Feel Free To Criticize My Texting Game

[Plinco]

Not trying to interject in the conversation, but I’m surprised the bolded part, coupled with the robotic messages, wasn’t discussed further. It comes across as very authentic but also extremely literal and emotionally uncalibrated, almost asperger-like in the sense that communication is being treated as a purely logical exchange of information rather than an emotional experience.

Someone who communicates too literally often misses that people are reacting less to the actual words and more to the emotional tone, subtext, and social awareness behind them. Communication is not only about exchanging information but also about how you make the other person feel. That is why being overly direct or hyper-literal can come across as cold, awkward, or insensitive, even when that is not the intention.

Self-amusement is a key component of game; women are generally more attracted to positive emotions and fun than to logic. Hence, I always recommend communicating through flattery, humour, and promises rather than treating conversations like a factual exchange.

Finally!

It took three pages and finally someone actually gets it. It's not that I'm incapable of acting mature, I'm not stubborn, I'm not needy, and I'm not afraid, I don't know how to calibrate my communication better than what I've posted in screenshots. This thread will continue until I know how to calibrate my communication properly.

Do you want a result? Or do you want to do things YOUR way?

Why don't you listen to THAT GUY for a change?

Then don't improve.

Yet you INSIST on doing things YOUR WAY.

Your lawn business is actually a great example of your stubbornness in a non-dating field.

Solutions are being spelled out for you, but you don't listen to them because they don't make sense to you. And for that reason, you don't even try.

You and I are spinning our wheels here. You're better at emotional communication than I am. I'm more psychologically developed than you are. When you get integrated at my level the "authority" figures disappear.

 

[BPH]

Finally!

It took three pages and finally someone actually gets it. It's not that I'm incapable of acting mature, I'm not stubborn, I'm not needy, and I'm not afraid, I don't know how to calibrate my communication better than what I've posted in screenshots. This thread will continue until I know how to calibrate my communication properly.

If you don't think you know how to properly communicate, then stop, think, and do/say the things that the version of you who gets the girl would do.

You might not have the best idea of what that is, but you almost certainly have a good idea of what it's not.

 

[SmoothHendrixPS2]

Is there a reason you ask me for my opinion, only to continue doing things your own way?

LMAO being a coach is great when someones coachable

 

[SmoothHendrixPS2]

Talk to women like they are children. Because they are. When you frame you convos in this way you'll see a shift.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Talk to women like they are children. Because they are. When you frame you convos in this way you'll see a shift.

Even though this is sound advice, it’s largely moot for people who don’t have children in their lives in any way or another.

 

[Plinco]

If you don't think you know how to properly communicate, then stop, think, and do/say the things that the version of you who gets the girl would do.

You might not have the best idea of what that is, but you almost certainly have a good idea of what it's not.

I used to get girls by acting stupid as hel1. I was acting like that this morning when I went to my Muay Thai class and everyone there thought I was on drugs.

 

[Plinco]

ChatGPT

What I say is in bold

Hey how's it going gorgeous

High Interest

Hahaha bold opener
It’s going pretty good actually. What about you?

Signals:

• positive reaction
• asks a question back
• keeps energy open

Moderate Interest

Lol hey
It’s going alright

Signals:

• not rejecting you
• but giving very little
• waiting to see if you can make the convo interesting

Low Interest

good hbu

Signals:

• bare minimum response
• no emotional energy
• no curiosity back
• likely talking to multiple people and not especially interested right now

I'm doing ****ing fantastic. You know what I wanna do?


High Interest

That sounds slightly concerning lol
What do you wanna do?

What this means:
She’s engaging with your energy and inviting escalation.


Moderate Interest

Oh yeah? lol
What

What this means:
Still open, but cautious. You need to avoid sounding try-hard or overly sexual here.


Low Interest

what

What this means:
She’s not helping you. If your next message is weak, overly sexual, or awkward, the conversation probably dies.

 

[Plinco]

Let's go play some air hockey

High Interest

Wait stop that actually sounds fun
But just so you know I get aggressively competitive

What she’s signaling:
She accepted the frame and added personality. Very good sign.


A strong next reply:

Perfect. I only talk trash at a professional level though.

Moderate Interest

Hahaha random
Why air hockey

What she’s signaling:
She’s testing whether you’re actually playful/confident or just saying random stuff.


Good response:

Because bowling is too much pressure for a first athletic performance.

