Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
A light beer or a glass of wine or smoking some pot with friends to get high for une on some occasion is a different thing and to heck, I might do that once in a while, too. But I think you know who I was referring to in my comment up there. It is the regular users, not the casual ones, that I have a problem with.I've also never done drugs. I've drank and smoked in the past, and still occasionally enjoy a light beer, so I'm not being judgmental - just curious how others react to smokers.
I agree that it's a way of detaching, and it's obviously used to relieve stress. I personally just hit the gym when I feel like this.
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
Of course there plenty of non-smokers that are **** people and there are smokers who are great people, too. I said it in general, my average girl, when she smokes...it comes with another bagagge full of other problems. Smoking at an early age is a sign that this person has a lot of stress in their life, so much so they need to use nicotine (cigarettes are practically soft drugs) to kill it. Would you be eager to date a drug user? Would you be eager to date someone that is hooked up on some stress medication or regular painkillers or sth? I wouldn't really.I've never went out with a woman that does this to excess (eg, 20 a day).
Find the judgement above to be a bit strange. Been out with smokers who were great women, and ones that were not so great. Same with non-smokers.
The cigarettes had very little bearing on it.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.