"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
How have u gotten over "LOVE" ?
- Thread starter Climax
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
This simple answer is TIME. The thing that got me past 'her' was finally realizing that based on what happened, I can never take her back and keep my self respect. This of course is situation specific.Originally posted by aequitas
How many of you have actually been in love and then had to get over that girl that u loved?
Please tell your stories of how you got over your "love" for her here
Laterz....
Matt Rogers
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 18, 2003
- Messages
- 618
- Reaction score
- 4
I fell in love with a girl and dated her for a few weeks and she cut off contact with me. Now I know I hardly knew the girl-but I fell hard for her.
For the first few weeks I felt awful. I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't stop thinking about her. I kept replaying everything over in my mind, thinking how I could have saved the relationship and beating myself up over all my mistakes. I was a wreck and spent my time moping around, drinking and composing love poetry and love songs. Even produced an album of songs.
After that I realised I was wasting my time pining over her, and that I had to channel my energy into improving myself so that I could attract a girl even better than her. I threw myself into my academic work, my weightlifting and did some major self-reflection identifying why I acted like I did (needy, insecure).
I am still not competely over her, and still harbour a hope that when she sees the "new" me she will want to give things another go, but I am feeling much better.
Frank Zappa
Senior Don Juan
I get the feeling that you (aequinas) have to compare yourself to others to run your life. You really need to start to just worry about yourself. Everyone's life, merits, and gauges are different and your only real comparison is with yourself. Focus on self-improvement with respect to your current and past self.
~Zappa
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
- Messages
- 1,887
- Reaction score
- 12
there is a new record of afcism being broken here every week...
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
- Messages
- 1,887
- Reaction score
- 12
No son, being a don juan is about seducing women and making THEM fall in love with you. it has nothing to do with turning into an over-emotional woman of a man like you seem to be doing...
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
- Messages
- 1,887
- Reaction score
- 12
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
- Messages
- 1,887
- Reaction score
- 12
SpeedRunner
Don Juan
[/thread]
I suggest u rent out a movie called "Don Juan De Marco", then maybe u will see where i am coming from. ( And the movie explains it very well, in a way that words cannot explain what i am trying to say)
and u make it out as if its a BAD thing to fall in love with a woman... well all i can say, is that it is NOT.
There is a big difference between being a "pimp" or a "player" and being a Don Jaun.
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Alen-Delon
Senior Don Juan
SpeedRunner
Don Juan
lol! i heard that was very true.Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
How do you get over a woman? The quickest way I know is to marry her. Heheheh,...
I am with you. Love for me is very different, not losing balls and stuff, just a strong bond to someone. If you revert back to AFC when in love then all this DJ stuff has been a charade. Principles come first.
If that's true then I don't like the main discussion, and def. I don't like making an effort of attracting girls. :]