"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Calling out Cola!

Good Gao

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Hi @cola

I read your thread about working in nightlife but I have a full time office job, typical 9 to 5 in the corporate world, any advice on how to go about working in nightlife?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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cola

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Sorry just seeing this.

Bartending school. Take bartending class get a certificate and hit the pavement.
Go to all the bars in your city and someone will hire you eventually.

Ask for owner/manager and tell them you are a new bartender and will work any night of the week.

If you are big enough to bounce same thing. Thats what I did.
Hit the pavement asked around and now I got 3 bouncing gigs.


A bar 1 night a week, strip club Fridays and Saturdays and a soccer league on Sundays


I look like a NFL linebacker so that helped though.. I'm 6'1 245.
If I wasn't a big guy id go the bartending route though.

Best to catch bar owners/managers right when they open. They won't be as receptive as the bar gets busy.
 
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Chev.Chelios

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wish you were a bouncer in my city cola! Haha
 

Solomon

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Sorry just seeing this.

Bartending school. Take bartending class get a certificate and hit the pavement.
Go to all the bars in your city and someone will hire you eventually.

Ask for owner/manager and tell them you are a new bartender and will work any night of the week.

If you are big enough to bounce same thing. Thats what I did.
Hit the pavement asked around and now I got 3 bouncing gigs.


A bar 1 night a week, strip club Fridays and Saturdays and a soccer league on Sundays


I look like a NFL linebacker so that helped though.. I'm 6'1 245.
If I wasn't a big guy id go the bartending route though.

Best to catch bar owners/managers right when they open. They won't be as receptive as the bar gets busy.

I bet you get a lot of play

I know a bouncer not the best looking guy but he's always got a baddie or two

However I had another buddy who was a bouncer and he hated dealing with drunk people
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Urbanyst

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Come to Baltimore one weekend.
What is the market like in Baltimore right now?

I'm going there today for work. Might stay the night for the hell of it since its Friday.
 

Good Gao

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Sorry just seeing this.

Bartending school. Take bartending class get a certificate and hit the pavement.
Go to all the bars in your city and someone will hire you eventually.

Ask for owner/manager and tell them you are a new bartender and will work any night of the week.
Here are a few problems man

1. I cannot bartend any night of the week, I have a 9 to 5 and need to be at around 7 for work.

2. I want to get a gig at a decent bar or nightclub that draws in hot girls, new bars opening in my area are typically restaurant types that bring in older people for things like brunch and stuff.

Trying to find a way to work this out.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

cola

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Here are a few problems man

1. I cannot bartend any night of the week, I have a 9 to 5 and need to be at around 7 for work.

2. I want to get a gig at a decent bar or nightclub that draws in hot girls, new bars opening in my area are typically restaurant types that bring in older people for things like brunch and stuff.

Trying to find a way to work this out.
Why can't you bartend on Fridays and Saturdays?
Have Sundays to yourself to rest.

That's my current situation ..
Work day job M-F, bounce Friday and Saturday.
 

Good Gao

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Why can't you bartend on Fridays and Saturdays?
Have Sundays to yourself to rest.

That's my current situation ..
Work day job M-F, bounce Friday and Saturday.
That's the issue, most bars won't let me bartend on those nights because those "busy nights" go to the bartenders who have been there for a while. If there is a way to get to that point without sacrificing the weekdays, I am up for it!
 
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