Feel Free To Criticize My Texting Game

[craider]

He can't be that ugly since he's getting matches on swipe apps. Obviously just afraid to get sexual since he doesn't believe in himself.

Pretend you're BPH for one of these matches and use his lines. The girls are open to you, so put your **** in em verbally.

 

[Plinco]

Is there a reason you ask me for my opinion, only to continue doing things your own way?

I forgot about that line. What the heck I'll try it.

OP might not have the looks/pics to hook them with "how's it going gorgeous". Mileage varies.

@Plinco Nothing from 1990 though.

Yeah unless I want to get her mom's attention

Hi Plinco,
You have so much going for you,Lucid and comical,bringing a Pineapple to an Office Party,telling Birds You make Crop Circles,Cold approaching 20 Ladies in an afternoon,leads me to think that something is going terribly wrong when you try and close the deal,Maybe you're that ugly Sod who rings the Bells at Notre Dame Cathedral LOL.

Yes I made a whole thread about that.

He can't be that ugly since he's getting matches on swipe apps. Obviously just afraid to get sexual since he doesn't believe in himself.

Pretend you're BPH for one of these matches and use his lines. The girls are open to you, so put your **** in em verbally.

Thanks buddy

 

[Plinco]

From one of my recent matches.

 

[BPH]

From one of my recent matches.

Alright...

• "Heyyy" - Remove that from your vocabulary. You are a man in your 40s. That is something women do to be cute. One Y.
• I would argue that the blushing smiley face shouldn't be part of your vocabulary either. I sprinkle in some winks, but again, the blushing thing is cutesy and unbecoming of a man.
• "What are your plans for tonight?" - You could've used that to set up a same-night date right then and there if you'd checked your phone.
• "Beautiful country..." "That's something we can..." "What's your number?" - 3 MESSAGES IN A ROW. Chill out. It is ok to let the conversation flow a bit more and have each of those be separate messages in response to hers. Also, you complimented the COUNTRY, but still nothing that indicates interest in HER.
• "I own a lawn business. Let's talk in person" - You're being too abrupt with handling that speedbump. A better response would've been "I own a lawn business. I'd love to tell you more about it in person, but I'd need your number for that ".
• "Give me your number lady" - Remove "lady" from your vocabulary. It sounds too mature and proper, and even if she IS older, most women would rather not be reminded of that. If you'd broken up your messages you could've simply asked "What's your number?" here, if you hadn't gotten it already, which would've sounded better than essentially having to ask her for it 3 times.

I think you're trying to embrace your "young at heart" ideology to the point of acting it out to these women, and it's not doing you any favors. You are in your 40s - act like it. They are not matching with you because they're expecting some young buck. They are matching with you because they are expecting a MAN.

So be a man.

 

[Plinco]

I appreciate you taking the time to respond.

"I own a lawn business. I'd love to tell you more about it in person, but I'd need your number for that ".

I understand the gist of that but having a discussion about my lawn business would be pretty lame.

"Give me your number lady" - Remove "lady" from your vocabulary. It sounds too mature and proper, and even if she IS older, most women would rather not be reminded of that.

You really think "give me your number lady" sounds mature and proper?

I think you're trying to embrace your "young at heart" ideology to the point of acting it out to these women, and it's not doing you any favors. You are in your 40s - act like it. They are not matching with you because they're expecting some young buck. They are matching with you because they are expecting a MAN.

I'm not going to pretend to be someone I'm not for the sake of getting women, it's a matter of more effective communication. Something I need to figure out, is how other people perceive me and use that as feedback on how to communicate better. You and I have had this discussion before and I don't see myself as any less masculine for enjoying myself when I don't have to be serious. Am I missing something here?

 

[BPH]

I understand the gist of that but having a discussion about my lawn business would be pretty lame.

It doesn't matter. It's literally just a line to incentivize her to give you her number. I wouldn't expect you to ACTUALLY talk about your lawn business the entire time once you've met up.

You really think "give me your number lady" sounds mature and proper?

Yes.

In similar situations, I've used "Girl" or "Woman", but never "Lady". Hell, Patrice O'Neal would probably suggest using the word "Bit**". Listen to some of his recordings from the Black Phillip Show - he's smooth-talked plenty of women by first bashing them a little bit and disarming them.

I'm not going to pretend to be someone I'm not for the sake of getting women, it's a matter of more effective communication. Something I need to figure out, is how other people perceive me and use that as feedback on how to communicate better. You and I have had this discussion before and I don't see myself as any less masculine for enjoying myself when I don't have to be serious. Am I missing something here?

Look man, what do you want?

Do you want a result? Or do you want to do things YOUR way?

Because so far, YOUR way hasn't led to the desired result.

When I was younger and wanted to get better with women, I made adjustments to my behavior and my lifestyle, because the pleasure of the result was worth the pain of the journey. You seem convinced that because you've had success in the past, you can just "do that again" to get results in the future - and that's not how it works. That is a fallacy.

