Kineti[C]harm
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 16, 2003
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no never.Originally posted by Deathfyre
Everyone's done it, you're nothing special
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I fvcked a bush-pig
- Thread starter Mr.Hash wid da Stash
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
If she's got a nice figure, she can't be
all that bad. Can she? Anyway, this gal sounds like she's got alot of problems - just tell her you're not that interested in her (you were drunk the night before) but you appreciate her interest.
all that bad. Can she? Anyway, this gal sounds like she's got alot of problems - just tell her you're not that interested in her (you were drunk the night before) but you appreciate her interest.
Aztec
Master Don Juan
I can't believe I missed this one. This is probably one of the funniest stories in here I've ever come across.
Awesome!Originally posted by ShizamDaMan
Wrap a flag around her face, and do it for your country.
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
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- 1,887
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LOL
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
myfriendblu
Master Don Juan
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- Feb 5, 2003
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ewww man....been there done that got the painful yet somewhat hilarious memories to prove it.
Eh, chalk it up to experience bro. Heeheheheh
Eh, chalk it up to experience bro. Heeheheheh
GirlCrazy
Master Don Juan
There's always "Face down, ass up"
Absolutely classic. Now every time I see a really ugly chick I'll have the national anthem stuck in my head!
This is one of the funniest stories (and replies) I've ever read!
The most horrifying thing I've experienced is that I HAD to sleep next to UG 2 that was snoring a little. She is a good friend of my step sister, so I don't want to hurt her at any level...
I sneaked to sleep on those leather TV armchairs later though.
I also can't believe how desperate guys we have here...
"I would keep her as a fvckbuddy"
"I would go for it." etc.
Come on! she's a butt ugly biatch who has slept with over 60 guys!!
The most horrifying thing I've experienced is that I HAD to sleep next to UG 2 that was snoring a little. She is a good friend of my step sister, so I don't want to hurt her at any level...
I sneaked to sleep on those leather TV armchairs later though.
I also can't believe how desperate guys we have here...
"I would keep her as a fvckbuddy"
"I would go for it." etc.
Come on! she's a butt ugly biatch who has slept with over 60 guys!!
ShizamDaMan
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2003
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- 1,113
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Wow, way to ressurect a dead thread guys.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
squirrels
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2003
- Messages
- 6,620
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- 47
F**king Aztec...stop bumping threads from last year. Turn your computer off for 5 minutes (I know you've probably never done this before so just click Start->Turn Off Computer->Shut down) and GET A F**KING LIFE!!
Helter Skelter
Master Don Juan
This comes from a man with 3024 posts