In between a married couples battle for son.

jaymbrs

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My ex was an alcoholic. Even when she said she quit, she would get drunk when I wasn’t there. Then she lied about it. I would find half empty vodka bottles in her freezer and she would make some BS up. Then she lied some more. Pretty soon I didn’t know what to believe and couldn’t trust her. You’re also not a trained psychologist who can help her. You will try though and get frustrated. This is the path you will end up walking.
 

BackInTheGame78

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My ex was an alcoholic. Even when she said she quit, she would get drunk when I wasn’t there. Then she lied about it. I would find half empty vodka bottles in her freezer and she would make some BS up. Then she lied some more. Pretty soon I didn’t know what to believe and couldn’t trust her. You’re also not a trained psychologist who can help her. You will try though and get frustrated. This is the path you will end up walking.
Everyone always thinks their situation will be different. Until they realize it isn't after it's too late.
 

Billtx49

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No court ruling. It' a complicated situation. Im not gonna go into any more details.
So no family court is involved, or a case is ongoing, and your thread title starts with: In between a married couples battle …
She needs an attorney and you need maximum distance from getting involved in a situation like this.
With alcoholism involved, you’ve got a bomb with a very short fuse on your hands…
 

BackInTheGame78

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Why i ask in bold in my OP is because she is hinting at going to see her son, she thinks the husband will get very angry and she is scared of him (although she is embarrased to admit to it) I was just after some advice from posters who have been in a similar position. I told her that i will go with her so her husband cannot hurt her.

Appreciate the reply man. You are the first person that has actually answered my question.

i will see how this plays out.
Never interject yourself in situations like this. Never.

That's what the police are for. If she is scared have the police come with her. You stay out of
it or you will soon regret it.

But I know...you got this right? You are going to "be there for her" right?

You clearly are seeing what you want to see. I feel bad for you. You don't even know how simpish your behavior really is to be able to change it.
 

Machine10033

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His handle is Rainman.... I am hoping this post was one huge troll on this forum. Single mom... alcoholic.... and a guy looking for advice on how to navigate a ridiculous custody situation.

If this post is legit you navigate one way.... you do what Tiger woods did. You tell her your going on vacation... have an Uber pick her up... and then when she’s gone change the locks... change your number, and pretend this never happened
 

BackInTheGame78

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His handle is Rainman.... I am hoping this post was one huge troll on this forum. Single mom... alcoholic.... and a guy looking for advice on how to navigate a ridiculous custody situation.

If this post is legit you navigate one way.... you do what Tiger woods did. You tell her your going on vacation... have an Uber pick her up... and then when she’s gone change the locks... change your number, and pretend this never happened
Then get sued for $30 mil
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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I looked up to past posts from you with some regard and seeing this is really some hustling backwards type of sh1t from your part.
I’m saying this in good faith.
If she smoked some flower here and there ok cool but a habitual alky is just not on par with a high value man who is constantly thriving in this fvcked up world.
Now a days I rather have my peace of mind undisturbed and in tact even if means losing a woman.
May your intuition and grit guide you to see the light because you will need it.
 

Pedrito0906

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So more than a month has past, what was the outcome of this field report? Did she end up seeing her children? Did you do something to the guy?
 

Rainman4707

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So more than a month has past, what was the outcome of this field report? Did she end up seeing her children? Did you do something to the guy?
No,,not seeing kid,,,it's complicated. Her health has improved. She is focusing on me and improving her mental health. She has improved vastly!!

The guy has a reputation of being aggressive, so i was just asking original question because i envision a scenario where he steps on my turf. When he does i will take him out.
 

BackInTheGame78

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No,,not seeing kid,,,it's complicated. Her health has improved. She is focusing on me and improving her mental health. She has improved vastly!!

The guy has a reputation of being aggressive, so i was just asking original question because i envision a scenario where he steps on my turf. When he does i will take him out.
Lmao...wow what a deal you got. A woman who cares more about a random dude she is dating than her own kid.

It's not complicated, she is just trash you are tying to make into something shiny like gold. Too bad she is fool's gold.
 
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Gamisch

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Yes. Women will eject a man real easy , degrading him to soley a sperm donor. If you as a man comply, then that's it. She'll have 18 years to paint a picture of you.

While your kid only has,one youth and one father. When you're 60+ you'll regret not fighting for your kids



This is an interesting topic about attachment to children. Seems to happen alot to men and women in divorce. I can undersand womens attachment to children but for men I dont think it is normal. What do you guys think about this? Should men even battle for custody or care about their children. At the end of the day all children will grow up and leave you and every1 will die alone anyway. I know that sounds grim but it does seem to me that these men seem to need their children more for their own attachment than for the benefit of the child.
From my exp ALL women can mess up your life and I dont even think alcohol, psychosis, past children even correlate with bad outcomes for men.

I think in the Manosphere there has been COPE regarding how bad things are and the cope is to get a GOOD woman. But that advice doesnt seem to have helped men as it has been put out there for 15 years and I dont see it working out. Both my brother and cousin married such 'good' and traditional women but they still got burned in divorce.

I think to critisize this woman is to elevate other 'normal' women.

All women are the same imo. It is just how men deal with women that truly affect outcomes.
I agree . The manosphere can be toxic at times. When you've been through enough sloots, you'll have to admit that they all have a redflag here and there. But still you as a man decide how many red flags are too much. 1 or 10?
 

Gamisch

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@Rainman4707 . I understand we all roast OP, but gentlemen THESE are the real life issues that might appear in your life by simply swiping right. You are one swipe away from a problematic woman. You cant make this shyte up. You'll never know what and how a woman will surprise you. After more than 150 women they still manage to surprise me in ways I've never heard of or seen before.

