Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Main plate hooked up with another guy during new years, kind of bothered.

BackInTheGame78

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I think the simple answer is this:

Ideal Plate - regular good sex, low drama, low maintenance, low investment, good vibes, turns a blind eye to what you do with other girls.

Ideal Girlfriend - regular good sex, low drama, low maintenance, low investment, good vibes, turns a blind eye to what you do with other girls.
You really think an ideal girlfriend doesn't hold you accountable?
 

devilkingx2

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You really think an ideal girlfriend doesn't hold you accountable?
I think it's to a lesser extent than an ideal Plate. Like an ideal Plate would probably say "ooo that's hot lets have a threesome" every time you hook up with a new girl.

But an ideal girlfriend would just not care if you go to strip clubs or who you dance with at parties.

A lot of YouTube PUAs/dating coaches claim to be in one way open relationships where their girlfriend lets them have other girls or multiple girlfriends. But I am skeptical that girls who agree to that actually exist.
 

SargeMaximus

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I think it's to a lesser extent than an ideal Plate. Like an ideal Plate would probably say "ooo that's hot lets have a threesome" every time you hook up with a new girl.

But an ideal girlfriend would just not care if you go to strip clubs or who you dance with at parties.

A lot of YouTube PUAs/dating coaches claim to be in one way open relationships where their girlfriend lets them have other girls or multiple girlfriends. But I am skeptical that girls who agree to that actually exist.
Yeah ime they are hella jealous even when they say they are ok with it. Then it just takes them to read one article of being a boss b!tch for her to try and get you to be exclusive
 

RazorRambo24

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Sorry that happened to you my dude.. But if you're going to play the game, you can't be hurt by a girl sleeping with other men .. She's not yours lol.. theres no strings attached

Plus you're dating someone in a relationship.. That's lack of integrity as a man on your part, so what do you expect when it doesnt work in your favor? You get what you deserve.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

Agree with @BackInTheGame78 and @Barrister and @Howiestern (all players in their own right, by the way)…. Look. Hot women know the Game cold. You caught feels for a hot chick you can’t have & you are telling yourself (to no avail) that you’re cool.

You aren’t cool. You are dealing with a tigress who is just as dangerous as she is hot.

Date other chicks. This one already owns you (and her BF too).

Brutal (sorry) but true.

Cheers
 

Divorced w 3

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Advice from the old lady:

Agree with @BackInTheGame78 and @Barrister and @Howiestern (all players in their own right, by the way)…. Look. Hot women know the Game cold. You caught feels for a hot chick you can’t have & you are telling yourself (to no avail) that you’re cool.

You aren’t cool. You are dealing with a tigress who is just as dangerous as she is hot.

Date other chicks. This one already owns you (and her BF too).

Brutal (sorry) but true.

Cheers
Tigress? Dangerous? Lol. Get the fvck out of here. You don’t know dangerous.

The only danger is in between the OP’s ears.

Men don’t come here to get psyched out, they come here to get psyched up.

Go blend your next meal and ask a nice person nearby to help you take a seat.

OP- Move on, or take it for what it is, or demand exclusivity. None of those are bad options. Be real with yourself. You’ll feel better.
 
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BackInTheGame78

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Tigress? Dangerous? Lol. Get the fvck out of here. You don’t know dangerous.

The only danger is in between the OP’s ears.

Men don’t come here to get psyched out, they come here to get psyched up.

Go blend your next meal and ask a nice person nearby to help you take a seat.

OP- Move on, or take it for what it is, or demand exclusivity. None of those are bad options. Be real with yourself. You’ll feel better.
Demand exclusivity from a girl with a boyfriend who is cheating on him with OP? OP is not in a position to be demanding anything.

Have you lost your marbles?
 

Divorced w 3

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Demand exclusivity from a girl with a boyfriend who is cheating on him with OP? OP is not in a position to be demanding anything.

Have you lost your marbles?
I never said he was going to get his wish, but if it’s on his chest he is better off saying it. If you want to get better at things, put the truth out in the world and see how it goes. Just have to be ready to deal with whatever comes back from it. She would probably tell him no way but, he’s lying to himself right now and a position of honesty with oneself is the only answer
 

Divorced w 3

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This is what I’d do….I’d bang her super hard Saturday and talk real dirty. While you do it say stuff like - who’s prssy is this? And whose trtties? And whose ars. Stuff like that. Do her like you OWN her and make sure to spank her while you do it. Call her naughty and smack that ars. That’ll teach her a lesson.
I think this is a fair point. If you’re laying that hard D and she’s squirming and crawling up the wall and then you immediately toss her ass out you’re gonna have a friend for life.
 

