Dating in your 40's...the women are bat s crazy

[Solomon]

Yeah if they behave like that I don’t put up with it. I relegate them to focktoys.
If they ghost so be it.

I let older women know from the jump Im looking for fun take it orleave it unles they are hot and even thenmeh

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

I never talk about intentions, if she brings up the DTR subject then i talk about it, (if a woman does it’s often waaaaaay too early in the liaison) otherwise they can assume whatever they want.

I let older women know from the jump Im looking for fun take it orleave it unles they are hot and even thenmeh

 

[Solomon]

I never talk about intentions, if she brings up the DTR subject then i talk about it, (if a woman does it’s often waaaaaay too early in the liaison) otherwise they can assume whatever they want.

It always comes up, I rather be upfront about it so there is no miscommunication have had some crazy situations where women think just cause you banged them once you're boyfriend and girlfriend lol

 

[nzrod]

...

38 year old Latina, made plans with me, then reschedules the day of when I message to confirm, she tries to push our date to another date, I'm like, silence and distance...
...

Same thing with me with a 42 yr hot Latina. Always changing the time or date at the last minute, then always 20 - 30 minutes late

 

[nzrod]

Maybe you are the problem.

Dont think so. I know many people who have had the same result. Particularly with women who haven't had a child - they are rarely emotionally balanced or content (with some notable exceptions).

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, I fired my hottest plate, she is in her 40’s and has a natural body that rivals that of 90% of 20-30 year olds (almost hurts to say that).

One of the reasons in the list of reasons I cut off a multi year liaison with her was her chronic tardiness - it simply means she feels her time is more valuable than yours.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

There is a reason you keep finding these type of women. Your screening process is broken in some way. I'd look very closely at what you put value in terms of what makes a woman suitable for an LTR. I would be willing to bet you place her looks far higher than you should, which means you ignore red flags galore in other places.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Yep, my multi millionaire butt is the problem, not the women who are hot and never married and childless or have three divorces behind them by 40. GENIUS!!!

Plenty of people make great decisions in some areas of their lives and terrible decisions in other areas of their lives.

The fact you are constantly putting the balme on others for the positions YOU put yourself in is very telling.

The only constant in all of this is YOU. When there are a lot of variables and one constant and the same problems, well...your ego doesn't want to allow you to see it, but the truth is there nonetheless.

Making sound financial decisions has no bearing on making good relationship decisions and the ability to screen women properly for what ACTUALLY matters for long term relationship suitability.

Your problem seems to be that you base 90% of their LTR qualifications off looks and that is not how to properly screen someone for an LTR. That's how to properly screen someone for a FWB only.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Same thing with me with a 42 yr hot Latina. Always changing the time or date at the last minute, then always 20 - 30 minutes late

You allow it, that's why it keeps happening. No consequences for her.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Same thing with me with a 42 yr hot Latina. Always changing the time or date at the last minute, then always 20 - 30 minutes late

Older women from Catholic cultures *love* to try and see how hard you are willing to work for them/what you are willing to put up with.

 

[BeExcellent]

You end up with what you tolerate and/or allow. If you guys quit tolerating bad behavior, the bad behavior either stops or you stop seeing a chick with bad behavior. Simple.

But if you don't think you can replace a hot chick with bad behavior easily, then your tolerance erodes and here you end up.

Scarcity mindset at work here folks. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

[member160292]

As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, I fired my hottest plate, she is in her 40’s and has a natural body that rivals that of 90% of 20-30 year olds (almost hurts to say that).

One of the reasons in the list of reasons I cut off a multi year liaison with her was her chronic tardiness - it simply means she feels her time is more valuable than yours.

Did you discuss that with her? Early on, my plate was late all the time. I brought it up and now she comes on time or earlier.

 

[Giovanni SouthSide]

Older women from Catholic cultures *love* to try and see how hard you are willing to work for them/what you are willing to put up with.

let me rephrase that
30 year old + women from Catholic cultures *love* to try and see how hard you are willing to work for them/what you are willing to put up with.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Did you discuss that with her? Early on, my plate was late all the time. I brought it up and now she comes on time or earlier.

Yup.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Yup.

Why not just tell her you want her there 20 minutes before you actually want her there?

If she's early that's a quickie.

 

[member160292]

Why not just tell her you want her there 20 minutes before you actually want her there?

If she's early that's a quickie.

Because that’s not how things work

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Why not just tell her you want her there 20 minutes before you actually want her there?

If she's early that's a quickie.

The ship sailed the relationship had other problems, thanks for the encouragement tho.

 

[jnMissouri]

Plenty of people make great decisions in some areas of their lives and terrible decisions in other areas of their lives.

The fact you are constantly putting the balme on others for the positions YOU put yourself in is very telling.

The only constant in all of this is YOU. When there are a lot of variables and one constant and the same problems, well...your ego doesn't want to allow you to see it, but the truth is there nonetheless.

Making sound financial decisions has no bearing on making good relationship decisions and the ability to screen women properly for what ACTUALLY matters for long term relationship suitability.

Your problem seems to be that you base 90% of their LTR qualifications off looks and that is not how to properly screen someone for an LTR. That's how to properly screen someone for a FWB only.

