Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Abort those plans immediately. If her time is limited then why are you going to waste two hours staring at a movie screen? Take her to a lounge or someplace you two can talk and put your moves on her there. movies are horrible first dates.BigEd71 said:i know its not the ideal date, but with our schedules this is what we have to work with
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
J Roc said:Abort those plans immediately. If her time is limited then why are you going to waste two hours staring at a movie screen? Take her to a lounge or someplace you two can talk and put your moves on her there. movies are horrible first dates.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I completely disagree. Watching a good movie together gives you a shared experience, which is a plus. But it's not the best idea for a first date, or for someone you don't know well, because you can't really talk.alpha_ash said:Movie dates kill attraction.
HA! I'm putting this one in the bank.Mike32ct said:If she sits too far away from you on the couch, use this line...
"You can move over (signal to move next to you). I'm not in to 'long distance relationships' lol"
I've only rarely seen couples making out in theaters. Maybe it's because I prefer to go to the matinees - they're cheaper and are less crowded.sageproduct said:I've heard of guys who just kino escalate and make out the whole time at a movie. I don't think I'd ever do that at a theater, and definitely not on a first date with someone I just met. It's different if it's someone in a social circle who you already know though...
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Plutoman said:Meh, movies can quickly build sexual tension. I definitely wouldn't consider it cancel-worthy.
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=134945
Read up on muscleman's journal for examples.
How old are you and her?
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.