"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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High specs but zero matches - Dating Apps

Arete

Don Juan
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I don't understand how you get matches.

I tried tinder, bumble, hinge, you name it. I used real pictures and all the bio is true. Admittedly, I had every part a little puffed up, but ... still nothing?

  • 28yo, looks like 16-18 on first picture (very good lighting, nike shirt for extra effect. Normaly I look like 20-24)
  • 1,88m / 6'2 (with shoes)
  • calisthenics athlete, 90kg / 200lbs (while bulking)
  • self-employment involving real estate (small scale)
  • second picture with me outside, using the technique from mens natural physique again (looks much wider from certain angles, especially with clothes on)
  • bio in a nutshell, is something like: "I'm very serious about sports and nutrition. I like philosophy. I used to be a nerd that liked Anime and Manga, but now I'm a manly, yet intellectual adrenalin junkie" ( In reality, I'm still a nerd at heart and I still get easily scared by stuff like heights, even if I'm acting fearless)

Is it the mirror selfie as first picture? Is it because I don't smile in pictures? Because I used only two pictures? Maybe they are too bland and straightforward? Do I have to be verified? Is it because I don't pay money for these apps?

Maybe I overdid it with the age thing or something else? The first picture with "Name, 28, self-employed - real estate" on it looks kind of comical. But is there such a thing as overdoing it in dating apps? I figured I'm competing with people that use AI and Photoshop?

Even if my pictures are trash, I would rate my looks as 6-8 depending on the groom. My biggest flaw currently is being extremely socially awkward with people I meet for the first time. I figured dating apps would negate that. Combined with all the other stuff, I thought this would give the impression of a 8-9?

I don't get it ...
 
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“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Plinco

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Location
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I don't understand how you get matches.

I tried tinder, bumble, hinge, you name it. I used real pictures and all the bio is true. Admittedly, I had every part a little puffed up, but ... still nothing?

  • 28yo, looks like 16-18 on first picture (very good lighting, nike shirt for extra effect. Normaly I look like 20-24)
  • 1,88m / 6'2 (with shoes)
  • calisthenics athlete, 90kg / 200lbs (while bulking)
  • self-employment involving real estate (small scale)
  • second picture with me outside, using the technique from mens natural physique again (looks much wider from certain angles, especially with clothes on)
  • bio in a nutshell, is something like: "I'm very serious about sports and nutrition. I like philosophy. I used to be a nerd that liked Anime and Manga, but now I'm a manly, yet intellectual adrenalin junkie" ( In reality, I'm still a nerd at heart and I still get easily scared by stuff like heights, even if I'm acting fearless)

Is it the mirror selfie as first picture? Is it because I don't smile in pictures? Because I used only two pictures? Maybe they are too bland and straightforward? Do I have to be verified? Is it because I don't pay money for these apps?

Maybe I overdid it with the age thing or something else? The first picture with "Name, 28, self-employed - real estate" on it looks kind of comical. But is there such a thing as overdoing it in dating apps? I figured I'm competing with people that use AI and Photoshop?

Even if my pictures are trash, I would rate my looks as 6-8 depending on the groom. My biggest flaw is being extremely socially awkward with people I meet for the first time. I figured dating apps would negate that. Combined with all the other stuff, I thought this would give the impression of a 8-9?

I don't get it ...
Don't use a mirror selfie as your first pic.

Dating apps are not at all to be taken seriously. I don't think I have a bio description in mine; let them find that stuff out about you when they meet you.

There's also a bs logarithm too, which I can't fully explain but I think I got around that by swiping left on most of the girls anyway.
 

Arete

Don Juan
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Don't use a mirror selfie as your first pic.
What should I do about this?

Try to fix it myself? None/light/heavy AI use? Go to a professional photographer? Or some guy specializing in dating apps?

Dating apps are not at all to be taken seriously. I don't think I have a bio description in mine; let them find that stuff out about you when they meet you.
Minimizing what I write? Removing it (almost) completely?

There's also a bs logarithm too, which I can't fully explain but I think I got around that by swiping left on most of the girls anyway.
I heard about this. But I don't really get it. Might be odd, but I actually read the bio, so my swiping is kind of slow. If it doesn't fit at all, like feminists and stuff, I swiped left, regardless of looks. I probably swiped right at only 10-20%. Is that good or bad practice?

I wondered, am I even swiping on real people?
 
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Plinco

Master Don Juan
Joined
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What should I do about this?

Try to fix it myself? None/light/heavy AI use? Go to a professional photographer? Or some guy specializing in dating apps?



Minimizing what I write? Removing it (almost) completely?



I heard about this. But I don't really get it. Might be odd, but I actually read the bio, so my swiping is kind of slow. If it doesn't fit at all, like feminists and stuff, I swiped left, regardless of looks. I probably swiped right at only 10-20%. Is that good or bad practice?

