Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

In between a married couples battle for son.

threeforfree

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 17, 2022
Messages
225
Reaction score
316
Age
52
This isn't just about dating a single mom... which already comes with enough pitfalls.

Add ex-trouble. Add that she doesn't have at least 50/50 custody which is very strange for a woman unless there's a good reason. Add alcoholism. Add psychosis.

And this is just what we've heard in a few posts from him.

Yeah she is pleasant to be around. You think that a nice woman without all that baggage wouldn't be pleasant to be around??
 

kavi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2022
Messages
726
Reaction score
624
Age
39
From my exp ALL women can mess up your life and I dont even think alcohol, psychosis, past children even correlate with bad outcomes for men.

I think in the Manosphere there has been COPE regarding how bad things are and the cope is to get a GOOD woman. But that advice doesnt seem to have helped men as it has been put out there for 15 years and I dont see it working out. Both my brother and cousin married such 'good' and traditional women but they still got burned in divorce.

I think to critisize this woman is to elevate other 'normal' women.

All women are the same imo. It is just how men deal with women that truly affect outcomes.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
12,981
Reaction score
13,886
From my exp ALL women can mess up your life and I dont even think alcohol, psychosis, past children even correlate with bad outcomes for men.

I think in the Manosphere there has been COPE regarding how bad things are and the cope is to get a GOOD woman. But that advice doesnt seem to have helped men as it has been put out there for 15 years and I dont see it working out. Both my brother and cousin married such 'good' and traditional women but they still got burned in divorce.

I think to critisize this woman is to elevate other 'normal' women.

All women are the same imo. It is just how men deal with women that truly affect outcomes.
Why not just throw in murderers and thieves too?

Being good and traditional only means something if the woman is ACTUALLY like that and not simply playing a role for her family because that's what she thinks she has to do.

People will always become who they are sooner or later no matter how they were raised. It's the man's job to determine if it's all a rouse or of it's who she really is.
 

Rainman4707

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
1,586
Reaction score
513
Being with an alcoholic isn't lovely. Take off the rose colored glasses.

Let's see what you think in 6 months.
Yeah, i'm aware of this. When i first went exclusive with her, i had a feeling it would'nt last the week.
 

Rainman4707

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
1,586
Reaction score
513
Most ppl out there in the manosphere cannot help you. Manoshpere advice is usually to eject and find a submissive, pure, childlress unicorn.

I cannot give you advice about this situation as I dont know how to help women who have lost custody. If she is nice and you enjoy her company then you can continue it, probably things will settle down as these custody battles and divorce usually become stable afaik, so you can wait it out and tolerate the current drinking.

Other than that what kind of advice can anyone give you? Men here are telling you to eject even though you seem happy with this girl overall but most relationships have issues and come to an end so if you enjoy being with someone then just make the most of it i guess or leave now i dunno if you want this to be long term or str.
Why i ask in bold in my OP is because she is hinting at going to see her son, she thinks the husband will get very angry and she is scared of him (although she is embarrased to admit to it) I was just after some advice from posters who have been in a similar position. I told her that i will go with her so her husband cannot hurt her.

Appreciate the reply man. You are the first person that has actually answered my question.

i will see how this plays out.
 

Rainman4707

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
1,586
Reaction score
513
I doubt it. This is the sign of a desperate guy that takes whatever they can get no matter how flawed it is. Unless you are going for 2-4s.
I have had sex with a LOT of women. Some 9's some 8's some 4's.
 

threeforfree

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 17, 2022
Messages
225
Reaction score
316
Age
52
You're going to go with her to get the kid and serve as her bodyguard, with the whole ex/babydaddy dynamic going on??

This isn't going to end well at all.
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
3,914
Reaction score
702
Age
50
Been in a LTR with a girl for a couple month now. There are red flags before I agreed to be exclusive with her. I feel a real connection to her, but mainly I enjoy her company. The day we became exclusive I had ended up meeting her parents. They were real nice to me and made my dinner.

Im just after some advice. She is an alcoholic. She is still married. Her son lives with her husband and his new girlfriend. My girl is very upset about not being able to see her son. She says her ex is very controlling and that he also stopped his previous girlfriend from seeing her son. My girl says a big part of why she drinks is because she is upset by not seeing her son.

