"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Calling out Cola!

Good Gao

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Hi @cola

I read your thread about working in nightlife but I have a full time office job, typical 9 to 5 in the corporate world, any advice on how to go about working in nightlife?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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cola

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Sorry just seeing this.

Bartending school. Take bartending class get a certificate and hit the pavement.
Go to all the bars in your city and someone will hire you eventually.

Ask for owner/manager and tell them you are a new bartender and will work any night of the week.

If you are big enough to bounce same thing. Thats what I did.
Hit the pavement asked around and now I got 3 bouncing gigs.


A bar 1 night a week, strip club Fridays and Saturdays and a soccer league on Sundays


I look like a NFL linebacker so that helped though.. I'm 6'1 245.
If I wasn't a big guy id go the bartending route though.

Best to catch bar owners/managers right when they open. They won't be as receptive as the bar gets busy.
 
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Chev.Chelios

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wish you were a bouncer in my city cola! Haha
 

Solomon

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Sorry just seeing this.

Bartending school. Take bartending class get a certificate and hit the pavement.
Go to all the bars in your city and someone will hire you eventually.

Ask for owner/manager and tell them you are a new bartender and will work any night of the week.

If you are big enough to bounce same thing. Thats what I did.
Hit the pavement asked around and now I got 3 bouncing gigs.


A bar 1 night a week, strip club Fridays and Saturdays and a soccer league on Sundays


I look like a NFL linebacker so that helped though.. I'm 6'1 245.
If I wasn't a big guy id go the bartending route though.

Best to catch bar owners/managers right when they open. They won't be as receptive as the bar gets busy.

I bet you get a lot of play

I know a bouncer not the best looking guy but he's always got a baddie or two

However I had another buddy who was a bouncer and he hated dealing with drunk people
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Urbanyst

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Come to Baltimore one weekend.
What is the market like in Baltimore right now?

I'm going there today for work. Might stay the night for the hell of it since its Friday.
 

Good Gao

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Sorry just seeing this.

Bartending school. Take bartending class get a certificate and hit the pavement.
Go to all the bars in your city and someone will hire you eventually.

Ask for owner/manager and tell them you are a new bartender and will work any night of the week.
Here are a few problems man

1. I cannot bartend any night of the week, I have a 9 to 5 and need to be at around 7 for work.

2. I want to get a gig at a decent bar or nightclub that draws in hot girls, new bars opening in my area are typically restaurant types that bring in older people for things like brunch and stuff.

Trying to find a way to work this out.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

cola

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Here are a few problems man

1. I cannot bartend any night of the week, I have a 9 to 5 and need to be at around 7 for work.

2. I want to get a gig at a decent bar or nightclub that draws in hot girls, new bars opening in my area are typically restaurant types that bring in older people for things like brunch and stuff.

Trying to find a way to work this out.
Why can't you bartend on Fridays and Saturdays?
Have Sundays to yourself to rest.

That's my current situation ..
Work day job M-F, bounce Friday and Saturday.
 

Good Gao

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Why can't you bartend on Fridays and Saturdays?
Have Sundays to yourself to rest.

That's my current situation ..
Work day job M-F, bounce Friday and Saturday.
That's the issue, most bars won't let me bartend on those nights because those "busy nights" go to the bartenders who have been there for a while. If there is a way to get to that point without sacrificing the weekdays, I am up for it!
 
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