettes had very little bearing on it.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.