Anybody been in this situation where your girl is in a battle to get her child back? I know she has a lot of baggage. I'm 38...i've fuc*ed lots of women over the last 4 years,,,,,so happy enough enjoying this girl for a while, i can eject any time.
We often find ourselves trying to "white knight" women. You could keep this women in your rotation but it seems like too much of a headache for a long term relationship. You know her better than us to determine whether it is truly worth it.
 

Bandolero

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2019
Messages
231
Reaction score
204
Location
Germany
Why i ask in bold in my OP is because she is hinting at going to see her son, she thinks the husband will get very angry and she is scared of him (although she is embarrased to admit to it) I was just after some advice from posters who have been in a similar position. I told her that i will go with her so her husband cannot hurt her.

Appreciate the reply man. You are the first person that has actually answered my question.

i will see how this plays out.
Not a friend of mine , but from my cousin got with a single mom ... He even moved to her city / birth town .

They did enjoy each other and it seemed like everything was going to work out .

The father of her children was not a fan of this situation and tried him several times , but he was big and would always go out as the " winner "

until he got stabbed over 50 times .

Don't go to another man's territory where kids are involved and expect any rational thought from him.

Wish you the best
 

Rainman4707

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
1,586
Reaction score
513
Not a friend of mine , but from my cousin got with a single mom ... He even moved to her city / birth town .

They did enjoy each other and it seemed like everything was going to work out .

The father of her children was not a fan of this situation and tried him several times , but he was big and would always go out as the " winner "

until he got stabbed over 50 times .

Don't go to another man's territory where kids are involved and expect any rational thought from him.

Wish you the best
He is dropping child of at her parents. So i dont view it as his territory. She was pouring her heart out saying she wants to see her son. If father rocks up making trouble..so be it...but if he ever tries to lay a finger on her....i will kill HIM.

You're right in what you're saying though..he might resort to weapons. Thats why i will keep a hammer close by.
 

Billtx49

Moderator
Joined
May 23, 2013
Messages
6,089
Reaction score
5,486
Location
DFW
He is dropping child of at her parents. So i dont view it as his territory. She was pouring her heart out saying she wants to see her son.
If she can’t exit her parents residence for any reason with her son, then the court has ruled that she’s not of suitable character or mental fitness to be left alone with the child …
Mentally healthy mothers usually get managing conservator custody.
 

threeforfree

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 17, 2022
Messages
225
Reaction score
316
Age
52
If father rocks up making trouble..so be it...but if he ever tries to lay a finger on her....i will kill HIM.

You're right in what you're saying though..he might resort to weapons. Thats why i will keep a hammer close by.
Now you're articulating that you're willing to go to prison... perhaps for a long time, since you've now stated that you won't have a problem with killing him... for this woman.

I hope this is either a troll post or you wake up.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
12,981
Reaction score
13,886
Yeah, i'm aware of this. When i first went exclusive with her, i had a feeling it would'nt last the week.
He is dropping child of at her parents. So i dont view it as his territory. She was pouring her heart out saying she wants to see her son. If father rocks up making trouble..so be it...but if he ever tries to lay a finger on her....i will kill HIM.

You're right in what you're saying though..he might resort to weapons. Thats why i will keep a hammer close by.
You are a fvcking idiot then and deserve anything that happens...

No idea why men want to inject themselves into situations they have no business being in and try and act the hero.

You will find out pretty quickly you are far more likely to be the fool than the hero.

This is high level simp sh!t right here.
 
Last edited:

Rainman4707

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
1,586
Reaction score
513
If she can’t exit her parents residence for any reason with her son, then the court has ruled that she’s not of suitable character or mental fitness to be left alone with the child …
Mentally healthy mothers usually get managing conservator custody.
No court ruling. It' a complicated situation. Im not gonna go into any more details.
 