Or:

Feels way more fun than pretending we both enjoy small talk over drinks.

Low Interest

lol

What she’s signaling:
Still low investment. At this point, your best move is usually lightness, not pushing harder.


Example:

Damn I can already tell you’re scared of losing.

If she still gives dry replies after that, you move on instead of forcing it.



Your “air hockey” line was actually solid because:

• it’s specific
• playful
• low-pressure
• moves toward a real-life interaction
• different from generic “wyd” texting

The main thing to improve is pacing.
“Hey how’s it going gorgeous” + “I’m doing ****ing fantastic” comes in very strong immediately. Some women will like it, but many will feel you’re trying to force charisma too early.


A smoother version could be:

“You seem fun. We should settle this over air hockey.”

Same confidence, less try-hard energy.

 

[BPH]

@Plinco I don't know what you want, man.

I spelled this out for you, and I'm continuing to spell it out for you...but you're asking ChatGPT? Does ChatGPT get laid? No, it just tells you what you want to hear with brown-nose levels of criticism.

Then you have this forum, full of members who DO get laid, plenty of whom are your age or older, giving you advice as well.

If you don't know what to do, take the Alex Hormozi approach; think of all that you would do if your goal were to f*** things up with these women.

Then just don't do those things - do the opposite, in most cases.

But seriously:

Is there a reason you ask me for my opinion, only to continue doing things your own way?

This thread shouldn't be what it is now. What it should be is you, going out, doing what we're telling you to do, then reporting how it went.

What you're doing instead is this:

Too much talking.

Not enough doing.

View attachment 15419

 

[Plinco]

@Plinco I don't know what you want, man.

I spelled this out for you, and I'm continuing to spell it out for you...but you're asking ChatGPT? Does ChatGPT get laid? No, it just tells you what you want to hear with brown-nose levels of criticism.

Then you have this forum, full of members who DO get laid, plenty of whom are your age or older, giving you advice as well.

If you don't know what to do, take the Alex Hormozi approach; think of all that you would do if your goal were to f*** things up with these women.

Then just don't do those things - do the opposite, in most cases.

But seriously:



This thread shouldn't be what it is now. What it should be is you, going out, doing what we're telling you to do, then reporting how it went.

What you're doing instead is this:

Well that's perfect then. I'll get plenty of feedback while I practice with AI

 

[BPH]

Well that's perfect then. I'll get plenty of feedback while I practice with AI

The fact that you're continuing to practice with AI, rather than practice in the real world, is entirely the problem.

You seem to have completely missed the point, which is why I don't think anybody here, including myself, can say anything that would help you. You have a desire to be correct so badly that you're conversing with something that will never say you're wrong.

I hope you realize this and take action, like when you made 24 approaches in one night, rather than whatever this is supposed to be.

 

[craider]

"I adopt something only when I can make sense of it. I'm not an agreeable person. If I can make logical sense out of it, then I adopt it immediately.

I don't really understand exactly to what expectations people expect me to conform to, or how to conform to them."

That's your problem. Trying to make sense of everything logically is childish. You're looking for safety and desire. That's why you fail women's tests: they want you to give that, not take it. They want you to be the charming gentleman who makes them feel safe on otherwise dangerous adventures. They want you to elevate them into the space they feel they rightfully deserve.

Instead of using playful affect with mature content (disingenuous, boring), why don't you follow BPH's advice and use mature affect with playful content (authentic, mysterious, exciting)?

The answer is because you are unfamiliar with the domain and afraid to exit your comfort zone. When you are ready to do that, or even better, excited by the idea - then you will stop putting it off, and start being magnetic for women. Because they're looking for the same thing, but from a man.

As it stands the women can tell you're afraid to **** them due to the uncertainty of the experience and prejudice that they're somehow the prize. You're the young at heart successful businessman, right? Act like it! The other fellows here are having trouble spelling out the obvious truth: your behavior is incongruent and that scares women!

The hardest part of this journey will be getting over yourself and the habits you've built, and succeeding instead. That is ultimately what women are selecting for, instinctually.

 

[Plinco]

"I adopt something only when I can make sense of it. I'm not an agreeable person. If I can make logical sense out of it, then I adopt it immediately.

I don't really understand exactly to what expectations people expect me to conform to, or how to conform to them."

That's your problem. Trying to make sense of everything logically is childish.

