Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
^^^^Scars said:I don't think I've ever really uttered the word "hot" in reference to a girl, at least not to her face. I almost always use the word cute, and it works for me. Being called cute yourself isn't bad either. Some girls (not many) are a little more classy/conservative (most of the time it's just an act) and don't want to use the words hott or sexy as a compliment. I believe the word you're looking for is handsome. Once you hear that, you're golden brotha.
Don't stress about it too much. It's still a compliment none the less. She's telling you that you aren't hideously ugly, so get on it!
-Scars
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
+1 rep.......however,it's 6:30 in the morning,so I'll drop in my two copper heads....Sofomore said:dude J"Playa" you make some of the dumbest threads, i swear
Same, except I get called "sweet" by said girl. We fvckin tonight too. Last words she said to me last weekend were, "Awwww, you're so sweet.."MurdocIsGod said:Lol at some of the responses. I get called cute (as in the sweet puppy dog "cute") by a girl I **** practically every day so yeah...
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
^This.Igetit! said:+1 rep.......however,it's 6:30 in the morning,so I'll drop in my two copper heads....
I think the context under which she says it determines if it's a good thing or not.
If you two don't know each other,and she says it to one of her friends talking about you,that's a GOOD thing.
If you two know each other,and she tells one of her friends or someone else she thinks you're cute,that's good as well.
If she DIRECTLY tells you she thinks you cute UNSOLICITED,meaning she told you she thinks you're cute when you haven't done or said ANYTHING to show any type of interest in her,that's GOOD. However....
If she says it DIRECTLY to you as a response to you asking her out,chances are,that's bad.
ANYTIME a woman gives you a compliment when you ask her out,it's generally a bad thing. Like if you ask her out and she goes...
"I think you're great" or
"I think you're really a nice guy" or
"I think you're sweet".........
Basically if you ask a girl out,and her response is to start giving you compliments instead of just saying yes,it's bad. So if she calls you "cute" immediately after asking her out,then yeah,I'd say that's a bad thing.
Personally,I'd rather overhear her telling someone she thinks I'm cute to than for her to say it DIRECTLY to me.
I used to say "Interesting. I slept with the last woman who said that to me."Tyson420 said:You heard right. Not even girls like being called cute why the **** should you?
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.