Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Abort those plans immediately. If her time is limited then why are you going to waste two hours staring at a movie screen? Take her to a lounge or someplace you two can talk and put your moves on her there. movies are horrible first dates.BigEd71 said:i know its not the ideal date, but with our schedules this is what we have to work with
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
J Roc said:Abort those plans immediately. If her time is limited then why are you going to waste two hours staring at a movie screen? Take her to a lounge or someplace you two can talk and put your moves on her there. movies are horrible first dates.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
I completely disagree. Watching a good movie together gives you a shared experience, which is a plus. But it's not the best idea for a first date, or for someone you don't know well, because you can't really talk.alpha_ash said:Movie dates kill attraction.
HA! I'm putting this one in the bank.Mike32ct said:If she sits too far away from you on the couch, use this line...
"You can move over (signal to move next to you). I'm not in to 'long distance relationships' lol"
I've only rarely seen couples making out in theaters. Maybe it's because I prefer to go to the matinees - they're cheaper and are less crowded.sageproduct said:I've heard of guys who just kino escalate and make out the whole time at a movie. I don't think I'd ever do that at a theater, and definitely not on a first date with someone I just met. It's different if it's someone in a social circle who you already know though...
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Plutoman said:Meh, movies can quickly build sexual tension. I definitely wouldn't consider it cancel-worthy.
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=134945
Read up on muscleman's journal for examples.
How old are you and her?
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.