Kineti[C]harm
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 16, 2003
- Messages
- 1,520
- Reaction score
- 2
no never.Originally posted by Deathfyre
Everyone's done it, you're nothing special
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I fvcked a bush-pig
- Thread starter Mr.Hash wid da Stash
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
If she's got a nice figure, she can't be
all that bad. Can she? Anyway, this gal sounds like she's got alot of problems - just tell her you're not that interested in her (you were drunk the night before) but you appreciate her interest.
all that bad. Can she? Anyway, this gal sounds like she's got alot of problems - just tell her you're not that interested in her (you were drunk the night before) but you appreciate her interest.
Aztec
Master Don Juan
I can't believe I missed this one. This is probably one of the funniest stories in here I've ever come across.
Awesome!Originally posted by ShizamDaMan
Wrap a flag around her face, and do it for your country.
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
- Messages
- 1,887
- Reaction score
- 12
LOL
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
myfriendblu
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2003
- Messages
- 907
- Reaction score
- 0
ewww man....been there done that got the painful yet somewhat hilarious memories to prove it.
Eh, chalk it up to experience bro. Heeheheheh
Eh, chalk it up to experience bro. Heeheheheh
GirlCrazy
Master Don Juan
There's always "Face down, ass up"
Absolutely classic. Now every time I see a really ugly chick I'll have the national anthem stuck in my head!
This is one of the funniest stories (and replies) I've ever read!
The most horrifying thing I've experienced is that I HAD to sleep next to UG 2 that was snoring a little. She is a good friend of my step sister, so I don't want to hurt her at any level...
I sneaked to sleep on those leather TV armchairs later though.
I also can't believe how desperate guys we have here...
"I would keep her as a fvckbuddy"
"I would go for it." etc.
Come on! she's a butt ugly biatch who has slept with over 60 guys!!
The most horrifying thing I've experienced is that I HAD to sleep next to UG 2 that was snoring a little. She is a good friend of my step sister, so I don't want to hurt her at any level...
I sneaked to sleep on those leather TV armchairs later though.
I also can't believe how desperate guys we have here...
"I would keep her as a fvckbuddy"
"I would go for it." etc.
Come on! she's a butt ugly biatch who has slept with over 60 guys!!
ShizamDaMan
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2003
- Messages
- 1,113
- Reaction score
- 3
Wow, way to ressurect a dead thread guys.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
squirrels
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2003
- Messages
- 6,620
- Reaction score
- 186
- Age
- 47
F**king Aztec...stop bumping threads from last year. Turn your computer off for 5 minutes (I know you've probably never done this before so just click Start->Turn Off Computer->Shut down) and GET A F**KING LIFE!!
Helter Skelter
Master Don Juan
This comes from a man with 3024 posts