It doesn't mean you're not being you; you're just being the best version of you that you can be.

You've been trying to crack the code for almost 2 years now, and I've laid out a blueprint for you, but you want to make edits. Literally, as I've been typing this, I matched with a hot bisexual 18-year-old at the local college on Hinge, and she's already messaged back.

Why don't you listen to THAT GUY for a change?

It's like you're trying to shove a square peg through a round hole. I'm telling you where the round peg is, but you are absolutely committed to doing it with the square...

 

[Plinco]

It's like you're trying to shove a square peg through a round hole. I'm telling you where the round peg is, but you are absolutely committed to doing it with the square...

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

www.youtube.com

 

[Plinco]

Look man, what do you want?

Do you want a result? Or do you want to do things YOUR way?

Because so far, YOUR way hasn't led to the desired result.

I adopt something only when I can make sense of it. I'm not an agreeable person. If I can make logical sense out of it, then I adopt it immediately.

I don't really understand exactly to what expectations people expect me to conform to, or how to conform to them. If someone tells me and I can make sense of it, then it follows in my head. For example, when I was told not to hit on 18-20 year old women at my local dance bar, I understood that they are trying to run a business and don't want to scare off their more valued customers. As far as acting mature, I think of focusing myself to produce a desired result. I honestly don't know how to act any differently, constructively.

 

[BPH]

I adopt something only when I can make sense of it. I'm not an agreeable person. If I can make logical sense out of it, then I adopt it immediately.

Then don't improve.

When I ask my trainer for diet and exercise suggestions, I don't do other exercises and eat other foods afterwards.
When my CPA asks for certain tax forms, I don't only send the ones I think are important.

It's not that you DON'T act mature, but that you DO act immature.

Think about the type of woman you want to sleep with and have a relationship with. Do you think she's banging guys like you? Because if she's not (she isn't), then you can choose to become the kind of guy she would sleep with...or you can keep searching for that needle in the haystack.

This thread is 2 months old now, but it doesn't seem like you've taken the advice you've been given, because you're still making the same mistakes. The obstacle that stands between you and success is your own ego.

 

[Plinco]

Then don't improve.

When I ask my trainer for diet and exercise suggestions, I don't do other exercises and eat other foods afterwards.
When my CPA asks for certain tax forms, I don't only send the ones I think are important.

It's not that you DON'T act mature, but that you DO act immature.

Think about the type of woman you want to sleep with and have a relationship with. Do you think she's banging guys like you? Because if she's not (she isn't), then you can choose to become the kind of guy she would sleep with...or you can keep searching for that needle in the haystack.

This thread is 2 months old now, but it doesn't seem like you've taken the advice you've been given, because you're still making the same mistakes. The obstacle that stands between you and success is your own ego.

No I really don't understand. I mean exactly what I say.

I think you're trying to embrace your "young at heart" ideology to the point of acting it out to these women, and it's not doing you any favors. You are in your 40s - act like it. They are not matching with you because they're expecting some young buck. They are matching with you because they are expecting a MAN.

Let me ask you this: What is the essence of acting in one's 40's?

 

[BPH]

No I really don't understand. I mean exactly what I say.



Let me ask you this: What is the essence of acting in one's 40's?

Listen, we're getting off-topic at this point, as this encompasses more than simply how you text.

I've given you this advice before. Specifically.

We've talked about how to dress. How to style your hair. What to say. What to text. Where to approach, and what time to go. Going to the gym, etc.

Yet you INSIST on doing things YOUR WAY.

I like video games. I like working out. I like sleeping with women. And I like guns.

That does not mean that I'm showing up to bars wearing a Fortnite shirt, asking women what their favorite exercises are, bragging about a recent sexcapade, with an NRA hat and Oakley shades.

I'm not going to pretend to be someone I'm not for the sake of getting women

This is your problem. You believe that you must remain constantly as you are now, otherwise you're betraying who you "really are", as if people should not change throughout their lifetime.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

.

"He's 40, but looks like he's 30, thinks like he's 20, and acts like he's 10".

That's a line from movie...can't remember which...the young chick in the movie was describing her father.

It is definitely catchy.

Anyways...I agree with the general assessment of your conversation-text-game.

It is obvious that you want to come across as charming/flattering...and the proverbial nice guy.

There is a place for that, especially if you're looking for monogamy.

So, I aint knocking it (although it ain't my style).
.....

However, my only critique is; there is no masculine assertiveness, or boldness coming from you during those exchanges.

No offense, but when reading the transcripts, I can't tell which of you is the female.

Try to be more assertive, and bold...and less soft, and passive.

That's all I got.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Progressing from match to convo to number to date to meet to bang is an art in and of itself.

You aren't doing yourself any favors with the texting/messaging.