That's an assumption you're making, an untrue one at that. I also expected them to be educated, good income (six figures +) and loyal. Thing is, narcissistic women are good at putting up a social mask. Each of my last three relationships has been shorter and shorter. Six, five and four months. In fact I had another one end (she's still trying to hoover me on and off) And I met these women within weeks of each breakup. I'm getting better at spotting the covert narcissists, but you purely make assumptions that I'm solely basing my selections off of looks. I don't date women who don't have their financials together and they must show certain signs. Trouble is, they are good at faking loyalty and stability for a while. Which is why they try to suck me into a relationship quickly and lock me down by marriage (no chance). It's because they can only keep the façade going for so long.

My last gf was:

-Top university educated.
-Six figure (total comp 200/250K) salary at Fortune 50 company.
-Parents still married.
-Never married.
-No kids.
-26.
-96 lbs
-A drop dead 10/11.
-Asian (Vietnamese, stay away from these, even she told me they are trouble, and neither I or any of my friends have had any non crazy ones....viet girls are usually very hot, remember the hot/crazy matrix....).

As the relationship progressed, I found out she was in therapy, on anti depressants, was up and down in past relationships as well, etc. She was manipulative, etc.

Anyone who has ever been in a relationship knows you don't TRULY know the other person until you've been with them for a while. It's not like she admitted she was crazy in the first few dates (she did admit it a few months in, even saying she was REALLY crazy, not just a little). It's not like she acted unstable on our first few dates. She was on her best behavior until she got comfortable with me. That's when her TRUE self showed....

 

[BackInTheGame78]

That's an assumption you're making, an untrue one at that. I also expected them to be educated, good income (six figures +) and loyal. Thing is, narcissistic women are good at putting up a social mask. Each of my last three relationships has been shorter and shorter. Six, five and four months. In fact I had another one end (she's still trying to hoover me on and off) And I met these women within weeks of each breakup. I'm getting better at spotting the covert narcissists, but you purely make assumptions that I'm solely basing my selections off of looks. I don't date women who don't have their financials together and they must show certain signs. Trouble is, they are good at faking loyalty and stability for a while. Which is why they try to suck me into a relationship quickly and lock me down by marriage (no chance). It's because they can only keep the façade going for so long.

My last gf was:

-Top university educated.
-Six figure (total comp 200/250K) salary at Fortune 50 company.
-Parents still married.
-Never married.
-No kids.
-26.
-96 lbs
-A drop dead 10/11.
-Asian (Vietnamese, stay away from these, even she told me they are trouble, and neither I or any of my friends have had any non crazy ones....viet girls are usually very hot, remember the hot/crazy matrix....).

As the relationship progressed, I found out she was in therapy, on anti depressants, was up and down in past relationships as well, etc. She was manipulative, etc.

Anyone who has ever been in a relationship knows you don't TRULY know the other person until you've been with them for a while. It's not like she admitted she was crazy in the first few dates (she did admit it a few months in, even saying she was REALLY crazy, not just a little). It's not like she acted unstable on our first few dates. She was on her best behavior until she got comfortable with me. That's when her TRUE self showed....

See, that's really a cop out. People will pretty much ALWAYS show you who they really are within the first 3 dates, most of the time on the first date. It's up to you to know how to see the clues, know how to ask questions that seem innocuous but give insights into their personalities and then to believe them.

Many guys fail at step 1, most fail at step 2. They see the red flags, they choose to ignore them.

Let's be real, there were red flags within the first 3 dates, you either didn't see them or chose to ignore them.

At the end of the day, this all comes back to ability to screen properly. Maybe instead of worrying about all those superficial things you should be more worried about what type of person she actually is. Money and Harvard educated doesn't mean sh!t in terms of who she is as a person. That's how I know you aren't screening for things that actually matter, because you said absolutely zero about the type of person she was, only about how much money she makes and other random things.

I'd much rather date a waitress who is a good person than some corporate manager who is a stone cold b!tch.

 

[jnMissouri]

See, that's really a cop out. People will pretty much ALWAYS show you who they really are within the first 3 dates, most of the time on the first date. It's up to you to know how to see the clues, know how to ask questions that seem innocuous but give insights into their personalities and then to believe them.

Many guys fail at step 1, most fail at step 2. They see the red flags, they choose to ignore them.

Let's be real, there were red flags within the first 3 dates, you either didn't see them or chose to ignore them.

At the end of the day, this all comes back to ability to screen properly. Maybe instead of worrying about all those superficial things you should be more worried about what type of person she actually is. Money and Harvard educated doesn't mean sh!t in terms of who she is as a person. That's how I know you aren't screening for things that actually matter, because you said absolutely zero about the type of person she was, only about how much money she makes and other random things.

I'd much rather date a waitress who is a good person than some corporate manager who is a stone cold b!tch.

Well we'll have to agree to disagree. I think it's unreasonable to believe people will show you who they are in the first 3 dates. If that was the case, most women wouldn't end up in abusive relationships. People are on their best behavior early on. You don't really get to know somebody until a few months have passed.

Seems like most people would agree it takes a few months....

how long does it to take to know the real person when dating - Google Search