"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
"Are you attracted to me?"
- Thread starter snowdog
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
"Oh please, don't flatter yourself....I barely know you! For all I know you could be a psycho woman who loves to cut men up into little pieces and eat them for dinner"
Do it in a joking manner but leave the doubt there. That puts you in a position of power. She's going to be wondering if you're attracted to her unlike most guys who give her signs of interest almost immediately.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Tao walker 2005
Don Juan
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- May 30, 2005
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It depends on how she asks that question. If it's a naive young girl who hasn't been on many dates (or any date at all) - I've dealt with a couple - she might actually be kinda serious about that question. I'd say something like:snowdog said:
"Yeah, a little bit, but...
"If she asks "but what???"
"Hang out with me & find out."
The idea is to give her a little bit of bait, so she doesn't fear rejection and flake, but leave her wanting more.
Blue Phoenix
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2004
- Messages
- 1,335
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Later on you might say "You´re not that bad afterall (wink)".
CyranoDeBergerac
Master Don Juan
g: "Are you attracted to me?"
C: (Laughing) "Well, I was when I asked you out, but that was before I realized you were so needy."
Change subject.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
WC2
Master Don Juan
Danger said:
Igetit!
Moderator
Oh,this is beautiful Danger. Good stuff right here man. Rep. point baby!Danger said:
I'd be curious to know how the convo got to this point. I know that Snowdog wasn't just walking down the street minding his own business,then all of the sudden,out of the blue,some girl just approached him and said,"Excuse me,I have a question for you. Are you attracted to me?".
Count Chocola
Banned
Well, judging from where we stand today, "Do you think I am attracted to you"?
You don't have to answer directly.
But if you want to, the ideal response would be "If I say yes, will you give me a massage? I like massages from attractive women"
There are tons of possibilities.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Daydream Engineer
Banned
- Joined
- Oct 22, 2008
- Messages
- 332
- Reaction score
- 19
Get up on this, show me microphone bliss
She says Are you attracted to me,
do you want to get inside my body,
I tell her its depends, i give her a maybe,
i tell her maybe, maybe your my type,
but, ill rather show you with actions,
because im that kind of suave guy,
who if i was, i would spank your butt,
then tell you, its tight, sure why not
then kiss you, give you butterflies in your gut,
seducing you with my crystal cavern black eyes
so the next time you ask, and i answer the Why,
if am attracted to you, whether its day or night,
be prepared for a swell good of a Jammin' time,
and if that answers your question, good
because rhythm is just a dancer, just like I believe it should.
Meh and if she rejected me and put my in the friend zone i would just play it off in a slightly humorous way anyway.
ARE U ATTRACTED TO ME--------
-a little bit
-ya, you are KINDA cute
-yes but answers...........its dark in here, not wearing my contacts, i've been drinking, i am so not taking you home, more like a friend,
-what do u think, wouldn't you like to know..........
-ummmm you are not really my type
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.