"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Do you copy paste this to every girl?
- Thread starter Konada
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
logicallefty
Moderator
"Hey (her first name if she posted it) Lefty here. I looked at your profile and you don't seem like a gold digger or mental case so today is your lucky day, I would like to shoot the sh|t with you. Congrats. Hope to hear from you by the 32nd of this month? Lefty"
"Hey (first name)" - Lets her know you looked at her profile, not just pic. They like that.
"you don't seem like a gold digger or mental case" - A small compliment
"today is your lucky day" - c0cky/funny
"I would like to shoot the sh|t with you" - to the point
"congrats" - confident
"hope to hear from you by the 32nd of the month" - mysterious. Nearly all will ask "What does that mean?" I respond "I am a man of many mysteries, you will have to talk to me a little longer before I tell you that"
This is just one sample of what I might do. Use this or write your own, but use the elements I used in mine and keep it short and sweet.
old_skoolr
Master Don Juan
Old_skoolr: Pretty much, its my way of screening which girls are worth talking to.
OP what message do you send to girls on OLD sites?
Konada
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 28, 2011
- Messages
- 1,229
- Reaction score
- 649
Me: Hi
Her: Hi
Me: Hey! I'm not into the back and forth texting or pen pal thing. I'd like us to meet for a coffee one night this week and get to know each other better. Let me know if that sounds good to you
I've gotten some pretty harsh rejections along the lines of 'Go find someone else who is into that sort of thing'
marmel75
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2012
- Messages
- 7,175
- Reaction score
- 5,571
Hi is the worst thing you could possibly send as a first message online. They get tons of these lame first messages already, no need to add to it.Me: Hi
Her: Hi
Me: Hey! I'm not into the back and forth texting or pen pal thing. I'd like us to meet for a coffee one night this week and get to know each other better. Let me know if that sounds good to you
I've gotten some pretty harsh rejections along the lines of 'Go find someone else who is into that sort of thing'
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
old_skoolr
Master Don Juan
Hi is pretty generic but whatever works for you.Me: Hi
Her: Hi
Me: Hey! I'm not into the back and forth texting or pen pal thing. I'd like us to meet for a coffee one night this week and get to know each other better. Let me know if that sounds good to you
I've gotten some pretty harsh rejections along the lines of 'Go find someone else who is into that sort of thing'
To be fair, you do have to work on some rapport online before you can throw the lets meet up card.
Though it all depends on the girl.