Dukester
Master Don Juan
this is just for reference, no logical reason for doing this...
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
How Much?
- Thread starter Dukester
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Dark Nimbus
Senior Don Juan
Wtf?!?? Some of you would spend more then $50 on a first date? Even if I had the money I wouldn't spend more then $5-10 on a first date. I wonder how much better your chances of getting laid with the average girl are if you spend sick money on her during the first date. I'm guessing not much better then mine though...
rgeere
Master Don Juan
The only dates I go on are the ones where I have to run some random errand and the girl is along for the ride.
This means that however much I spend, I spend it on myself. I don't go out on dates "just for her" like a lot of AFCs believe that have to do.
This means that however much I spend, I spend it on myself. I don't go out on dates "just for her" like a lot of AFCs believe that have to do.
CapiCrimini
Master Don Juan
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what do you mean?
I always try to fit her into my schedule when I go on a date. Meaning if I'm going to so-and-so to get whatever and blah-blah-cafe` is on the way. I'd ask her to stop by there on the way.[well that would be what I would do if I actually went anywhere to do stuff.
]But errand to me means a car ride to the post-office to drop off a letter...?
Could you explain.
--EDIT--
I also havn't ever spent more then $20 on a girl for a date myself. The most I've ever spent was $30 and that was more my parents. She came with me to a theme park. Wasn't really a first date though.
As always offer to pay for her half, if she says she'll pay let her...
Anyway. $5-$10 sounds right.[including your expense.]
rgeere
Master Don Juan
Yeah, you are spending time with her while doing things that you would do normally. Meaning you don't go out of the way to do anything with her.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
CapiCrimini
Master Don Juan
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GIRL: So when are we going out?
YOU: I crap at 5:01pm...ummm... so If you could be there at 5:00 I think I could fit in a five minute-r... sound good?
GIRL: Sounds great!
I got you though regree.
MrCode
Senior Don Juan
I once spent $80 on a first date (dinner at some fancy-ass restaurant.) The chic really liked me and spending that kind of cash was completely pointless, but I didn't know then what I know now.
I could have totally banged that chic, but didn't because I didn't like her that much. I was also a major AFC.
Now a first date is coffee at the most, or just walking around or doing errands, rgeere-style.
I could have totally banged that chic, but didn't because I didn't like her that much. I was also a major AFC.
Now a first date is coffee at the most, or just walking around or doing errands, rgeere-style.
Dukester
Master Don Juan
i only spend about 5-15, maybe 20, depending on how much i like the girl, and how much she likes me
for those that spend over $50, u guys must be on crack!
for those that spend over $50, u guys must be on crack!