Essentially you are grouping yourself in with 90%+ of the guys messaging/texting her.

 

[Plinco]

Progressing from match to convo to number to date to meet to bang is an art in and of itself.

You aren't doing yourself any favors with the texting/messaging.

Essentially you are grouping yourself in with 90%+ of the guys messaging/texting her.

Yes I know. That's why I made this thread. I think of myself as a top 1% man who hasn't gotten there yet.

.

"He's 40, but looks like he's 30, thinks like he's 20, and acts like he's 10".

That's a line from movie...can't remember which...the young chick in the movie was describing her father.

It is definitely catchy.

Anyways...I agree with the general assessment of your conversation-text-game.

It is obvious that you want to come across as charming/flattering...and the proverbial nice guy.

There is a place for that, especially if you're looking for monogamy.

So, I aint knocking it (although it ain't my style).
.....

However, my only critique is; there is no masculine assertiveness, or boldness coming from you during those exchanges.

No offense, but when reading the transcripts, I can't tell which of you is the female.

Try to be more assertive, and bold...and less soft, and passive.

That's all I got.

Thanks for the input. I'm plenty sexualized in my head but I need to figure out how to communicate that in 2026. Maybe I've had that problem to begin with. I used to do really well on apps over a decade ago but things have change since.

Yet you INSIST on doing things YOUR WAY.

I'm not trying to butt heads with you. What I'm asking you to do is to explain it logically so that I can understand it. I've adopted every one of your suggestions that I've been able to make sense of.

I remember talking about one of my cold approaches, and in that approach I asked her what school she goes do. You told me not to do that because it made me sound old. On the other hand, you're saying that I should act my age when I'm texting. I don't even know what a 40 year old man text is supposed to look like.

I'm going to keep hammering away until I get it

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Yes I know. That's why I made this thread. I think of myself as a top 1% man who hasn't gotten there yet.



Thanks for the input. I'm plenty sexualized in my head but I need to figure out how to communicate that in 2026. Maybe I've had that problem to begin with. I used to do really well on apps over a decade ago but things have change since.



I'm not trying to butt heads with you. What I'm asking you to do is to explain it logically so that I can understand it. I've adopted every one of your suggestions that I've been able to make sense of.

I remember talking about one of my cold approaches, and in that approach I asked her what school she goes do. You told me not to do that because it made me sound old. On the other hand, you're saying that I should act my age when I'm texting. I don't even know what a 40 year old man text is supposed to look like.

I'm going to keep hammering away until I get it

Mowing lawns surely won't put you in the top 1% no matter how badly you want to believe it.

 

[Plinco]

Mowing lawns surely won't put you in the top 1% no matter how badly you want to believe it.

You don't think so? Even if I make six figures and have people working for me?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You don't think so? Even if I make six figures and have people working for me?

No. Not unless you have a lawn mowing empire that stretches across America

 

[BPH]

You don't think so? Even if I make six figures and have people working for me?

Your lawn business is actually a great example of your stubbornness in a non-dating field.

When we started working together, you didn't have time to take action because you were mowing the lawns yourself. You told me it would be easier after the season ends.

But then the season ends, and without that revenue stream, now you're not taking action because you can't afford to (I know you RECENTLY made a bunch of approaches, but I'm talking prior to that).

You told me you had a guy who was eager to work for you, but you didn't want to cut into your income. I told you that by hiring him, you would free up your time and enable yourself to take on more business. You didn't do that.

I even referred you to a guy from that entrepreneurship forum who makes six figures with a lawn care business while barely working himself. He's a ****, but he knows that business. I referred you to another guy who travels the country and does "rescues" of people's lawn care businesses. You didn't watch one video or read one forum post.

Solutions are being spelled out for you, but you don't listen to them because they don't make sense to you. And for that reason, you don't even try.

 

[Clockwerk50]

I understand the gist of that but having a discussion about my lawn business would be pretty lame.

Not trying to interject in the conversation, but I’m surprised the bolded part, coupled with the robotic messages, wasn’t discussed further. It comes across as very authentic but also extremely literal and emotionally uncalibrated, almost asperger-like in the sense that communication is being treated as a purely logical exchange of information rather than an emotional experience.

Someone who communicates too literally often misses that people are reacting less to the actual words and more to the emotional tone, subtext, and social awareness behind them. Communication is not only about exchanging information but also about how you make the other person feel. That is why being overly direct or hyper-literal can come across as cold, awkward, or insensitive, even when that is not the intention.

Self-amusement is a key component of game; women are generally more attracted to positive emotions and fun than to logic. Hence, I always recommend communicating through flattery, humour, and promises rather than treating conversations like a factual exchange.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Thanks for the input. I'm plenty sexualized in my head but I need to figure out how to communicate that in 2026. Maybe I've had that problem to begin with. I used to do really well on apps over a decade ago but things have change since.

Too much talking.

Not enough doing.