Barrister

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Its not so much that I caught feelings, its more like an egotistical feeling to want to be her main attention but to also keep it non-exclusive. As @Mike32ct mentioned, I believe she also said it to rub it in my face a bit since she was kind of getting attached to me before the holidays.

I appreciate everyone's input, if she is just a plate, I have to treat it as such and not be bothered nor care who she messes with or hasn't messed with. (Also need to let go of the urge to ask questions and want to find out what they did or did not do during my time away from them).

This girl is not LTR material due to her current promiscuous behaviors while still having a bf in an LDR. Even though the bf knows about me and at first said it was ok but lately has gotten jealous about me being around.

I will continue seeing her as I please and look for other plates.
You are splitting hairs my friend. And you can see her all you want and make your own decision. We are all grown men here. But I can tell you that you are fooling yourself if you think you haven't caught feelings. People don't make posts about specific women unless they have invested into that person mentally.

But, I have made plenty of decisions regarding women that I knew weren't the most logically sound in the past too. So glass houses, stones, and such as they say.
 

Lover_boy

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Advice from the old lady:

Agree with @BackInTheGame78 and @Barrister and @Howiestern (all players in their own right, by the way)…. Look. Hot women know the Game cold. You caught feels for a hot chick you can’t have & you are telling yourself (to no avail) that you’re cool.

You aren’t cool. You are dealing with a tigress who is just as dangerous as she is hot.

Date other chicks. This one already owns you (and her BF too).

Brutal (sorry) but true.

Cheers
Lol Thank you but she doesn’t own me
 

Lover_boy

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Hey guys, so I just wanted to run a quick update on this situation and again ask for you guy's insight.

So on Saturday I hung out with this chick, we grabbed food around 6pm and then later went to a local bar. After the bar we continued at my place where we made margaritas, listened to music and even played some truth or dare.

When we got back to my place she asked if had someone over the night before. (My bed is a king size bed, and I left my bed un-made from the previous night, so it appeared as if two people slept in it.) I told her no, and that if I did, I would just tell her the truth. She replied with; "lol ok cause if you did, I wouldn't sleep there".

While playing truth or dare, I received the question of "when was the last time you had sex"? She asked if I had sex in my trip over the new year's holiday or after I got back? I responded with "yeah I had sex while being away on my trip". She took it cool and unbothered, so we continued playing.

The game escalated to heavy make out, a bit of undressing, dirty talking and even some twerking in my kitchen.

However, 1:30am came around and she said she needed to go home and that she couldn't sleep over. She said she had to wake up early the next day and help her mom out with preparing the home for a housewarming party she was hosting. She also said she was on her period and couldn't have s3x.

All of these are true, because I was at her house earlier that day and the house had party ornaments, chips, balloons, etc. Also, when we spoke last Tuesday, she mentioned she hadn't gotten her period and that she was worried about it and that she had bought a pregnancy test just to be safe. She texted me later that night saying she got her period and that the test came out negative.

It still intrigues me to why she decided to not sleep over and cut the night so short. She's never not slept over in the past 3 months that we've been dating unless I asked her not to. I believe the bed being un-made and appearing as if someone was over the night before made her feel some type of way.

The next day I saw her at a rooftop party where a lot of our classmates from dance class were going and she was acting brandnew and a bit cold. Her vibe was off. She left the party, did not say bye or nothing.

So it seems I'm going through a cold pull-back. A combination of not being with her on new years, a new dude in the picture, and maybe a bit of jealousy from false assumptions. She was super loveable and friendly the night before though....

How would you guys handle this? I plan on doing nothing, act as if nothing happened and distance myself as well. Maybe even just drop her for good.
 

Dr.Suave

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How would you guys handle this? I plan on doing nothing, act as if nothing happened and distance myself as well. Maybe even just drop her for good.
Sounds good so far. Keep us updated.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Hey guys, so I just wanted to run a quick update on this situation and again ask for you guy's insight.

So on Saturday I hung out with this chick, we grabbed food around 6pm and then later went to a local bar. After the bar we continued at my place where we made margaritas, listened to music and even played some truth or dare.

