Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Would a girl I met once 2 years ago remember me?

Reyaj

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I went on a double date so to speak 2 years ago. The outing lasted about 2 hours.

I started talking to this girl again under a different persona and she wants to meet me.

I'm thinking of growing out some facial hair and maybe having a different hair style. Do you think she'd remember me?

We met only one time ever 2 years ago...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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SW15

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If it was a 10-15 minute cold approach 2 years ago, you'd safely be forgotten by most women. There's a decent chance she'll remember a 2 hour date from 2 years ago. 2 hours is a long time. While she probably won't remember a lot of the specifics of the date, she'll remember the general feeling at the end of the 2 hours.
 

Reyaj

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If it was a 10-15 minute cold approach 2 years ago, you'd safely be forgotten by most women. There's a decent chance she'll remember a 2 hour date from 2 years ago. 2 hours is a long time. While she probably won't remember a lot of the specifics of the date, she'll remember the general feeling at the end of the 2 hours.
Yeah so just to clarify, it was a double date sort of thing. Me and my girl, and someone I know and his girl (who is my target). They have since broke up..

So yeah we were together for about 2 hours, but it wasn't an individual date type thing.

You think she will remember?
 

jimwho

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You had better have a reply handy for when she remembers you. Like "I was hoping you'd remember me". Because
If you show up in a trench coat with a beard wearing dark sunglasses, could be construed as Mega Creepy!
 

Reyaj

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You had better have a reply handy for when she remembers you. Like "I was hoping you'd remember me". Because
If you show up in a trench coat with a beard wearing dark sunglasses, could be construed as Mega Creepy!
Haha. Yeah I mean I would deny the hell out of it. If there was a good chance she'd remember me I wouldn't go through with it. That is what I'm trying to assess.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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SW15

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Yeah so just to clarify, it was a double date sort of thing. Me and my girl, and someone I know and his girl (who is my target). They have since broke up..

So yeah we were together for about 2 hours, but it wasn't an individual date type thing.
So you want to hit on the ex-girlfriend of some acquaintance of yours?

Not a good idea.
 

SW15

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Yeah I find her attractive. They are done. What's the problem?
1. The "someone you know" will be pisssed at you for going after his ex. It's probably going to sever that relationship. You'd better hope that man is a low level acquaintance and not one of your close friends or even a 2nd tier friend.

2. There's no guarantee that this woman will find you attractive.

3. You're approaching her through an internet dating website or swipe app. It'd be one thing if you ran into her in some real life manner, like at the grocery store. Getting her number at a grocery store or out in public somewhere would be more understandable than doing this through the use of some sort of technology.
 

Reyaj

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1. The "someone you know" will be pisssed at you for going after his ex. It's probably going to sever that relationship. You'd better hope that man is a low level acquaintance and not one of your close friends or even a 2nd tier friend.

2. There's no guarantee that this woman will find you attractive.

3. You're approaching her through an internet dating website or swipe app. It'd be one thing if you ran into her in some real life manner, like at the grocery store. Getting her number at a grocery store or out in public somewhere would be more understandable than doing this through the use of some sort of technology.
I appreciate the response, all valid points.

1. He is not a close friend. He would never find out though. They don't keep in touch at all and are in different states.

2. Yes, you are absolutely right that she may not find me attractive. She actually is into guys that have facial hair and I'm clean shaven. So I figured I'd try growing facial hair to see if it gives me a shot while also disguising me a bit.

3. So it all comes down to whether she'd remember me or not. If she doesn't remember me then the current narrative fits. If she does the worst that could happen is she finds out who my wifey is and tells her. I'd hope the chances of her doing that are low but that's why I want to see the probability of her remembering me.
 

2Rocky

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Be prepared for the "You look familiar" line. People often remain in our subconscious for a long time. I recommend saying "we must have known each other in a past life. Perhaps we were lovers then, or not and this is our chance to reconnect?"
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Reyaj

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Be prepared for the "You look familiar" line. People often remain in our subconscious for a long time. I recommend saying "we must have known each other in a past life. Perhaps we were lovers then, or not and this is our chance to reconnect?"
Yeah I was anticipating that.. that's a response... What do you think the chances are she'll remember me and the event? All we did they day was sit at a table and talk over drinks.
 

2Rocky

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Look at it this way...If she DOES remember you and still agreed to go out, consider it to be in the PLUS column and just go with it. Don't bring it up unless she does. it could be in your favor... oh "Rey, i thought you were SOOOO CUTE...."
 

Reyaj

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Look at it this way...If she DOES remember you and still agreed to go out, consider it to be in the PLUS column and just go with it. Don't bring it up unless she does. it could be in your favor... oh "Rey, i thought you were SOOOO CUTE...."
She definitely thinks this is a whole new persona she is talking to. If she did remember me she'll remember I was engaged and could dig..

It probably isn't worth the hassle but I being able to pull something like this off would make me smile.
 

oOh Nasty

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Why not just be direct? Even if you were to pull it off, the whole "pretending we've never met" thing just seems a bit too try-hard, considering your 2 hours with her in the past probably isn't even relevant to what's happening right now.

If she finds out that you've known her all this time, she might put you in some kind of borderline catfishing/creep category.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Reyaj

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Why not just be direct? Even if you were to pull it off, the whole "pretending we've never met" thing just seems a bit too try-hard, considering your 2 hours with her in the past probably isn't even relevant to what's happening right now.

If she finds out that you've known her all this time, she might put you in some kind of borderline catfishing/creep category.
Because I've been with someone else for years lol
 

Reyaj

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Oddly enough I've had women I didn't even date and met once remember me after two years, so I asked them out but no date
Interesting.. this is actual proof of potential probability.

What was the scenario you met them in and then later asked them out years later?
 

oOh Nasty

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Unfortunately, there's a high chance she'll remember. For example, I don't even really know you or met you in person, but I think I vaguely remember in a thread years ago that you've mentioned your username stands for your real name backwards.
 

Reyaj

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Unfortunately, there's a high chance she'll remember. For example, I don't even really know you or met you in person, but I think I vaguely remember in a thread years ago that you've mentioned your username stands for your real name backwards.
That's remembering something you read versus physical rememberance though..
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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