Rationality is the basis of masculinity

Accepting notions on faith, which is what @BPH has a habit of doing, is unbecoming of a man. I don't think BPH does this on purpose. He probably thinks that submission is necessary for learning, which is a notion that people on a lower stage of understanding accept. I don't care, I'm not accepting anything on faith, full stop.

The answer is because you are unfamiliar with the domain and afraid to exit your comfort zone. When you are ready to do that, or even better, excited by the idea - then you will stop putting it off, and start being magnetic for women. Because they're looking for the same thing, but from a man.

As it stands the women can tell you're afraid to **** them due to the uncertainty of the experience and prejudice that they're somehow the prize. You're the young at heart successful businessman, right? Act like it! The other fellows here are having trouble spelling out the obvious truth: your behavior is incongruent and that scares women!

That's not true.

The fact that you're continuing to practice with AI, rather than practice in the real world, is entirely the problem.

You seem to have completely missed the point, which is why I don't think anybody here, including myself, can say anything that would help you. You have a desire to be correct so badly that you're conversing with something that will never say you're wrong.

I hope you realize this and take action, like when you made 24 approaches in one night, rather than whatever this is supposed to be.

I think it's a good idea. People here can pick apart my responses, I see the patterns, and improve my communications.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I think AI could write good messages if you give it a good prompt telling it to focus on getting the girl on a date, be flirtatious, & not waste too much time. Maybe send some of those to your matches instead. Also, Claude might be better than ChatGPT for this use case

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Exho

Let's go play some air hockey

High Interest



What she’s signaling:
She accepted the frame and added personality. Very good sign.


A strong next reply:




Moderate Interest



What she’s signaling:
She’s testing whether you’re actually playful/confident or just saying random stuff.


Good response:




Or:




Low Interest



What she’s signaling:
Still low investment. At this point, your best move is usually lightness, not pushing harder.


Example:




If she still gives dry replies after that, you move on instead of forcing it.



Your “air hockey” line was actually solid because:

• it’s specific
• playful
• low-pressure
• moves toward a real-life interaction
• different from generic “wyd” texting

The main thing to improve is pacing.
“Hey how’s it going gorgeous” + “I’m doing ****ing fantastic” comes in very strong immediately. Some women will like it, but many will feel you’re trying to force charisma too early.


A smoother version could be:




Same confidence, less try-hard energy.

Are you that boring in person that a woman wouldn't enjoy talking with you over drinks?

Seems like a strange thing to say...most women love talking with me when we are out so that's a plus not a con if we are sitting talking over drinks.

 

[Plinco]

Exho


Are you that boring in person that a woman wouldn't enjoy talking with you over drinks?

Seems like a strange thing to say...most women love talking with me when we are out so that's a plus not a con if we are sitting talking over drinks.

I don't do alcohol.

 

[Plinco]

@craider
I see that you are trying to help, which I appreciate. I want you think about what you wrote differently. Instead of looking at sexuality and fun as mindless, look at them as coming from man's rational mind. Think about how much more a woman would feel insecure around a mindless man and how much more secure she would feel around a man who uses his head.

There are so many problems in this world that were justified on some level or another about advocating the so called virtues of being mindless.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I don't do alcohol.

Neither do I. I have taken women out many times and got water. They fvcking loved it and respected the hell out it. I'd even joke with the bartender and tell them to give me the hardest tap water they could find and they thought it was hilarious.

Man, just loosen up a little and stop being so stiff and robotic.

 

[Plinco]

Neither do I. I have taken women out many times and got water. They fvcking loved it and respected the hell out it. I'd even joke with the bartender and tell them to give me the hardest tap water they could find and they thought it was hilarious.

Man, just loosen up a little and stop being so stiff and robotic.

I'm glad to see that.

 

[craider]

Plinco, please don't give advice when you're the one in need.

Women don't want a negotiation. That's your "rational level headed man" right now - an insecure child trying to negotiate his way into panties. Legit, you're bragging to them about your small businesses.

What they want is for you to DEMONSTRATE competency/judgement/rationality. Not talk about it on a forum. Not negotiate based on your idea of what they want. They want to test you, and you to remain rock solid, charming, and sexy. Make a game out of their challenges. Be smooth, as others would say. Take care of everything and be her guardian so long as she's sweet on you. That's the security you're describing but not implementing properly.

You've constructed an alternative version in masculinity in your head that isn't getting you ****ed. The challenge ahead of you is to move forward from that and into a more ... Sexually productive version of your identity.