When we got back to my place she asked if had someone over the night before. (My bed is a king size bed, and I left my bed un-made from the previous night, so it appeared as if two people slept in it.) I told her no, and that if I did, I would just tell her the truth. She replied with; "lol ok cause if you did, I wouldn't sleep there".

While playing truth or dare, I received the question of "when was the last time you had sex"? She asked if I had sex in my trip over the new year's holiday or after I got back? I responded with "yeah I had sex while being away on my trip". She took it cool and unbothered, so we continued playing.

The game escalated to heavy make out, a bit of undressing, dirty talking and even some twerking in my kitchen.

However, 1:30am came around and she said she needed to go home and that she couldn't sleep over. She said she had to wake up early the next day and help her mom out with preparing the home for a housewarming party she was hosting. She also said she was on her period and couldn't have s3x.

All of these are true, because I was at her house earlier that day and the house had party ornaments, chips, balloons, etc. Also, when we spoke last Tuesday, she mentioned she hadn't gotten her period and that she was worried about it and that she had bought a pregnancy test just to be safe. She texted me later that night saying she got her period and that the test came out negative.

It still intrigues me to why she decided to not sleep over and cut the night so short. She's never not slept over in the past 3 months that we've been dating unless I asked her not to. I believe the bed being un-made and appearing as if someone was over the night before made her feel some type of way.

The next day I saw her at a rooftop party where a lot of our classmates from dance class were going and she was acting brandnew and a bit cold. Her vibe was off. She left the party, did not say bye or nothing.

So it seems I'm going through a cold pull-back. A combination of not being with her on new years, a new dude in the picture, and maybe a bit of jealousy from false assumptions. She was super loveable and friendly the night before though....

How would you guys handle this? I plan on doing nothing, act as if nothing happened and distance myself as well. Maybe even just drop her for good.
Maybe she is wanting to be your girlfriend and trying to make you jealous and is getting irritated it's not working.

3 months is around the time many women either decide they are going to be in it for the long haul with you or cut bait.
 

Barrister

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Maybe she is wanting to be your girlfriend and trying to make you jealous and is getting irritated it's not working.

3 months is around the time many women either decide they are going to be in it for the long haul with you or cut bait.
I would bank on this as well. She wants to be exclusive so she is seeing if you come running after. If you do, you will get a talking to about how she isn't a slvt and isn't going to part of your rotation and wants your commitment if she is going to keep seeing you.

If you choose not to pursue right now, you will see her disappear. Note, I am not saying you should pursue. That depends on what you want.
 

Lover_boy

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These are good assumptions, but keep in mind that her real bf is coming back to the states in early February and they will be moving in together in a small town in Arizona. Its set in stone and everything, in the meantime she's been dating me (and others) and according to her words, "Did her best to not get attached".
 

Stanley

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These are good assumptions, but keep in mind that her real bf is coming back to the states in early February and they will be moving in together in a small town in Arizona. Its set in stone and everything, in the meantime she's been dating me (and others) and according to her words, "Did her best to not get attached".
Then drop her? I don't want to sound rude here, but what the h*** are you wanting from her? Seriously. She's 21 and certainly sounds like it. Nothing you've said about this girl even remotely resembles ltr material so what's going on? You're still getting your piece of the pie with sex and that's what a 'plate' is for? Have you genuinely caught feelings for this girl? Because that is what it sounds like brother. And if she's going to leave you high and dry for her actual bf and you have caught the feels you will get hurt. Don't date her
 

Lover_boy

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Then drop her? I don't want to sound rude here, but what the h*** are you wanting from her? Seriously. She's 21 and certainly sounds like it. Nothing you've said about this girl even remotely resembles ltr material so what's going on? You're still getting your piece of the pie with sex and that's what a 'plate' is for? Have you genuinely caught feelings for this girl? Because that is what it sounds like brother. And if she's going to leave you high and dry for her actual bf and you have caught the feels you will get hurt. Don't date her
I guess I caught a bit of feelings for her yes. Or maybe just the classic "you want what you can't have" dilema.

Just shaken a bit by her 180 turn in behavior with me.
 

BackInTheGame78

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These are good assumptions, but keep in mind that her real bf is coming back to the states in early February and they will be moving in together in a small town in Arizona. Its set in stone and everything, in the meantime she's been dating me (and others) and according to her words, "Did her best to not get attached".
Trust me when it comes to women nothing is "set in stone".
 
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