I wondered, am I even swiping on real people?
Use a different picture as your first, either doing something fun or in a business suit

I would just eliminate your bio, not that it matters too much anyway.

I don't know exactly how those logarithms work. Personally I just use my own filter. I can't tell you how to filter because they are based on your preferences.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Cheeky_James

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2025
Messages
752
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Age
42
I don't understand how you get matches.

I tried tinder, bumble, hinge, you name it. I used real pictures and all the bio is true. Admittedly, I had every part a little puffed up, but ... still nothing?

  • 28yo, looks like 16-18 on first picture (very good lighting, nike shirt for extra effect. Normaly I look like 20-24)
  • 1,88m / 6'2 (with shoes)
  • calisthenics athlete, 90kg / 200lbs (while bulking)
  • self-employment involving real estate (small scale)
  • second picture with me outside, using the technique from mens natural physique again (looks much wider from certain angles, especially with clothes on)
  • bio in a nutshell, is something like: "I'm very serious about sports and nutrition. I like philosophy. I used to be a nerd that liked Anime and Manga, but now I'm a manly, yet intellectual adrenalin junkie" ( In reality, I'm still a nerd at heart and I still get easily scared by stuff like heights, even if I'm acting fearless)

Is it the mirror selfie as first picture? Is it because I don't smile in pictures? Because I used only two pictures? Maybe they are too bland and straightforward? Do I have to be verified? Is it because I don't pay money for these apps?

Maybe I overdid it with the age thing or something else? The first picture with "Name, 28, self-employed - real estate" on it looks kind of comical. But is there such a thing as overdoing it in dating apps? I figured I'm competing with people that use AI and Photoshop?

Even if my pictures are trash, I would rate my looks as 6-8 depending on the groom. My biggest flaw currently is being extremely socially awkward with people I meet for the first time. I figured dating apps would negate that. Combined with all the other stuff, I thought this would give the impression of a 8-9?

I don't get it ...
Send me your pics on pm.
You’re probably over rating your looks or something if that sort. I’ll give you honest feedback.
I’m doing very well on Hinge.
I’m approx 7-7.5 smv guy.
 

BaronOfHair

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@Arete "bio in a nutshell, is something like: "I'm very serious about sports and nutrition. I like philosophy. I used to be a nerd that liked Anime and Manga, but now I'm a manly, yet intellectual adrenalin junkie" ( In reality, I'm still a nerd at heart and I still get easily scared by stuff like heights, even if I'm acting fearless)...

I don't get it ..."

-Using corporate speak like "in a nutshell" may be diminishing your appeal. Encourage you to not "circle back" or "synergize" either

-Claiming "I USED to be an anime and Manga nerd", then following that up by informing readers that you're still "intellectual" and "a nerd heart" who "fears heights" has not just the ladies, but EVERYONE who reads those words envisioning a bloke like THIS
1:58-3:23

More so than a modern day equivalent to The Count Of Monte Cristo
 

BadBoy89

Master Don Juan
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I tried tinder, bumble, hinge, you name it. I used real pictures and all the bio is true. Admittedly, I had every part a little puffed up, but ... still nothing?
  • self-employment involving real estate (small scale)
That is what is hurting you.
 

BillyPilgrim

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Is it the mirror selfie as first picture? Is it because I don't smile in pictures? Because I used only two pictures? Maybe they are too bland and straightforward? Do I have to be verified? Is it because I don't pay money for these apps?
Yes to everything except maybe verfied. Uptight women like that lmao.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
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Sigh ..here's your anwer


Your playing a losing game ,hence why you're feeling..lost.. its like asking " why don't I get rich"..or why dont I win with sports betting?

The ratio male /female is like 75/25. So every women can (In theory) pick out of 3 dudes. Needless to say that the hotter women can pick out of more dudes...

Apps should be SUPPLEMENTARY to your overall dating life. When a man like you depends on it, you will end up frustrated and dumbfounded. The apps are all run by ONE company and that company is now cosies up with the Whitehouse to cement their monopoly and ban users( read it up).

If you ain't that dude ,you ain't that dude...delete the apps and touch grass.

There's NOTHING you can do short term. Nothing , nada, nietsch. Prof pics, AI prompts and manipulated picture, its all obsolete as every AFC does that now...
 

Cheeky_James

Master Don Juan
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Or just show us some pics and let’s make sure it’s definitely fully OVER for you. And it never began.
 

UK manc

Don Juan
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There's NOTHING you can do short term. Nothing , nada, nietsch. Prof pics, AI prompts and manipulated picture, its all obsolete as every AFC does that now...
I see these AFCs in the gym. Two-thirds of blokes hunched over their pathetic screen between sets, doing god knows what. All with the same arm and calf tattoos, **** beard, crap beard....but yeah, just ten more swipes bro and I might just get a match!
 
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