Alcoholism seems to be more of a male than a female problem. As you see, soon as a woman has this problem it's ten times more ugly. Add a kid and a toxic ex/relationship to the mix and there's a crime passionell waiting for you.

Oh yeah. Stop talking tough boi. Talking about weaponizing yourself to defend this woman. You're willing to spend years in prison at best or go six feet deep at worst over a woman that is at the bottom of the barrel?

If you do like her, tell her that you're willing to stand by her but you DEMAND she will drop the alcohol. Thats not negotiable. Thats a hard demand, starting today with clear consequences of she doesn't comply.
 

Rainman4707

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@Rainman4707 . I understand we all roast OP, but gentlemen THESE are the real life issues that might appear in your life by simply swiping right. You are one swipe away from a problematic woman. You cant make this shyte up. You'll never know what and how a woman will surprise you. After more than 150 women they still manage to surprise me in ways I've never heard of or seen before.

Alcoholism seems to be more of a male than a female problem. As you see, soon as a woman has this problem it's ten times more ugly. Add a kid and a toxic ex/relationship to the mix and there's a crime passionell waiting for you.

Oh yeah. Stop talking tough boi. Talking about weaponizing yourself to defend this woman. You're willing to spend years in prison at best or go six feet deep at worst over a woman that is at the bottom of the barrel?

If you do like her, tell her that you're willing to stand by her but you DEMAND she will drop the alcohol. Thats not negotiable. Thats a hard demand, starting today with clear consequences of she doesn't comply.
I've been through loads of women. I've spent years looking for someone. I really like this woman. and am enjoying her feminine company. I have really clicked with this woman. To me it's one of those women that comes round once or twice in a lifetime. Yeah she has a lot of baggage, but i'm willing to give this woman a chance. Like i say she is such a lovely person.

She is aware of how i feel about the alcohol. To her credit, her health has vastly improved since she met me. She knows if she is drunk a lot, i will walk, thats why she has improved a lot. She knows it wont be easy, but she's giving it a hell of a shot. I'm not willing to drop her when she is doing so well.

She is my girl. She is sacred of him. If he invades my personal space, i will do what any man would do and stand his ground.

I have been warned, so yeah more fool me.
 

Gamisch

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I've been through loads of women. I've spent years looking for someone. I really like this woman. and am enjoying her feminine company. I have really clicked with this woman. To me it's one of those women that comes round once or twice in a lifetime. Yeah she has a lot of baggage, but i'm willing to give this woman a chance. Like i say she is such a lovely person.

She is aware of how i feel about the alcohol. To her credit, her health has vastly improved since she met me. She knows if she is drunk a lot, i will walk, thats why she has improved a lot. She knows it wont be easy, but she's giving it a hell of a shot. I'm not willing to drop her when she is doing so well.

She is my girl. She is sacred of him. If he invades my personal space, i will do what any man would do and stand his ground.

I have been warned, so yeah more fool me.
Prisons and graveyards are filled with heroes and fools. Can be interchangeable , because the fool in prison could as we be the hero in his grave...

You can stand YOUR ground ,but this is HER ground..your ground should be what i wrote before: demand improvement. By doing this you'll show her more love than by fighting her baby daddy,i hope you are able to grasp that...
 

Rainman4707

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Prisons and graveyards are filled with heroes and fools. Can be interchangeable , because the fool in prison could as we be the hero in his grave...

You can stand YOUR ground ,but this is HER ground..your ground should be what i wrote before: demand improvement. By doing this you'll show her more love than by fighting her baby daddy,i hope you are able to grasp that...
I have demanded improvement. She is fully aware..she has to be who i want her to be.

I wont fight her battle. I keep out of it. All im saying is if he tries to hurt her in a physical way or he goes to far trying to intimidate her, i will step in. From what i have heard, his family including him are arrogant bullys who likes control.
 

Epimanes

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If you love and care for this woman genuinely... and want to help her. You have a long road ahead. Her love for drinking will overpower her love for you. She has to want to get help.... and maybe you can encourage her. There is no hope of her seeing or earning visits with her son until that is dealt with. She will HAVE to get sober... no way around it. It's also likely the reason she can't see her son like she wants to.

Good luck.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I have demanded improvement. She is fully aware..she has to be who i want her to be.

I wont fight her battle. I keep out of it. All im saying is if he tries to hurt her in a physical way or he goes to far trying to intimidate her, i will step in. From what i have heard, his family including him are arrogant bullys who likes control.
And that is who she WANTS. You will find out soon enough that when a person tells you who they are you should always believe it.
 

Murk

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To me it's one of those women that comes round once or twice in a lifetime.
Yep, I'm holding out to find my alcoholic divorced single mother who can't get custody of her kid.

I believe there is one waiting for every one of us, somewhere out there.
 

Gamisch

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I have demanded improvement. She is fully aware..she has to be who i want her to be.

I wont fight her battle. I keep out of it. All im saying is if he tries to hurt her in a physical way or he goes to far trying to intimidate her, i will step in. From what i have heard, his family including him are arrogant bullys who likes control.
"Who i want her to be"? Why dont you look for someone who is more like that by default? You said she was "almost perfect " fèw posts ago..

"From what i have heard, his family including him are arrogant bullys who likes control."

I hope you also have such a down azz fam as back up for when things get really rough...a hammer wont save you bruh .

So i assume she already made an appointment with an AA type of organization? A simple appointment/ intake will take weeks, but at least its proves she ain't playing.

Assuming you demanded this yeserday already...did you?
 
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