2Rocky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
2,540
Reaction score
2,835
Age
49
How To End A Relationship With An Alcoholic
Last Updated: Feb 25th 2022

Reviewed by Brittany Polansky, MSW, LCSW

South Florida Drug Rehab » How To End A Relationship With An Alcoholic

Being in a relationship with an alcoholic, whether it’s romantic or otherwise, can be very
emotionally taxing and exhausting. If you’re in a relationship with someone who has an alcohol
abuse problem and you think it might be time to end it, you might be nervous about the
outcome. A person who is addicted to alcohol likely has little control of their actions and
emotions, so it’s possible that they will react negatively if somebody ends their relationship. It’s
natural for those who plan to break up with an alcoholic to hold off on ending things because
they want to protect both themselves and the person they’re in a relationship with. However,
breaking things off might end up being the most healthy decision for both people involved.
JUMP TO A SECTION...
What It’s Like to Be In A Relationship With An Alcoholic
It can be very difficult to maintain any type of personal relationship with an alcoholic, let alone a
romantic companionship. Individuals with alcoholism commonly display unpredictable or
dangerous behavior, which may pose problems for romantic relationships. People with
alcoholism are also more likely than others to be unfaithful or lie to their partner/spouse.
If you’ve ever been in a relationship with an alcoholic, you’ve probably found yourself worrying
about where they are, what they’re doing, and who they’re doing it with. You might have even
covered for them, made excuses, or lied on their behalf a few times because you want to protect
them. Chances are, you even blame yourself for some of their uncontrollable actions. But the
key thing to remember is that your partner’s abuse has nothing to do with you. It is easy to take
some of the blame if you’re around someone frequently, but their alcoholism is not your fault.
There is nothing you can do to save them or stop them from engaging in dangerous behaviors.
There is also nothing you can do to change a person with alcoholism, as much as you may want
to fix them. All you can do is take care of yourself and make your own needs a priority.
When It’s Time to Leave Someone With Alcohol Abuse
Since alcohol is a disease, one person should not end things with another purely because they have been afflicted with this disorder. However, it is completely understandable for someone to break it off with an alcoholic if they feel like the relationship is hurting one or both of the individuals involved. Here are some signs that it might be time to break up with an alcoholic:
  • If there is any verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse
  • When you feel like you have to control them
  • If they say they will get help but keep putting it off
  • They are unfaithful or dishonest to you
  • If they display no desire to change or get help
  • If there are financial issues with no regard for improvement
  • If you start to become codependent on them
  • If they are repeatedly lying to you and others
  • If they get a DUI, end up in jail, or otherwise ruin their life
It is important to remember that you cannot help someone just by loving them or putting them first. You may feel like you can put someone on the right path, but they can only get on that path if they choose to walk on it themselves. Once they’re on the path, they’ll need assistance from a trained substance abuse counselor to truly help them keep inching closer toward recovery.
How Should You End Things With An Alcoholic?
There is, unfortunately, no “right” way to break up with an alcoholic. However, there are some key things to remember if you plan to end your romantic relationship with someone who has alcoholism.
Here are some tips to keep in mind before ending things with an alcoholic: First, make a concrete decision about the break-up. Going back and forth could be harmful to both individuals in the relationship. Then, when talking to them, try to be gentle and understanding of their disease. Have an open and honest dialogue with them about the state of your relationship and how their actions have made you feel. If necessary, it may be helpful to get a counselor or relationship therapist to get involved in the conversation.
Taking Care Of Yourself After The Relationship
Above everything, make sure to take care of yourself if you currently are or previously were in a relationship with an alcoholic. Do not take any harmful or rude behavior they display as a reflection of who you are. Try your best to look into your future and let go of any guilt from the past. To fully move on from being in a relationship with an alcoholic and learn how to put yourself first, it may be beneficial to attend therapy on your own. Therapy will give you the opportunity to develop tools to help you live a healthy life free of burden, guilt, or heartbreak.
Want more tips for how to end a relationship with an alcoholic? Contact our team of alcohol abuse treatment specialists to learn more. Give us a call at (866) 971-5531 for more information.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
12,981
Reaction score
13,886
Enjoy a beautiful loving future with this woman and child after you murder the kid's dad. I'm sure they will see you as a hero.
More likely he will do everything for her and then find out one day she has been cheating on him the whole time. Women don't respect men who try to fix their problems like it's their job.
 
Top