"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Heartbroken over a woman that I wasn't really into

ScottKayman

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Bit of a wierd one, I was with this woman for a few months. If I'm going to be honest I wasn't really in to her but kept the realtionship going because we had amazing sex together. Anyway, she finished it the other day saying I obviosuly wasn't in to her which is fair enough. The problem is now I feel like I really want her. wtf! Why do I feel heartbroken over a woman that I wasn't really into and now feel like I deperately want her back? I know if we did get back together I would probably go back to feeling like I wasn't into her again.
What's going on here?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ThisIsSparta

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What's going on here?
DO you really want her back? Or do you feel something else?(Guilt?)

Maybe, for the time being, you had all you wanted from a woman. Great sex, fun, good company..... now its gone and the alternative is no sex, a quiet home and maybe lonelyness?
 

ScottKayman

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DO you really want her back? Or do you feel something else?(Guilt?)
I feel like I want her back. But maybe that just my mind playing tricks on me. What if we got back together and I felt the same as before?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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mrgoodstuff

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DO you really want her back? Or do you feel something else?(Guilt?)

Maybe, for the time being, you had all you wanted from a woman. Great sex, fun, good company..... now its gone and the alternative is no sex, a quiet home and maybe lonelyness?
Now SHE is gone. The alternative is one of the millions of more compatible ladies that exist.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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mrgoodstuff

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@mrgoodstuff How do you do that?
Time. Once your ego gets crushed... You have to start over. So when you start over you adjust your values. In my situation, I learned that being more honest with myself yielded more strength, but it takes time to develop. However that foundation does not shake apart easily since it's not built on lies... If you are a man whose going to have interactions with women, you have to be honest with yourself about what's good for you, but also what the REALITY in the market has been for the last 10 years... So we can't reorg for a "unicorn" which does not exist. We have to partake in some of the stuff that's really there, but avoiding some of the ones that we know aren't good for us, or minimizing our damage.
 

Lookatu

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All valid points above. You will continue feeling like this until you find another girl. Then the previous one will be nothing but a spec of dust to you most likely.
 
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